New York City already has four huge Apple stores, which are doing fine keeping the city's residents stocked with overpriced pieces of metal. But that's not good enough for Brooklyn borough president Marty Markowitz. He's begging Steve Jobs for an Apple Store.
Steve Jobs's uniform of jeans and a black turtleneck has heretofore seemed less like a sophisticated sartorial choice than a savvy exercise in personal branding, a symbol of ascetic devotion to technology, and perhaps, once, a bit of marketing for the Gap, where Jobs was a director. But if acclaimed couturier Ralph Rucci is to be believed, the Apple CEO might be so far ahead of the fashionistas that he's been severely underappreciated.
Is your ego underinflated? Do you lack the mass media ubiquity and blind teen adulation required for true self worth? Luckily there's an iPhone app to help! Meet "Fan Mail."
Who among us hasn't walked into an Apple store and secretly thought, "Damn, I'd love to loot this place." All those huge, bright windows and all those pricey iPhone 4s waiting to be hurled through them! Apple knows how you feel: The company is locking down its UK stores like Alcatraz.
Foxconn Technology Group — the company that assembles iPads and iPhones in hellish Chinese factories that have had at least 13 workers commit suicide — might have found a solution to its disgruntled worker problem. Over the next three years, the company will increase the number of robots on factory assembly lines from about 10,000 to 1 million. One analyst told Reuters, "Rising salary costs should be the key reason why Foxconn is doing this."
Why do we even bother with our stupid old "democratically-elected government," anyway? Let's replace it with Apple, Inc., which not only has a better design aesthetic but right now has more money than the U.S. Government:
Mark Malkoff struggled heroically to get thrown out of an Apple store. Having a pizza delivered didn't do it. Bringing in a band didn't do it. Dressing as Darth Vader didn't do it. Not even the goat got him ejected.
This summer it seems every day brings dire news of a new data breach perpetrated by shadowy hackers. For those prone to panic, it might be enough to end in a hospital visit. But there's no need to freak out about every single attack reported by a hacker-obsessed media.
Was everyone at Google stoned when the company was placing bids on a collection of Nortel Networks patents that it could've really used? Because here are three of their bids: $1,902,160,540; $2,614,972,128; $3,141,592,653. Yes—that last one is Pi billion dollars.
Apple is becoming a major diplomatic player. The company agreed to remove an iPhone app devoted to Palestinian insurrection, eliciting praise for "swift action" from Israel's public diplomacy minister. This sort of app removal is going to get tricky.
It turns out there's a reason your iPhone has been stalking you: It might use your private data to hook you up with nearby iPhone owners. And you thought your mom was an awkward matchmaker.
If you lock your iPhone behind a passcode, there's a good chance you've chosen from one of just 10 extremely common combinations. It's time to switch to something that actually protects your data.
For ultimate proof of Steve Jobs' salesmanship, look not to the Apple CEO's keynotes, but to this one-minute presentation of a new Apple headquarters to the Cupertino City Council. It will make you consider buying an actual office park.
Who is the one person allowed to stand up to corporate diva Steve Jobs and criticize the Apple CEO to his face? That would, of course, be musical diva Lady Gaga, who recently talked a little trash at Apple headquarters.
