It's not a good sign for your experiment in reshaping the face of network programming when the experiment's centerpiece muses aloud that, yeah, maybe things were better the way they were before.

Some celestial beings sure are kicking the shit out of earth. First the Samoan rumbles, then the quakes in Indonesia and Italy. Now the South Pacific and Bali Ha'i have been hit. Whatever you're doing, silly humans, stop. [CNN]

Pieces are falling off a building on Broadway and Houston St. What up today, NYC?

What exactly happened on the L train—NYC's most cool subway line—today? Earlier we heard rumors of a suicide. We got a bunch of tips. And just before we went to put up this post, we saw this.

At least 200 450 are dead after a 7.6 magnitude earthquake struck Indonesia.

This is too bad: at least 34 people are dead after an 8.0 underwater earthquake spawned monstrous waves that struck Samoa and American Samoa. Hawaii's shitting its pants because authorities worry water will head their way. We would, too. [MSNBC]

Clearly, the online ad market is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions. Old Testament, wrath of God type stuff: Dogster and LOLcats-based I Can Has Cheezburger are now selling ads together, per a new agreement. Next up: Mass hysteria.

As you all know, we've just concluded the opening weekend of Tucker Max's film debut, "Alcohol and Poop Go Together Like Whores and EZ Cheez." How grand a mark has it made on cinema history? Let's go to the scorecards!

"The Moscow News: Things hard to explain, in a language you understand." Mmm hmm. Since this apparently didn't sink in last week: No. [Adfreak]

California's wildfires more than doubled in size in less than 24-hours.

Southern California's on fire (again), and residents are told to evacuate — or burn trying.

Brazilian police believe someone — or someones — have poisoned 63 animals this year.

Google's London office building briefly caught on fire, and there's a very good chance you heard about it, because internet geeks are great at instantly broadcasting images of flames, globally. If only they were as good at igniting grills.

This little monkey, Spindler, has three parents. That's right! Three! How could this be? Because scientists are trying to play God and help eradicate potentially fatal diseases. Those bastards!

Since way back in 1993, when the movie adaptation of Jurassic Park came out, we knew the popularization of Michael Crichton's dinosaur nightmare novel would be the end of us. Well, that prediction seems frighteningly close to fruition.

Five hundred dead! Where were you when the Central Park Treepocalypse happened?

A Flickr user is complaining loudly that the photo service allowed 3,000+ of his photos to be deleted by a hacker with no warning. Now they're supposedly gone, forever. When will Flickr start making backups?

The best they could do:

The Way We Live Now: Suffering in relativity. Allen Stanford has no air conditioning. Haitian boat people are drowning. Baghdad security guards are getting killed. And back in Queens, we're barely scraping by, workin' in the Yak shop.

Facebook is quite powerful at lubricating relationships between acquaintances. Too powerful, sometimes: the social network turned an English garden party into a riot requiring a small police army to put down.