Barack Obama is in Hawaii celebrating the holidays with his family and attempting yet again to forge a long-form birth certificate. And what have pool cameras caught him doing over the long weekend? Having lots of fun!

Barneys creative director and noted gay male Simon Doonan oversaw White House Christmas decor this year, and his trees are an assault on family values, say right-wing bloggers. Then again, does Mao Tse-Tung really belong on Obama's tree?

So he's prank-calling local news-talk radio shows as "Barry From D.C." Is it five yet? Anyone up for lunch?

BREAKING: "President Barack Obama says the only Christmas presents he needs from his daughters are hugs."

If your definition of cute includes Barack Obama and small children, go read Margaret Talev's report of Obama's visit with DC kids: "he asked a kid who wants a cell phone, 'Who you gonna call?' Kid: 'Everyone.' POTUS: 'Like who?'"

Thanks to the media-hating GOP, the poor saps who cover Congress will be spending Christmas Eve in the Capitol watching Communism happen in the form of a vote on the healthcare bill. Their White House counterparts will be in Hawaii.

Merry Christmas, haters of liberal media: Here is a dazzling charticle depicting TIME's favorite cover girls. Though Nixon has the most covers ever, Obama's on track to beat him, threefold, by the end of his presidency. [Teqnolog]

Wow. Talk about burying the lede. Obama and Clinton went BAD. ASS on some sucka climate change opposition. The two've been chipping away at this Copenhagen summit, but it took them busting down a door to get things "handled." Observe:

Tonight, Glenn Beck's crazy train (or plane, per his tweet) made a stop at The Jay Leno Show for a mostly soft-hitting—albeit entertaining—interview, followed by a baking segment. Yes, really. Video of both, and some choice quotes, ahead.

Chaos in Copenhagen! A tense meeting between Barack Obama, Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao, and Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh began with violence. Reporters were shoved!

On the up side, we now know Santa's White House flight pattern and the importance of reindeer snacks. Univision's news reporters must be pissed that their network gave a presidential sit-down to a pop star.

[Straight allies Robert De Niro and Bruce Springsteen show President Obama their support for gay rights at a reception for the Kennedy Center Honors recipients at the White House on December 5. Image freshly uploaded to the White House's Flickr]

In the grand tradition of the last two guys, Obama has written a "personal" letter to megalomaniac North Korea dictator Kim Jong-Il. But will Kimmy agree to go steady? Welcome to the middle school dance of international diplomacy.

Two weeks before the Salahis crashed their way into America's consciousness, a couple of Georgian tourists unwittingly bumbled into an invite-only lunch at the White House. Their story, as reported today by the AP, is adorable.

Goldman Sachs chief Lloyd Blankfein, Morgan Stanley CEO John Mack, and Citigroup chairman Dick Parsons were all supposed to be in Washington yesterday to meet with President Obama at the White House. But then a tiny patch of fog materialized in the skies overhead and they had to retreat to their offices, victims of a force even more powerful than Wall Street's mightiest: Mother Nature. So how did that go down in Washington?

Working for Gawker does not lend itself to getting invited to fancy media holiday parties. So we have to use Twitter to spy on them. After the jump: three of tonight's fancy parties and a plea for your help.

on how much he loves Barack Obama, to Playboy via SeattlePI.com.

Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein, Citigroup chairman Dick Parsons, and Morgan Stanley CEO John Mack all skipped out on a scheduled dressing-down today from Barack Obama because "inclement weather" made it physically impossible for them to travel to Washington. Convenient!

Change isn't easy. Just ask Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein and Morgan Stanley chief John Mack, both of whom were unable to personally attend a meeting with the president in Washington today after their US Airways flights were delayed because of "fog."

the former President describing his reaction to seeing Rep. Joe Wilson scream out "You Lie!" during Barack Obama's health care speech in September, to Parade magazine via Politico.