According to the Sunday Mirror, Chester Hanks, the slightly-less-beloved son of beloved actor Tom Hanks, is wanted by police in Britain after losing his shit and causing more than $1800 in damage to a hotel room near Gatwick Airport, 28 miles south of London.

Chester "Chet Haze" "Son of Tom Hanks " "Man of the World, Man of the People" Hanks was back on Instagram last week giving the world what we demand: more characters! Chet, it's been a while since we could embrace your character acting and alter egos. What's this? Bless you. Prayers have been answered, for we were all waiting. A new alter ego!

If you enjoyed the heart-pounding action of Saving Private Ryan and the taut intrigue of The Da Vinci Code, you'll love dynamic thrill ride that is: The Son of the Star of Those Movies Lost His iPad.

Feeling pretty satisfied with yourselves this morning, Obama supporters? Feeling real "proud" that your man won? Feeling nice and positive about all the "good things" that might happen over the next four years?