After Donald Trump compared it to a “war zone” on Tuesday, the city of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, joined the parents of a dead soldier, our country’s fire marshals, Paul Ryan and a human baby as the most recent addition to Donald Trump’s ever-growing list of mortal enemies.

“ALEX JONES: BECK IS A ‘DEMONIC LITTLE GOBLIN’ ‘RUBBING HIS LITTLE POT BELLY ON THE GROUND’ BEFORE ZUCKERBERG,” reads a strange and vivid headline that appeared on Breitbart this week, the latest volley in a war of words between the two most prominent broadcasters of news and opinion for Americans who own a gun and 50 or more bumper stickers.

Vice President Joe Biden, a man for whom every day is a living nightmare in which he is not running for president, dissed Hillary Clinton on CNN last night. Clinton is “relatively new” to engaging with income inequality, he said, while rival Bernie Sanders “has credibility” on the issue. Oh damn.

As a connoisseur of fine yogurt, you can approach life in one of two ways: get bogged down in the muck of inferior yogurt trench warfare, or you can put on your headphones and settle in with some quality yogurt—because brother, life is too short for bad curdles.

A battle between a Buzzfeed reporter and DeAndre Cortez Way, the rapper better known as Soulja Boy, is brewing over privacy, fraud, and, of course, hoverboards.

Should the published writing of professional writers be subject to any criticism? I believe yes. At least one professional writer disagrees.

The A-list cause du jour—the boycott of one Dolce & Gabbana international house of fashion, thanks to one of the designer's statements on gay adoption—is devolving into a hilariously arch Twitter flame war.

"They say on the Internet / There are no neutrals there / You'll either be on Spotify / Or on Google's new Music Key streaming service." In the Taylor Swift vs. Billy Bragg fight, which side are you on?

Glee "star" Naya Rivera posted a straight-up rude comment on Kim Kardashian's Instagram of her bare-ass Paper cover on Tuesday. She is not sorry for that comment.

Last week, athlete-turned-golfer Michael Jordan impugned the ball-whacking abilities of the President of these United States, calling Barack Obama "a shitty golfer." And Jordan knows whereof he speaks: His handicap of 3 is much smaller and better than Obama's 17. Statistics!

Did you hear? America's favorite boobs—those belonging to Katy Perry—are performing at the Super Bowl XLVIV Halftime Show. Did you also hear? Taylor Swift, b. 1989, hates those boobs. So naturally, Radar reports, Tayla is gonna destroy the halftime show.

On the road to promote her upcoming album Nostalgia, Annie Lennox has tried, it seems, to start something with Beyoncé. Sure, why not? Last month, she called Bey "feminist lite," and in an interview with NPR's Steve Inskeep yesterday, she clarified, "twerking is not feminism."

Fresh off wishing Ebola on a photographer, Iggy Azalea has embroiled herself in a feud with someone closer to her own size—Snoop Dogg. She called him an "ass" on Twitter after Snoop, a mean girl, posted an Instagram calling her ugly. What a world.

Like a cranberry scone baked with nails and broken glass and wood splinters that Taylor Swift has just handed to you, Rolling Stone's new profile of Taylor Swift was chock full of surprises:

Freddie Prinze Jr., star of movies that seem to always air on cable at weird hours, decided it was high time to tell us all about his terrible, career-upending experience of working with Kiefer Sutherland on season eight of 24. "Kiefer was the most unprofessional dude in the world. That's not me talking trash, I'd say it to his face, I think everyone that's worked with him has said that," Prinze told ABC News.

Okay—so it says here that skyr from Iceland thinks it is going to be the next big yogurt? Oh please—yeah right. Good luck—go fuck yourselves.

Amazon, the Cthulhu of retail, finds itself embroiled in a spat with a major book publisher. It's gotten nasty. And, remarkably, Amazon is losing the PR battle. Why? Perhaps because Amazon—where workers are "ground into a tired heap"—deserves to have a bad reputation.

Justin Bieber's a piece of shit, that's Seth Rogen's story and he's sticking to it. Earlier on the Today show, he told Matt Lauer, "None of these people in this room like Justin Bieber. I can guarantee you that...I don't know anybody who likes Justin Bieber."

A wealthy Texas restaurateur was arrested twice in three days for terrorizing the staff of a winery he used to own with a golf cart, a knife, and a hammer.

Few graphic-design institutions are (or were) as highly regarded as Hoefler & Frere-Jones, a small New York City type foundry whose perfectly crafted typefaces—including Gotham, Whitney, and Champion—saturate media, advertising, entertainment, and politics. Obama tapped the company to create a custom font for his second presidential campaign. Now the two sides of the ampersand are at war over who actually owns the company.