Welcome once again to the post where we interrupt our coverage of suspiciously unseen celebrity infants to offer a word of thanks to the people who send us money in exchange for placing tiny, unobtrusive advertisements on this site for products and services you can't possibly live without. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and join the online advertising revolution, see this page.

We love it and you love it — the weekly thank-you to Valleywag's advertisers.

Please join us in celebrating the monetary and spiritual contributions of this week's sponors, whose continuing support may allow us to keep this site afloat long enough to finally gaze on a photograph of Tom Cruise's baby. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and help us wait out Tom and Suri, see this page.

Please join us now as we take a moment to rejoice in our venerated sponsors, each and every one of which deserves their own themed baseball night. No single, racist arm gesture performed simultaneously by a stadium full of fans could adequately relay just what they mean to us, however. If you'd like to join their major leagues, simply go here.

From floods to printing and emailing, is there anything water can't do?

Time for that weekly moment where advertising takes over editorial — the sponsor thank-you. Once again, Valleywag's sponsor is Endless Pools. As always, your first step on the road to sponsor status begins here. And now we're left like awkward lovers with no cigarettes. So, er, here's some Hamlet.

Now is the time when we grab the hands of this week's sponsors and skip along the beach, totally unaware of the nasty teenagers who are scoffing at the joyful, silly way we're swinging our arms. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and get started on your plan to become the most powerful company in your industry of choice, see this page.

Join us in our brief expression of our undying devotion to this week's sponsors, a collection of incredibly generous corporate interests who want nothing more than to bring joy to all our lives. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and help ease the world's suffering, see this page.

To this week's sponsor, a poem in the Fibonacci style.

Let us take a moment of silence to express our deep gratitude for all the wonderful luxuries readily available to us that we regularly take for granted, such as the products, and/or services of our beloved sponsors. If you would like to help shield the world from suffering by advertising with us, everything you need to know is right here.

You know those endless pools at the Googleplex? (Actually, can someone take photos closer than from the glass-walled hallway above them? Pixplz at tips@valleywag.com kthxbai.) Maybe that sale convinced Endless Pools, this week's brave Valleywag sponsor, that rich geeks love swimming in one direction for hours. Yeah, I hear Napster's Sean Fanning totally got toned from swimming, dancing, and sex. (That is a lie.) Anyway, thanks, Endless Pools!

Valleywag again thanks its oh-so-special advertiser, Endless Pools.

Join us in recognizing our love for this week's sponsors, with whom we would happily retreat to a povery-stricken African nation in hopes of shielding the birth of our love child from the world's harsh glare. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and marinate in the same kind of passion, see this page.

Valleywag pledges to love and cherish our advertiser:

There comes a moment in one's life when you realize the steady stream of starlets you've chosen to link yourself to, on the firm advice of your agent, are nothing but a bearded smokescreen cloaking your true feelings from the world. "Enough!" we say. We are sponsor-lovers. As a goose. There—we've said it. And we could care less how it will affect our waning career or pretty boy image. It just feels right. If you'd like to join the sponsor-lover pride parade, everything you need to know is right here.

Fireworks and cheap American beer for our sponsors, who this week helped us bring all our white pants out of storage in anticipation of the summer season. Care to join our garden party? There's information here.

Much businesslike respect to the advertisers, who pay Valleywag's bus ticket to Ritual Roasters.

This whole blog "business" is far too immature for us to rent out a theater somewhere, invite Tom Cruise, Lindsay Lohan, and Les Moonves to do a little song-and-dance about our upcoming content offerings, and then get a club full of potential advertisers greviously drunk, but please know that we would do all of these things in a heartbeat if it were within our means. Instead, we briefly thank this week's sponsors and invite others to see this page for exciting ways new ones can fork over their online advertising dollars and assist us with our smaller-scale consumption of alcohol.

Our love for this week's sponsors is total, perfect, complete. Join us in celebration the alpha and omega of our affection for those bullet-pointed below, knowing that their goods and services will bring you utterly mind-blowing satisfaction. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and grab your own piece of ecstasy, see this page.

Thanks to the advertisers, who look good in blue button-downs: