The big problem with Facebook stalking is that it takes so much work. Which is why we're so excited for "Breakup Notifier," programmer Dan Loewenherz's new Facebook app for the lazy stalker. Just sign into the app with your Facebook account and choose a group of "taken" friends. Now, whenever those friends change their relationship statuses, the app will email you—freeing you up for stuff like standing outside peoples' windows, and stealing bits of their hair for your special doll. [Breakup Notifier via Reddit; image via Shutterstock]

An Egyptian man who wanted to show his gratitude to Facebook for its role in the January 25 protests has named his baby Facebook. Here's the article from the Egyptian paper Al-Ahram, as translated by TechCrunch:

Why does Facebook hate the human body? It allows no nude pictures; porn stars are chased off the site simply for being porn stars. Even works of art that feature unclothed private parts fall before Facebook's puritanical policies.

Today Facebook added "in a civil union" and "in a domestic partnership" to its array of relationship statuses that already include "single," "married," and the ever popular "it's complicated." Personally I'm waiting until they add "in a throuple."

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg is going to meet Barack Obama in San Francisco next week, along with other "business leaders in technology and business." Would love to be a fly on the wall in that room. Obama has a sort of complicated relationship with Facebook! On the one hand, college students clicking "like" got him elected in 2008. And Zuckerberg is running a successful business, which Obama likes, even if Facebook probably creates a net-loss in GDP due to hours wasted on Farmville.

Hey! Looks like exploiting the weaknesses of addicts and kids does pay off: Investors are considering pouring another $250 million into gaming company Zynga, Inc. "in a deal that could value the three-year-old start-up at between $7 billion and $9 billion," according to The Wall Street Journal. That's right, the company behind Farmville is worth—according to always-rational investors—seven billion dollars. Time to short the human race. [WSJ]

19 year-old Corey Christian Adams raped a girl in West Chester, Pennyslvania while she was blackout drunk. When she called him up and confronted him about it afterwards, he post a Facebook status update asking for help dealing with his victim: "I got 500 on a girls head who wants that bread? Hit me up anyway possible." After police confronted him about the allegations, he wrote another post saying that he "needed this girl knocked off right now."

We don't think Mark Zuckerberg or Facebook deserve any thanks for their role in Egypt's protests—given that role consisted mainly of kicking activists off Facebook for using pseudonyms. But Wael Ghonim, the Google engineer who was kidnapped by the regime and has become the youthful face of the protests, wants to personally thank Zuckerberg:

A South Carolina lawmaker has introduced a bill that would put prisoners caught using Facebook in solitary confinement and slap them with a $500 fine. But the party pics are so good from the inside!

According to the Wall Street Journal, both Google and Facebook have been in "low-level" talks to buy Twitter. As long as it keeps them from making some new dumb social-networking thing, we're all for it.

The Syrian government apparently unbanned Facebook and YouTube on Tuesday, five years after those and other social networking sites were blocked nationwide. (Not that the ban had stopped anyone—both sites "are popular across the country" and accessed through anonymous proxy servers. You can't stop viral videos, guys!) So far, Syrian attempts at generating protests on the same scale as those in Egypt and Tunisia have failed, and it'll be interesting to see if a more easily-accessible internet will facilitate anti-government activity, or just get everyone hooked on Farmville. [Guardian]

Facebook announced it will move to new offices nearly seven times the size of its current headquarters. Someone is planning on conquering the world, clearly.

Just when you thought the Winklevoss twins' jihad against Facebook couldn't get more ridiculous, they give an aggressively homoerotic video interview to The Daily. Watch the Teutonic twins pump iron, flex butt cheeks, and flaunt nipples to an action movie soundtrack.

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has taken out a restraining order against an alleged stalker, a 31-year-old man named Pradeep Manukonda, who's apparently been sending Zuckerberg "threatening" messages through (where else?) Facebook.

On Super Bowl Sunday, consumers are bombarded with highly produced television advertisements. Many get lost in the shuffle. This ad for the Chevy Cruze, which offers real-time Facebook status updates via OnStar, stood out—for all the wrong reasons.

An image making the rounds features an Egyptian protester carrying a sign that reads "Thank you Facebook" in Arabic. Thanks for what? Facebook has done as little as possible to help Egypt's protesters. It should do more.

Congress, having discovered Facebook last year, can't get enough of asking Mark Zuckerberg questions about its privacy policies. They just sent him a letter grilling him about Facebook's plan to give third-party developers access to more user data.

A couple of artists have created a fake 'dating site' by scraping 250,000 Facebook profiles without Facebook's permission. Lovely-faces.com is your source for gawking at strangers who haven't adjusted their Facebook privacy settings!

Dave Morin is among the luckiest guys in Silicon Valley. After a stint as an Apple college rep, he joined Facebook right before it blew up. Then Google offered $100 million for his obscure startup—and Morin rejected it.

Thought you had seen every parody of the Old Spice commercial? Think again! This Facebook related parody will shame every status you have ever posted. Warning: following these instructions will make you look like an pompous twat.