Eli Valley is publishing a collection of his comics this year with OR Books.

My kids were talking at dinner about the fictional characters Butterbean and Sparkleface.

“Hi, I am a reality show producer looking for an assistant for a Real Superman Show.” Simple, yes? No. This is “high concept” metaphysical stuff, and you, potential assistant, need to grasp the tenuous connection between phenomenal celebreality and literary fiction, so please bear with this producer for 5,500 words.

Archie Andrews, star of a comic you read sometimes and perpetually caught in a love triangle with Betty and Veronica, will die in the issue of Life With Archie hitting stands Wednesday.

This is love. An Ohio man remembered he might have a copy of the first Spider-Man comic ever in a box in his attic, found it, and sold it to help pay for his daughter's wedding.

For the last year or so, freelance cartoonist Gavin Aung Than has been using his talents to turn inspirational quotes from some of the world's greatest thinkers into inspirational comic strips.

Kim Thompson, co-publisher of beloved graphic-novel and literary-comics imprint Fantagraphics Books, died this morning. He was 57.

Did you know that the federal government is on track to enact massive, across-the-board spending cuts one week from today—cuts that that could affect important government services, cost hundreds of thousands of people their jobs and greatly slow the growth of the economy? No? You didn't? It's okay: it's an incredibly boring story. But don't worry! We're going to make it interesting, the only way we know how: by putting it in the mouths of attractive famous people. Here now: Ryan Gosling and Kate Upton explain the sequester.

The "rule number one of the web," according to Mashable, is "don't mess with the Oatmeal." Last week, Buzzfeed messed with the Oatmeal. Jack Stuef wrote a long post about the webcomic site, its creator Matt Inman, his background in shady SEO marketing, and his use of those same tactics in his comic business. In response, Inman posted an long, mostly handwritten response to his website, identifying one serious factual error and disputing several other contentions in the Buzzfeed piece. The internet was thrilled.

For the first time since it was introduced to penny candy customers in 1953, Bazooka bubblegum will have its packaging overhauled to do away with the familiar red, white and blue color scheme.

Male comedians are weird. They jerk off all the time, and then go on stage and talk about jerking off all the time, for money and laughs. But our nation's most hilarious stand-up comic and critically cherished sitcom auteur adds a thrilling twist to his onanistic escapades: He traps unsuspecting women in his hotel room and makes them stick around until he's done.

Kevin Keller, the popular new gay character in the Archie Comics universe, will soon be returning from war and getting married to a man in an offshoot series that envisions the Riverdale teens later in life. Will anyone object??

When Archie Comics, beloved manufacturers of American easiness, first introduced Kevin Keller, their first openly gay character, he was only supposed to be there for a short time. But now he's been called up to the big leagues!

From the people that brought you the Mark Zuckerberg comic book comes the boringly named (yet still enticing!) Steve Jobs: The Co-Founder of Apple, a pulp biography in pictures. [Gizmodo]

What better way to show your support for the San Francisco circumcision-ban ballot measure than by picking up a copy of "Foreskin Man No. 2," in which the suspiciously Aryan "intactivist" superhero battles "Monster Mohel"?

Stan Lee finally got around to answering the most urgent question in the Marvel fanboy canon, in a Q&A with Vanity Fair:

This fan-made trailer of the Archie comics brings to life the seedy underbelly of Riverdale high and unspoken issues in the comics. Jughead is gay?! Reggie's a cokehead?! Veronica is... well, we all knew Veronica was kind of a whore.

The Onion's A.V. Club has forthrightly apologized after discovering that one of their writers wrote a review of a book without reading it. Because it hadn't been published yet. How'd the writer manage to fool his editors? Watch and learn.

In your sunny Thursday media column: Howard Stern returns to Sirius, the NYT social media editor disappears, Brenda Starr dies, errors galore, and more!

BOOM! Studios has followed up on their insanely good Darkwing Duck comic book series with another old school Disney Afternoon favorite. In celebration of such a release here's a favorite Rescue Rangers episode from 1989.