Two teenage celebrities might be getting married, and therefore: doing it. Robert Pattinson's life is invaded by aliens. Paula wants back on Idol, and I want back in the womb. Madonna, Sinatra, Spears, Spacey. Presenting your Sunday Morning Gossip Roundup:
All good things come, ha, to ends. In pop culture, canonizations are routinely bestowed by porn. Meet the comedic genius that's TMSleaze, starring Ron Jeremy as Harvey Levin. Featuring Speidi, Jessica Simpson/Tony Romo, Amy Winehouse, American Idol, Eminem, and LaLohan.
Jessica Simpson's breakup was caused by her idolatry of a plastic toy. Amy Winehouse has fun adventures with a private dick. Lindsay Lohan's employed, Saved By The Bell, Charles Manson, Mary Cheney, and more. Here's your Sunday Morning Gossip Roundup:
Jude Law has knocked up an unnamed lady-friend, Mel Gibson attacks someone in a club, George Clooney has an Italian "lapdance model" by his side, Mischa Barton's friends are worried about her and Amy Winehouse's dad fakes a heart attack.
• Jude Law's rep says that the actor recently found out that he's expecting a fourth child. The mom? She's "an unidentified former lover." Congrats? [EW, People]
• It was less than two weeks ago that Mischa Barton was put under psychiatric care after she going on a drug-fueled bender and suffering a breakdown. Now she's in NYC, putting in long hours playing a character with a drug problem. Maybe this isn't the best idea? [NYDN]
• Remember when Bethenny Frankel announced a few weeks ago that she was engaged to "a real estate bigwig" named Jason Hoppy? According to one "insider," the engagement may be a big publicity stunt, and Hoppy may be a "medical sales rep/personal trainer," not some property-owning master of the universe. [Fox News]
• A treasure trove of Madonna memorabilia, collected by one of her long lost ex-boyfriends, is going up for auction. Yes, 17 minutes of "erotic phone messages" could soon be yours. [P6, NYDN]
• Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush have broken up. Tragic! [People]
• It looks like Dr. Conrad Murray gave Michael Jackson a dose of the powerful anesthetic propofol right before his death and that was what killed him. And it looks like Murray could face manslaughter charges because of it. [TMZ, NYDN]
• Mischa Baron says she's feeling better and is ready to go back to work. [Us]
Orlando Bloom passes on playing Will Turner to be with his girlfriend, Megan Fox thinks zombies are sexy, Tara Reid is quite skinny, Paris Hilton claims to have inspired Michael Jackson and Amy Winehouse almost dies after a binge.
• Poor J. Lo. She threw a big 40th birthday party for herself over the weekend and some guests actually had the nerve to show up late! [NYDN]
• It's been a rough ride for Kate Major, the former Star reporter who said she was Jon Gosselin were in love. On Saturday, Gosselin said he was single; on Sunday, the tabloids suggested Major was a former escort. So now she's supposedly planning to get revenge by writing a tell-all. [People, NYDN, NYDN]
• In other Gosselin news, he was seen buying himself $950 wingtips over the weekend, or "two pairs of shoes for each of his kids." [P6]
• Although they've been dating for months now (and haven't exactly been doing a very good job of keeping their relationship a secret), Kate Hudson and A-Rod went public with their romance on Saturday. [NYDN]
• This may look like a still from a new Angelina Jolie movie. But it's not. It's the real Angelina Jolie, who made her third trip to Iraq this week and also stopped off in Jordan. What's she doing? She's saving the world, don't you know that? [NYDN]
• Kate Major, the ex-Star reporter who's been seen in the company of Jon Gosselin, might be out to be famous. Unbelievable! [NYDN]
• The Jackson family is out of money. That sure was quick, huh? [NYDN]
• It's official: designer Esteban Cortazar and Emanuel Ungaro are parting ways. [WWD]
• The 20 biggest scandals in fashionland. [Pipeline]
• Amy Winehouse is planning to launch a perfume? Really? Please say this isn't so. [Grazia]
• What t-shirt you decide to wear in the Hamptons makes all the difference, apparently. [NYT]
• Manhattan is far thinner than the rest of the country. Simon Doonan (5-foot-4, 135 lbs.) on what it's like to travel to other parts of the country: "I'm appalled by people my age who can't get through the airport without a wheelchair." [NYT]
• How does he find the time? It looks like Jon Gosselin has dumped his girlfriend from five minutes ago and is now focusing his attention on Star reporter Kate Major. (For this week, at least.) In what sounds like the most nausea-inducing meal ever, Gosselin and Major had dinner in the Hamptons last night with Michael Lohan and Jill and Bobby Zarin. [People, Star, Us]
• Rumor has it Gossip Girl's Jessica Szohr and Ed Westwick have split up. [P6]
• Jude Law got into a scuffle with a paparazzo last night. [Sun]
• Mischa Barton's publicist has been busy trying to land the troubled actress the cover of a weekly tabloid. Sadly, there have been no takers so far. [P6]
Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler are probably boning, Mischa Barton has a serious "medical issue," Jon Gosselin's new lady is a walking white-trash stereotype, The Hoff parties with Lady Gaga, Madonna has "bingo wings" and Robert Redford gets married.
