Summer's here! Are you fretting that there's nothing on television? Well, stop living in the past! We don't live in a school-year-dictated world anymore. Here are some shows you should consider watching to help pass the hot months, safely indoors.

Not only doesn't she wear deodorant, but usually skips panties too. This tweener is tweeking on drugs and this singer is cheating. Why can't they all be like this actress who did a selfless deed?

The civil rights crusaders at Spike are empowering little people worldwide with its newest show. "Half-pint Brawlers" is a reality series about dwarf professional wrestlers, and it will undoubtedly some day be seen as the little person's own Negro League.

Fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern called this morning and said she couldn't write about The City. Something to do with prostitution charges and Tom Arnold. Anyway, you're stuck with me, and I actually had to watch the show.

In warfare, having the psychological advantage is often more important than having a tactical edge. That's the lesson we learned when everyone on Glee worked through their depression by destroying each other. And singing! It was glorious.

Well, he's going to be pretty soon at least. Also today: A Chinese remake of a bad American movie, an NBC reality show that feels unnecessary, Dustin Lance Black is going to direct a movie, and more Tilda casting.

This time, she may call it quits. Not so for the wife of this actor, who seems to tolerate his cheating. Another actor sent his brother away so his penchant for underage conquests won't ruin his career. Oh, brotherly love.

Last night we saw a charity event for a sick baby and — WHO CARES ABOUT A SICK BABY!!! It's Danielle time! Everyone look at Danielle! Yayyyyy Danielle.

A dull Memorial Day weekend left two debuts struggling with, and ultimately losing to, a sophomore movie. That's not something that usually happens over the big moviegoing holidays, but it's 2010, and 2010 is a crazy year.

She gives a whole new meaning to using protection. This star is faking a pregnancy for attention, a reality star flashed the world, and two actresses pulled the "don't you know who I am?" Sadly, we do.

Due to production delays, Director Guillermo del Toro (Pan's Labyrinth) won't direct the two-part film adaptation of The Hobbit. He'll still co-write the script with Peter Jackson, but we had high hopes for del Toro's Middle Earth. Oh well. [AP]

She only leaves the house to get spotted with her kids. This actress got pregnant so her famous husband would stay closeted and a singer keeps his nanny from seeing her own baby. Please, someone, think of the children.

Michael Bay has a winning formula: Boobs + explosions = $$$. A while back he made a hilarious, action-packed ad for Victoria's Secret. Now he's hired one of the ad's stars to replace Megan Fox in Transformers 3.

No more! There will be no more Idol ever again. Well, not as we know it, anyway. Simon Cowell packed up his boxes last night and, after great fanfare, exited the Thunderdome. Let's do a post-mortem, shall we?

Loving Twilight is one thing, but she's actually drinking blood. This cheating actor is lying to his spouse (don't they all) and this talk show host berates her husband publicly (don't they all). Get the garlic and holy water!

And yet here she is trying, in a trailer for Life As We Know It, which might as well be called Baby Boom 2: Everything's Awful. At least the wildly charismatic Josh Duhamel is there to spice things up. Sigh.

Oh, no, sorry not Nikki Finke. "Tilda," the Hollywood blogger character on HBO's new show. Also today: the Logan's Run remake passes its Carousel, Jesse Eisenberg lands another role, and a new teen comedy could be good or awful.

We were too busy reading old magazines and dusting off our summer clothes to bother watching The City last night. Instead, fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern is going to tell you what you missed. There were parties, and Neel Shah!

Well, that was that. The last time that an American Idol Season 9 contestant will sing for sweet, sweet survival votes. How do you feel? Sad? Happy? Relieved? Drunk? Mostly I feel all those things. Come, let's discuss.

The much-hyped Lady Gaga episode of Glee ended up not being so much about Lady Gaga as it was about mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, friends and lovers, and a diversion through the KISS songbook. It was still awesome.