Cowboys are Gay and it's OK: Brokeback Mountain leads the Oscar nominee list with 8 nods. Right after noms were announced, Matt Dillon hit the Today show — he's just been nominated, and Katie Couric is flashing some congratulatory leg.
• American Idol Clay Aiken engaging in hot homo sex with a former Green Beret? Golly, we can't imagine. Actually, we can — but only if Clay bottomed. [Page Six]
• And there's this detailed description of said hot homo sex, which will make the Claymates either cry or masturbate. [R&M]
• Jessica Simpson engages in assplay with Maroon 5 lead singer Adam Levine; the girl just can't stay away from metrosexual pop boys, can she? [Page Six]
• For the inevitable Arianna Huffington-Tim Russert cage match, we'll be putting our money on Huffington. Her well-manicured nails would easily pierce Russert's tender, puffy flesh. [Lowdown]
• Nicole Kidman's engagement ring isn't really that pretty. We always thought she was more of a classic setting, brilliant-cut type of girl. [OAN]
• Best. Headline. Ever: "Hilton Publicists Fight Paris Peeing Claims." Do you even need the accompanying story? Oh, hell yes, you do. A Maui taxi driver claims that heiress was so drunk she pissed herself in the cab, creating a mess the driver was then forced to mop up with a towel. Of course, he has the towel and plans to using her DNA to prove his claim. We can't wait 'til we have the chance to buy that very towel on eBay. [WENN]
• Meg Ryan adopts a Chinese baby, names him Naddox, and hopes for a career miracle. [IMDb]
• Desperate to be remembered for something more than "Hey Ma," rapper Cam'ron releases an eight minute dis on Def Jam chair and professional Hova Jay-Z. [R&M]
• Sony Corp. chief Sir Howard Stringer tells bad jokes; Lloyd Grove dutifully transcribes. [Lowdown]
• Chef Rocco DiSpirito isn't gay. He just hangs with lap-dancing trannies. [Page Six]
Who knew so many of you speak Swedish? After something like 472 emails, we have a pretty good handle on what our boy Freddy was saying in his gay Swedish personal. First, and most important, sambo there apparently means something very different than sambo here. (In Sweden, it seems, it means living together.) Here's the full translation, from one emailer:
So what happens when you've been thoroughly trounced for mayor of New York City? If we didn't know better, we'd think that vanquished Democrat Fernando Ferrer has taken his moustache and moved to Sweden. We speak no Swedish, but, if we're interpreting correctly, it certainly seems that the dashing photo at right is in some sort of Saab-loving singles ad. (The pic — of one "Fernando Ferrer" — took up nearly a full page of QX, Sweden's leading gay monthly.) Ferrer's full blurb is below, and we bet it'd be truly hilarious if we understood what it meant.
Among our many problems in life, two of the biggest are these: We are not very good interviewers, and we are not very good gays. Tonight, it seems, we shall have a chance to work on both problems — and, even better, with drinks!
• On the website for NBC's The Office, there's a cutesy little feature which allows users to upload original photos documenting their own office torture sessions. Someone posted the picture at right with the following caption: "Art Director of a major magazine busy at work with some fashion samples for Holiday Gift Guide." Alright, kittens, IDENTIFY THIS MAN. Who is he? We know you know! [The Office]
• It was inevitable: James Frey faces a class-action lawsuit regarding the false claims in A Million Little Pieces. [HND]
• Urban Outfitters liked online retailer Johnny Cupcake's t-shirt designs, so they asked for a sample to be considered for placement with the retailer. For whatever reason, a deal wasn't worked out — presumably because Urban realized they could save cash by stealing the designs and making the t-shirts themselves. [Consumerist]
• What does your H&M location say about you? Personally, ours says "poor and desperate." [VV via Curbed]
• How to write Gay. [MBToolbox]
Today's New York Social Diary exists solely to pay reverence to the set's most polished poufs, Andrew Saffir and Daniel Benedict (you can call them "AND," darling). Together for the past 8 years, AND flit about Manhattan, the Hamptons and Palm Beach, sharing their love of bespoke suits, Greta Garbo, and scented candles with their many friends.
