Alaska GOP Backs Twilight-Hater Over Nepotism Hire

In the long windup to the 2022 elections, Alaska Republicans managed to find a Senate candidate with an even grimmer view of electoralism than incumbent Sen. Lisa Murkowski, whose stellar track record on representative democracy includes being gifted a Senate seat by her ex-congressmember dad.

The state GOP snubbed Murkowski in favor of opponent Kelly Tshibaka – the Trump suckup and Twilight-basher looking to boost Murkowski from her swing-voting seat. In fairness, it’s pretty optimistic and open-minded for Tshibaka to run in an election, after she claimed the 2020 ones were riddled by “credible allegations of fraud, voter suppression, and voting irregularities.”

But that was a lie engineered to siphon off some of Trump’s voter base, which makes it worse than Murkowski’s method, who at least had the dignity to undermine the meager electoral power of the American public out in the open. (Just to jog our memory, read this Huffington Post piece titled “Alaska Governor Girl’s Revenge,” about what happened when Frank Murkowski resigned from his Senate seat in 2002 to become governor).

The GOP’s Tshibaka endorsement comes four months after the Republican State Central Committee voted to censure Murkowski for voting in favor of Trump’s second impeachment and agreeing that the Jan. 6 riot was bad. Tshibaka’s idea of badness is more focused on Stephanie Meyer’s abstinent vampire erotica, which she called “a perfect example of how the enemy twists, perverts, and ridicules the things of God.”

Now that Murkowski’s been left out in the cold by her cold-hearted brethren in the cold state of Alaska, pundits are calling on Democrats to let her into their warm, bipartisan hearth. “It’s time for Lisa Murkowski to join the Democrats,” simped a recent headline in The Week. Lisa should “declare her independence,” the piece argued, and caucus with Senate Democrats.

They will probably forget she helped confirm both beer-lover Brett Kavanaugh and Amy Coney Barrett, the handmaiden whose blank, soulless stare moves less than Harrison Ford frozen in limestone and who seems about as flexible on constitutional interpretation. Well, whatever. Nothing says democracy quite like getting hired by your direct blood relative.