dorks

Hamilton Nolan · 08/26/15 03:23PM

“They packed the bowl of the pipe (the terminology of which I found on reddit), and showed me how to smoke it properly.” America’s least cool 23-year-old tries weed (slang for marijuana).

Sport Coats and Jeans: Not Okay

Hamilton Nolan · 11/20/13 11:21AM

Men wearing sport coats and jeans: no. You want to be formal? Fine, wear a sport coat. You want to be casual? Fine, wear jeans. Pick one, and stand by your choice—Like A Real Man.

Here's Video Footage of Colin Powell Dork-Dancing To Daft Punk

Camille Dodero · 08/26/13 06:30PM

As if these photos of Colin Powell cutting a rug—pursed lips conveying his boogie-woogie seriousness in one; hands-on-hips stance indicating he may be contemplating a hernia-inducing squat dance in another—weren't uncomfortable enough, now we have approximately 20 digital-video seconds of the former secretary of state grooving out to a Daft Punk song about staying up all night for the nookie. Also, included: Pharrell's croon, Katie Holmes Doing the Shoulders, and a full-club karaoke singalong. The Hamptons will embarrass you every time.

Rick Santorum Raising Money Off of His 'Google Problem'

Jim Newell · 07/20/11 03:08PM

Rick Santorum has long struggled with his "Google problem," in which the first result of a "rick santorum" search defines "Santorum" as a filthy anal sex byproduct. This has been the case since gay activist and columnist Dan Savage coordinated a successful Google bomb in 2003. But Santorum finally appears to have accepted his fate as a search engine joke, and is now trying to raise cash off of it.

Brooks Brothers Inadvertently Reveals America's Whitest Colleges

Hamilton Nolan · 06/27/11 02:21PM

Brooks Brothers does not make the type of "College apparel" worn by Southeastern Conference country animals on "game day" that serves as little more than a bib for copious amounts of spilled beer and barbecue sauce. That is not what Brooks Brothers does. Brooks Brothers makes dignified casual apparel for American winners.

Nerds Scam Bookstores with Crank-Call Hoaxes

Sheila · 04/30/08 12:57PM

Hucksters are calling bookstores, pretending to be authors, and then hitting them up for money, reports the LA Times. For example, someone might impersonate an author that will be reading at the store in a few days, asking for cash to get his car out of the impound lot. Big-hearted bookstore employees have fallen for the scams a few times, but no more: "They draw you in, and later you just feel so foolish."

Wal-Mart Fits Right In To Dork-Filled Blogosphere

Hamilton Nolan · 03/03/08 11:21AM

First, Wal-Mart tried to endear themselves to the online world with a thoroughly corporate website full of "Facts." Then, they tried a fake, secretly corporate-sponsored blog. Now, it looks like they've learned their lesson about openness and disclosure; they've started an (apparently) uncensored corporate blog that proves once and for all that free speech is nothing to be scared of, because even high-level Wal-Mart employees are just as gee-whiz predictable and goofy as you would have imagined. Evidence of the fundamental nerdiness of the corporate steamroller—and a fun quiz!—after the jump.