cocaine

Sean Parker Gets Friendly with Lindsay Lohan

Ryan Tate · 06/30/11 07:09AM

Shortly after being fired as Facebook president, Sean Parker was ejected from Bungalow 8 for piercing the eardrums of Lindsay Lohan and her entourage with his drunken screams. Five years later, the pair very much appear to have made up.

Did Anyone Happen to Leave Their Cocaine-Stuffed Sneakers at JFK?

Seth Abramovitch · 06/27/11 11:45PM

No, that isn't Charlie Sheen's shoe closet. Running shoes stuffed with nearly five pounds of cocaine were discovered in an abandoned suitcase left at John F. Kennedy Airport last Thursday, a spokesperson for U.S. Customs and Border Protection announced today.

Flesh-Eating Drugs Hit U.S., Russia

Max Read · 06/21/11 06:36PM

You should really stop doing cocaine. Not because it's addictive, or anything, but because it's likely laced with levamisole, a veterinary drug used for de-worming livestock, and it will make your flesh rot off.

While We're At It, Let's Free All Nonviolent Drug Offenders

Hamilton Nolan · 06/02/11 09:39AM

Attorney general Eric Holder has come out in favor of reduced sentences for thousands of people currently imprisoned on nonviolent crack cocaine convictions. (A recent law corrected the insane sentencing disparity between crack and powder cocaine; Holder is simply recommending that the new sentencing guidelines be applied to some people already in jail.) That's a great first step. Then can we let out all the other drug war victims, too?

'Bundles' of Cocaine Floating in New Mexico Lake

Jeff Neumann · 04/25/11 05:03AM

A small plane crashed yesterday in New Mexico's Lake Heron, and there are no reports of survivors. However, shortly after the crash, police told the Santa Fe New Mexican that "several packages began surfacing," referring to packages of cocaine. Police have cordoned off the area and will dutifully report every last gram of cocaine that is retrieved from the lake.

Is NASA Selling Cocaine to Aliens?

Max Read · 03/16/11 02:13AM

A small packet of cocaine has been found at NASA's Kennedy Space Center, almost exactly 14 months after cocaine was last found at the Kennedy Space Center, as keen observers of space and/or cocaine will no doubt note. But does this indicate that NASA is the most fun government agency—or that it's a front organization for a vast, interplanetary drug ring? Seems to us it's time to put the space-detectives on the case! (This can be the basis for the sixth season of The Wire.) When asked if the recent discovery had any link to the death of a NASA contractor on Monday, spokeswoman Renee Juhans said, "maybe." No, ha, she actually said "no comment." And then she had the reporter whacked. [AFP]

Police Say Man Hid Drugs in Penis

Max Read · 02/08/11 08:51PM

Police say they found a "small bag" of crack hidden inside the foreskin of one Antoine Banks, late of Fairdale, Ky., during a strip search ordered after another small bag of cocaine was found "tied to the waistband of Banks' boxers." There are, probably, better places on one's body to secrete contraband—certainly there are more comfortable places—but the drug-concealing ability of the male human foreskin is, I think, an under-explored aspect of the circumcision debate. [WLKY]

Florida Bans Snortable 'Bath Salts'

Jeff Neumann · 02/08/11 07:41AM

Following Louisiana's lead, last week Florida slapped an emergency ban on synthetic drugs that are marketed as "bath salts" because people are losing their minds after snorting and smoking "Vanilla Sky," "White Lightning," and "Ivory Snow." The state's attorney general was pushed to ban the "drug" after some people flipped out, according to NPR:

Teen Burglars Accidentally Snort Man's Ashes

Richard Lawson · 01/19/11 05:41PM

Some teens in Florida (natch) recently robbed a woman's home, taking, among other things, the ashes of her father and two Great Danes. Hungry for drugs, they snorted them. Upon realizing their mistake, they threw the ashes in a lake.