“I Sea” billed itself as an app that would “empower the billions of us with smart devices” to do something about the thousands of migrants that have already drowned in the Mediterranean. For the last few days, Mashable, Reuters, Wired and others chirpily blogged about it, and why not? It sounded so impressive! Wouldn’t you want to “spend your lunch break searching for migrants who might be in need of help”? The app’s slick promo video promised to use “the power of crowdsourcing to help monitor the vast sea, and make the impossible possible.” Sorry, but “I See” did not make the impossible possible, because vile PR stunts rarely do.

While elitist urban bloggers fret over what the “online gig economy” will do our nation’s future, most American’s don’t even know what the fuck “Uber” means.

Ted Cruz and John Kasich share more than just antipathy for Donald Trump. According to the Associated Press, a report issued by the software company Symantec found that phone apps released by both campaigns are not only incredibly invasive but also vulnerable to hackers.

In what is a major get for South by Southwest (SXSW) and a deeply embarrassing move for the Office of the President, Barack Obama will be interviewed in a “keynote conversation” during the annual vanity carnival’s opening day. All of which is to say, Obama’s about to drop an app.

A federal judge handed down a significant ruling in favor of the Uber drivers suing the ride-hailing start-up in California for misclassifying workers, expanding the class to a potential total of 160,000 employees.

Uber is now worth more money than General Motors. Will the hundreds of thousands of Americans who drive for Uber ever be able to earn a living wage?

As of today, well-meaning New Yorkers who see a Sikh riding the subway or smell something weird in Times Square can submit their paranoid fantasias to the proper authorities with an app. Your new mantra: If you see something, send something.

Apple has for many years attempted to project its incoherent definition of decency onto iPhone users, typically when it comes to sex. But as of today, we know that news about killer drone strikes is too hot for the App Store, too.

My new favorite app is: myPill, a pink- and purple-colored period and birth control pill tracker that costs $4.99 in the app store. I bought it this week on the recommendation of my younger sister, and I’m glad I did. The price is probably not worth it for the main pill reminder feature—just set a regular alarm!—but it pays for itself considering how much good advice from teen girls is on there.

Karen made me uncomfortable. I didn’t like her face: her makeup revealed a hasty hand, her skin, often uplit, looked like a thin sheet thrown over a bare mattress, and her eyes were dangerous voids concealed with emotion, like deep hole traps used to catch animals in the forest. She scatted to herself the first time we “met.” But even as I began to feel unnerved, I didn’t stop playing with her. I told myself it was because it was just a game, and I wanted to see what happened.

Just a few short weeks ago, a gaggle of the biggest names in music gathered to announce Jay Z’s new streaming music service, Tidal. I remind you of this fact because, statistically speaking, you’ve probably already forgotten about it: Tidal is now the 50th most popular music app in the iTunes store, and doesn’t even crack the top 700 overall.

Ukranian soldiers outside Debaltseve received a mass text message telling them that they would not be killed if they surrendered to rebel troops who have surrounded the city, the Guardian reports.

Yo, the "context-based" messaging app that has already landed $1 million in funding for each of the one words it can send ("yo"), has crossed the desk of Stephen Colbert, and he is not impressed. His extremely concise review: "Y?"

Mardi Gras in New Orleans is so packed that tourists are willing to pay cash for a comfortable place to poop, and now there's an app that toilet owners can use to take their money.

"Why Don't We Have a Monogamy App?" Ann Friedman asks in her latest New York magazine story. Yeah. Why don't we?

One of the sad byproducts of the media conspiracy to ignore this week's pro-life conference in Washington was that we almost missed this new iPhone app for baby-savin'. If only we'd seen it on Wednesday, we could've told you how much it sucked sooner:

Before I even received the invite to check out the Proust app this summer, I was hooked. I watched my friend play it on his phone, dragging a list of five items (thematically linked or not) around on his phone to his satisfaction and then submitting it to the then-microscopic community of those with alpha versions arrived. I played it for about four hours straight once I received my invite, going through the entire slate of lists to rank and submitting a few of my own.

As a respite from the horrible news out of the Philippines: Here's an app called "What Would I Say?" that takes your old Facebook statuses and writes your next one for you. What's your best result?

Children love to tear bugs limb from limb. Eventually, however, the rush of sadism gives way to the pity one has for the lifeless form crumbled beneath their hands. The fragility of life, the small plane between being and nothingness has been revealed to the young individual and they turn to the heavens and reflect on the next few decades of struggling to accept their demise... Or they forget all that and strap on an electrode and control the insect's body through a cell phone App.

It's been a long time since the last war in ... where was it, Libya? Libya, yes. A good war. And like the iPhone, we apparently need a new version of this war every two years.