What do you get when you take Heidi Montag and Ashley Dupre, combine them with former Real Housewife Danielle Staub, mix in Sopranos star Vincent Pastore, and top it off with a dash of Three 6 Mafia? You get the cast of VH1's new restaurant-themed reality show, Famous Food, which will undoubtedly reach trainwreck status within minutes when it premieres on Sunday. The show's extended trailer is above. [via VH1]

Given his well-documented affinity for NeNe Leakes, it should come as no surprise that Anderson Cooper is quite fond of Bravo's Real Housewives series, a fact he finally admitted this week. But even a superfan like Cooper had to acknowledge the tragedy that is Countess LuAnn de Lesseps' new music video, which—along with the other pop star wannabe Housewives—served as the subject of his "Ridiculist" segment on Wednesday night's AC360.

Lars von Trier is "doing [his] best" to satiate his leading lady's appetite for porn. Woody Allen says he wants to fuck all of his leading ladies. Zsa Zsa Gabor falls into a coma. Janice Dickinson loses her teeth. Thursday gossip takes a Nazi pervert at his word.

The troubled starlet is on the mend and sending the internet racy pictures of herself. The Situation sued his own father, Lindsay Lohan gets kicked out a party, Leonardo DiCaprio is dating a Gossip Girl. Tuesday's gossip just wants to relax on a beach somewhere.

Between Kim Zolciak, Countess Crackerjacks, and Danielle Staub, it's pretty hard to "drop" the worst single ever spawned from Bravo's metastasizing Real Housewives franchise. Leave it to Simon van Kempen, husband of Real Housewives of New York's Alex McCord, to take the cake with an astronomically bad creation.

The publisher and ghostwriter of Real Housewife of New Jersey Danielle Staub's memoir, The Naked Truth, are being sued by Staub's ex-husband, Kevin Maher. The lawsuit claims that Simon & Schuster and the author defamed Maher by calling him abusive.

Rejected Real Housewife of New Jersey Danielle Staub has a new video for her song "Cry." It's about being beaten by her man and walking out on him. Watching it is so bad it will give your psyche a shiner.

Sorry, no nude Emma Watson pics. Is The Situation's brother riding on his coattails? Lily Allen's in the hospital and Danielle Staub is dating a dude and a woman at the same time. Sunday Gossip Roundup does not disappoint.

The Jolie-Pitt brood begins school in a fortress of solitude in Budapest. Jennifer Aniston is the world's most eligible single lady. Chelsea Handler goes on a date with 50 Cent. Tuesday gossip is ready to mingle.

LiLo was "giggling" and downing Jack and Coke when she admitted to using drugs. Lady Gaga's meat dress gets made into jerky. Britney Spears buys a skateboard for her sons. Thursday gossip is totally saturated.

Tomorrow's episode of Maury features Real Housewives NeNe Leakes, Ramona Singer and Danielle Staub making over real-life housewives. Maury promoted this clip showing Danielle and Lori Michaels doing an acoustic MTV Unplugged style version of their single "Real Close."

In the middle of discussing her upcoming spin-off with The Daily Ten's Michael Yo, Danielle Staub suddenly leaps into a Hollywood Minute-esque format to fire parting shots at her former Real Housewives comrades.

Today at Gawker.TV, Tim Gunn is convinced that his father had an affair with J. Edgar Hoover, Danielle Staub parodies herself on The Dish, and Donald Trump spews his opinions on the Ground Zero Mosque during an Apprentice interview.

Now that Danielle Staub, of Real Housewives of New Jersey fame, has been fired from quit the show, many of us are left wondering what's next for the troubled woman. Never fear—she's got a new TV show planned.

Today at Gawker.TV, Danielle Staub tells the Early Show she's ready to fly solo, Joe Biden appeared on the Colbert Report, Tyra Banks' ANTM is back, and apparently Elijah Wood was the DJ at Stephen Moyer and Anna Paquin's wedding.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey star went on the CBS Early Show to discuss her terms of leaving the show, what her prolonged hug with Teresa meant, and that there are "firm offers" for her own show.

Has Momsen finally crossed over from "teen angst" to "budding serial killer"? Dennis Rodman's six-woman orgy caught on live microphone. Danielle Staub says Teresa is hairy as an ape. Wednesday's gossip will make you recoil in horror.

Well, that was that. We are done now. All have spoken their piece, all have hugged and wept and screamed, and now we are done. Let's peer at the rubble and see what we can make of it all.

So last night began our two-part journey into Andy Cohen's underworld, a place of shadows and screams, of strange rhombus coffee tables and tearing, thrashing ghouls. Andy Cohen's underworld is located at the Borgata in Atlantic City, naturally.

Well, that's it! No more. No more Housewives for the rest of our lives. Well, until Thursday, when the D.C. Devils once again crawl out of that fissure to Hell. And, also, until next week when the two-part reunion begins.