• As a semi-anonymous blogger, there are plenty of ways to "out" yourself. Doing so by letting the Post profile you as a Dinner Whore — a single woman who casually goes on expensive dinner dates with anyone who can pay for a gourmet meal — is not, perhaps, the best option. We liked you better when we didn't know who you were and what you were up to. [NYP]
• While we've had some miserable professional duties in our time (latte-fetching and call-rolling come to mind), none compare to that of an intern asked to walk a wintery 25 blocks to deliver a box of knishes to Lizzie Grubman's family on the night of her prison release. [VV]
• Has the Daily News caught our libidinous affliction for Anderson Cooper? In a piece on newsmen with gray hair, they call the "trend" the Anderson Effect. Christ, even we'd just call gray hair "old." [NYDN]
• So does this mean that nasty anonymous commenters can be prosecuted for blog-harassment? [Rational Rants]
• As soon as celebrities start flaunting their 8-balls, maybe fairy dust will become as socially acceptable as leafy greens. [CityRag]
• Speaking of blow, if you were a dealer selling to Lohan, would you write about it on a message board? Actually, we bet you would. [Crewcial]
• Why it's better to be Gay. [Genre]
• Related: Sony launches a Gay record label. So, uh, Liza reissues? Madonna mixes? Terrible techno for your methed up night at the Pines party? [Reuters]
• Times foodie Frank Bruni's cutting investigation into restaurants discovers the unthinkable: you will spend money, often more than you originally intended. We're grabbing a Pulitzer nomination form right now. [NYT]
• Perhaps The Source should have gone looking for a new accounts manager before their landlord booted their broke asses. [MB]
• A very odd and possibly sad sighting of Radar's widower Maer Roshan. [PX This]
• Former councilwoman Margarita Lopez crowns Mayor Bloomberg an "honorary lesbian." We always knew he had a little bulldyke in him. [Politicker]
• Yet another theory on James Frey's FTBSITTTD tattoo, this one with as powerful a message as they come. [TMN]
• Our society has finally come to the point where a young, helpless woman will sacrifice her ladyflower for a fucking videogame system. Score one for those Left Behind-type freaks. [Craigslist]
We try to ignore Lisa and Brittny Gastineau, stars of E! Gastineau Girls — we're already obsessed with too many rich-for-no-reason, famous-for-no-reason types and haven't the room on our roster for another pair of mindless balloon-girls. Nevertheless, two interesting tips sauntered their way into our mailbox over the weekend, and we're compelled to share them as COMPLETELY UNSUBSTANTIATED but TOTALLY INTERESTING information:
• Morgan Stanley boots 4 employees after they accompanied clients to a strip club. Apparently this touches on Morgan Stanley's touchy gender discrimination issues, but we find it just as offensive to assume a female staffer wouldn't want to take the high rollers to Scores. [Wall Street Folly]
• After three years of delightly offensive and brilliantly entertaining pro bono work, the Black Table throws in the towel and heads to rehab. [Black Table]
• Are they Yindies? Yupsters? Or just annoying fuckwit posers? [LA Weekly & Newsweek]
• A reasonably kind rationalization of your Life & Style habit, courtesy of Salon. [Salon]
• Slightly more pleasant than chugging glasses of Airborne. [Female First]
• Supermodel Kate Moss, always the bravest girl in Bolivia, agrees to return to London to speak with authorities about that whole cocaine thing. [Telegraph]
• Happy New Year, John Norris. You're gonna need it. [MisShapes]
• We may not LURVE New York's 101 restaurants, but we certainly wouldn't rather watch an episode of 2 and a Half Men instead. That's just crazy talk. [PDHyman]
• Club kid killer Michael Alig is baaack! [WOW]
• You can jack the price of hooch up all you want; it's not going to stop a single person from getting hammered at brunch. [Reuters]
• Get more for your money at Starbucks. [Slate]
• McSweeney's grows a precious new tentacle called Wholpin, for DVDphiles. [Cool Hunting]
• Is there any limit to the fun we can have at Tara Reid's expense? [Gallery of the Absurd]
Because the AIDS awareness and advocacy campaigns have gotten a little stale (Elijah Wood and duct tape? So 1994 snuff — yawn!), the AIDS Healthcare Foundation has decided to create a minor controversy by throwing a hissy-fit over a Pfizer print ad for Viagra. The foundation, which is the largest advocacy group in the country, claims an advertisement for the boner-maker "encourages the use of Viagra as a party drug" and thus contributes to the spread of itchy crotch and other sexually transmitted diseases.
• Mike Myers and his wife of the past 12 years, Robin Ruzan (whose Jewish mother was the inspiration behind Myers' Linda Richman character on Saturday Night Live), have filed for divorce. What went wrong? By using the clues in Gawker Stalker, you can piece together the decline of a marriage and the rise of an alcoholic. Which is exactly what we designed the feature for. [The Apiary]
• A court has lifted a Santa Fe woman's restraining order against David Letterman, who, she claims, used code words during his show to give her instructions on how to eat crayons and wear tinfoil hats. [AP]
• When bloggers turn unreasonably nasty on commonfolk, nobody wins. It's akin to cannibalism, snarking on one's own kind. [Perez Hilton]
• Yes, we know that horsey 90210 alum Tori Spelling is engaged to a new beau, despite being not yet divorced from her ex-husband. May her new man enjoy riding her around the Spelling mansion. [Us Weekly]
• Patrick Swayze is delving into hip-hop, using "rap rhythms as an emotional undercurrent for ballads." We always felt Dirty Dancing would be profoundly improved with the addition of gold teeth and bitches. [AllHipHop]
• You may consider yourself a gay wino, but are you gay and drunk enough to own a collectible bottle of Madonna's "Confessions on a Dance Floor" wine? [Celebrity Cellars]
• A new sense of pity for Women's Wear Daily reporter Jacob Bernstein, whose mother Nora Ephron will never be happy until her baby boy finds her a cabbage strudel. [NYT]
• Bikini-clad Ricky Martin and his friend aren't gay. They just fuck like they are. [Dlisted]
• Now that Peter Braunstein has been caught, we can go back to freely discussing pantyhose. [Slate]
• Federal anti-terror funds pay for faux-fancy Circle Line dinner cruises. Terrorists do balk at the sight of old white people wearing Sperry Top-Siders. [NYP]
• The year in crappy celebrity wrist watches. [OAN]
• The year in odd news. [MSNBC]
• The year in random freelancers who happen to appear on Jeopardy. [FishbowlNY]
• Get the cool gadget and games your relatives didn't get you for Christmas or Hanukkah with Gizmodo and Kotaku's holiday gift guides. Click on the Best of the Year polls to choose the top gadget and game of the year, and maybe score a $500 gift certificate. Get to it, nerds. [Gizmodo]
• And finally, we end on a very serious note: Kevin Federline has launched his own website. It is a thing of mysterious, painful beauty, built from the ashes of dead souls and flecked with the vomit of those who manage to survive its launch. [Kevin Federline]
• While you were limping up and down Broadway and losing digits to hypothermia, rest assured union leader Roger Toussaint was enjoying a leisurely two-hour meal with six cronies at a nice restaurant. Would you be any less livid if we noted the restaurant was in Harlem? Yeah, didn't think so. [Page Six]
• Last year, Lloyd Grove banished Paris Hilton from his column and went on the Today show to tell the world. This year, he's banishing Brad Pitt, but you won't see Lloyd on TV to talk about it — perhaps because he is making a very, very grave mistake. Put down the pipe, G, and get it together. [Lowdown]
• Don't get in a tizzy about OK! editor Sarah Ivens sucking face with ad exec Ben Kennedy — she's been separated from her husband since October. Suck freely, liberated lady! [Gatecrasher]
• Broke-ass Courtney Love is looking to sell the entire song catalogue of her late husband Kurt Cobain and Nirvana. Those of you still mentally stuck in Seattle circa 1993 are no doubt displeased. [Page Six]
• Elton John continues to call Madonna a miserable cow. You'd think legally sanctioned assfucking would mellow him out a bit, but you'd be wrong. [Scoop]
It's day three of the world's most goddamned annoying strike on earth, and everyone's beyond exhausted. Not content to let the Red Cross be the sole purveyor of goodwill, the fine folks at Craigslist (your Official Source for Fucked-Up Transit Strike Information©) are doing their part:
Our airsick bag-collecting brother at Gridskipper points us to a NY Observer story on the big acquisition of a 2000-acre plot of land in the Dominican Republic, financed by what could be the least masculine troupe of investors in history. The thin-wristed crew includes Newsweek International editor Fareed Zakaria, DJ-ing white vegan stain Moby, mimbo socialite Alex Von Furstenberg and bird-chested money manager Boykin Curry.