• The police were called to Mischa Barton's home yesterday and she was escorted out of the house so she could be treated for some sort of "medical issue." Her condition hasn't been disclosed yet, but we're going to go ahead and assume it wasn't a case of seasonal allergies. [Sun]
• Bethenny Frankel may be giving up her spot on the Real Housewives next season so she can star in a Bravo show of her own. Neither Frankel and Bravo were willing to confirm the news, though, so we're going to keep our fingers crossed and hope this is just a crazy rumor that has no basis in reality, okay? [P6]
• Kim Kardashian almost got stranded in Africa when she couldn't locate her passport. The operative word there is "almost": Sadly, boyfriend Reggie Bush found it a few minutes later, so she was able to return to the U.S. [People]
Tony Romo dumped Jessica Simpson, Quentin Tarantino talks retirement, Larry King's wife eyes a Broadway role, Renee Zellweger can't get laid, Megan Fox has to get drunk to watch her movies and Lindsay Lohan's hair is falling out.
• Tony Romo dumped Jessica Simpson the night before her 29th birthday. The worst part? She was forced to cancel the "Barbie and Ken-themed birthday party" she'd planned for the next day. [NYDN]
• Ali Wise, the publicist accused of hacking into the voicemail of Nina Freudenberger, has a new accuser: A fashion designer named Briana Rasinski has also filed a harassment complaint with the NYPD. [P6]
• Chace Crawford has moved out of the pad he shared with Ed Westwick. [Us]
• "Real Housewives" Jill Zarin and Danielle Staub got into a little tiff at an event the other night. No one was hurt, you may be disappointed to hear. [NYDN]
• Arrivals: Molly Ringwald gave birth to twins last Friday. And Mira Sorvino gave birth to a son after a "difficult pregnancy." [NYDN, Us]
• It looks the end of the line for Fox News anchor Kimberly Guilfoyle and husband Eric Villency, the heir to a furniture store chain founded by his grandfather and occasional TV presence. It's Guilfoyle's second high-profile break-up. Her first husband was San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom. [P6]
• Sean Avery and model Hilary Rhoda were spotted "getting cozy" the other night. [P6]
• Ed McMahon, Johnny Carson's sidekick on The Tonight Show for more than three decades, has died at 86. [NYT, People]
• This is a bizarre one: Two police chiefs in Ohio are now under investigation for allegedly breaking into the home of the surrogate mom hired by Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick in an effort to dig up dirt on the woman, which they then planned to sell to the tabloids or use to blackmail the couple. [Us, E!, NYDN]
• Madonna is gearing up for the arrival of baby Mercy. Gwynnie is helping to decorate and Mercy's room will supposedly feature "porcelain dolls, antique teddy bears, a library of leather-bound children's books and ancient maps of Africa to adorn the walls." [Sun]
• It looks like Lindsay Lohan is off the hook for that $400,000 jewel heist the other day. So at least there's one thing looking up for her. [NYDN]
