Today, People has revealed that Kate Hudson will appear as the cover girl for their 2008 Most Beautiful People issue, and we'd certainly like to send out a hearty congrats to the recently divorced single mom who's currently nursing Owen Wilson back to health. But after taking a look back at the list of stars who've previously nabbed the annual issue's cover spot, we fear there may be a curse accompanying the glossy honor. Sure, Leonardo DiCaprio (1998) and Julia Roberts (2000, 2005) haven't slipped up since having their smiley visage top the list, but a sizeable chunk of the winning alumni eerily saw their public and private lives undergo a downward spiral following their appearance on the issue's cover. We took a closer look at the possible curse-laden honor after the jump:

Anyone who saw his appearance on Ellen today knows that Thomas Haden Church is a real laugh riot. Just ask Thomas Haden Church. His favorite joke? Showing his dick to people. After flashing his junk on the set of Sideways — not exactly the indie version of Porky's — the numbnuts mechanic from Wings decided the best way to keep his second chance at success going was to flash another cast and crew. On the set of his new film Smart People (which, judging from the preview, looks too dumb for smart people and too boring for dumb people) Church once again showed off his junk. "Dennis and the cameraman enjoyed that... Dennis whirled in disgust and left the set." Perhaps it is the belief that a successful joke clears the room which makes Church leave his "sticky fruits flopping around" all the time. Or maybe a better explanation can be found in the actor's own initials, THC. We're just saying... [Contact Music]

Some developments in the Dennis Quaid twins overdose nightmare: While it seems like his newborns will be fine, the actor and his wife are suing Baxter Healthcare Corp., makers of the blood-thinning drug Heparin, in the hopes that it will force the company to stop packaging differing doses in identical vials. [THR/AP]

More on that uplifting story about a Heparin overdose administered by accident to Dennis Quaid's newborn twins at Cedars Sinai. (We thought that massive Star of David on top of the hospital was supposed to ward off such mishaps. Time to wrap the whole building in 45 miles of red string.) "Thomas Boone and Zoe Grace are in stable condition. But a well-placed source at Cedars tells us they are 'still very concerned because of the bleed out,' adding they won't know for another week if the mistake will cause 'longterm effects.'" [TMZ]

• Despite their matching dice tattoos, model-heiress Lydia Hearst claims she and testes-elephantiasis sufferer Cisco Adler are not, like, a thing. [Page Six]
  

Dennis Quaid's newborn twins have reportedly been given a dose of 1000 times too much of the blood-thinning drug Heparin at Cedars Sinai (along with 13 other patients) after a mix-up over where the drug is typically stored. [TMZ]

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time you spotted Dave Matthews succumbing to the Sprinkles scourge.

The Smoking Gun reprints the production riders for several celebrity rock bands, detailing their (frankly boring) backstage catering needs: Everything from His Royal Whoaness Keanu Reeves' very wholesome Dogstar demands ("1 large pot of hot soup (vegetable or chicken)"), Jared Leto's fat-making tricks of the trade ("Take-out food for ten (10) people...Taco Bell, pizza are fine."), and manorexia survivor Dennis Quaid's calorie-deficient suggestions for his band The Sharks ("Assorted Herbal Teas...Hot Water..."). We were shocked, however, to read that the Steven Seagal Band rider requested "36 cans of Red Bull." If Seagal can't force his own band to enjoy the peppy refreshment of Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt, how can he expect any of us to become loyal customers of his own branded energy beverage?

Dennis Quaid has hopped right onto Teri Hatcher's confessional bandwagon, telling a fitness magazine of his shameful struggle in the mid 90s with male anorexia, Page Six reports:

Anyone who sat through last night's Golden Globes telecast felt crippling, vicarious embarrassment on behalf of presenter Dennis Quaid, whose soon-to-be infamous "chick flick" joke will surely go down in the storied history of awards show misfires. Our transcription of Quaid's doomed introduction of Brokeback Mountain: