Ah, there's nothing we enjoy more than emails promoting pretentious, bottle-service parties that also include some political commentary (bold added):

Presented without comment, the email Radar assistant editor Jed Heyman sent this afternoon to his fellow 2004 alumni of the Columbia Publishing Course:

When one sends an email off to a vast, semi-faceless organization, one expects a certain sort of a response (to the very limited extent one even bothers to expect a response at all). From some places — oh, say, us — you wouldn't be astonished to receive a raunchy and expletive-laden reply. From most organizations, though, you'd expect something fairly tame. And the Oxford dictionary folks seem to fall squarely into the latter camp.

Defying all the commercialism and profit the holidays have come to mean, retailer J.Crew boldly smacks the season with a subversive reality check. And so many a sporty WASP-wannabe is left in a harrowing pit of confusion — and, worse, a stalled state of spending.

You have no idea the opportunities in life that are closed to you when people mistakenly think you're the daughter of a multimillionaire developer and newspaper publisher. There are so many perks — so many interesting people to meet, so many freebies to be snagged — that are available to average folks like us but suddenly become off-limits when people think you're boldface spawn. And so we can understand why New York magazine contributing writer Alicia Zuckerman felt compelled to send this email to her colleagues today:

The oddest emails keep getting forwarded to us today. Especially this one:

Email accounts around Manhattan — including ours — are receiving this important message today. It's full of barely repressed rage, just-offstage drama, and allusions to hijinks so debauched they cannot be mentioned.

We know what happens if we go to Google, type "failure," and click "I'm feeling lucky." It's the same thing that would have happened if we did that at any point in the last few years. It's not new, your friend wasn't the first to discover it, and, no, we don't need to act quickly before Google "fixes" it. (First Nexis mention: December 2003, in The Washington Post.) We understand you mean well, but, please, stop emailing about it.

A recent vacation autoreply on Page Sixer Fernando Gil's email, which showed up in our inbox today:

Favorite 4 Times Square Mole reports this morning that Conde Nast's management might well have achieved its real goal: Not so much ridding the company of Andrew Krucoff as scaring the bejesus out of its remaining employees. F4TSM emails:

Ah, the good ol' Department of Homeland Security:

We find most newfangled warning labels ridiculous — yes, a plastic bag is not a toy; no, you shouldn't use the hairdryer in the bathtub; TV-MA-VSL means, well, what? But here's a warning trend we can get behind: Obnoxious, gratuitous emailers pre-announcing their incoherent rants.