A former aide says there's tape out there of John Edwards ridin' dirty! Jon Gosselin is enjoying his first few days of freedom, with frisbee! Elliot Spitzer thinks he's better than Mark Sanford. Presenting your politics-happy Sunday morning gossip roundup:

Can Farrah Fawcett's jailed son attend her funeral? Is Coolio's next fantastic voyage to jail? Does Johnny Depp watch his own movies? Will Real Housewives of Dirty Jerz (and Kelly Bensimon!) ever go away? How's Walter Cronkite? Let's find out:

Rumors of the Goldblum/Ford deaths were greatly exaggerated, David Gregory throws a hissy over Joe Scarborough, Kate Gosselin sports a bikini in the driveway, Kim Kardashian lusts for Megan Fox and Chris Brown and Rihanna want to touch.

Angelina threatens Jennifer for frequently texting Brad, Marlon Brando banged Jackie O twice, Lily Allen gets caught with coke in her nose, Victoria Beckham shows off her new rack and Katy Perry posts a nude pic with pizza on Twitter.

Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minillo bite the dust, Jon Gosselin's new girlfriend will be on the next season of J&K+8, Lindsay Lohan tries to pick up Justin Timberlake in a club and Megan Fox almost burns down a Louisiana town.

Farrah finally agrees to marry Ryan before she dies, FHM names Megan Fox the hottest woman in the universe, Paris Hilton finds a new animal to ride, Jake and Reese dress up alike and a Fox News divorce.

Megan Fox cites confusion in explaining away the infamous flower incident, Ryan Seacrest is developing a Lindsay Lohan reality show, Kate Moss is an absolute pain in the arse girlfriend, and Katie Lee Joel's new man is shagging fashion editors.

A child of Jon and Kate Gosselin is injured after an unsuccessful sacrificial offering to Nielsen gods by TLC. Madonna's child caper! Susan Boyle: distraught. Harry Potter and Radiohead? Yeezey's girlfriend! Presenting your Sunday morning gossip roundup. Happy Father's Day!

The infamous Vogue editrix loses her party planner, House as a tranny-nun, Governator Ahnold's real-life action sequence, a sad Hollywood divorce, midgets, gays, nerdy Jews, scary Americans, more Gossip Girl action, and Gary Busey. Presenting your Saturday morning Gossip Roundup:

Someone is shopping a tape of Leighton Meester boning an ex-boyfriend, Robert Pattinson gets hit by a cab, Jennifer Garner tries to breakup Ben Affleck and Kevin Smith, Susan Boyle goes bonkers again and Beyonce screws over a club owner.

Elle is letting LiLo off the hook over the jewels everyone seems convinced that she stole, two cops try to blackmail Sarah Jessica Parker/Matthew Broderick, Mariah Carey will star in a London play and Justin Timberlake loves tequila shots.

Jada Pinkett Smith says she and Will like to bang in other people's homes, Victoria Beckham has her third boob job, Nicole Ritchie breaks up Lohan and Ronson, Owen Wilson still loves Kate Hudson, and Judd Apatow sucks in bed.

The week she's starring in a blockbuster film release, nude photos of Megan Fox magically appear on the internet, Artie Lange is banned from the Tonight Show, Lindsay Lohan goes berserk in a club, and Paris dishes on boning Ronaldo.

Megan Fox affirms that she's single and looking, Sienna Miller claims to have never been on a date or had a one-night stand, Susan Boyle is suffering from exhaustion, and Jon and Kate celebrate their anniversary apart.

Susan Boyle's "exhausted" again, Dustin Lance Black's sorry, Cindy Adams knows where you should hide your cash, Prince Harry's dating a floozy, and Salman Rushdie's a third boob. Oh, and: Ron Burkle and whores. Here's your Sunday morning gossip roundup:

Kate Gosselin angrily eats a popsicle, inflating a Bounce House of Death. Susan Boyle's back, bitch! So is Britain-Bound Britney. And someone makes a dumb pun involving Paris Hilton and a hard-on. Presenting your Saturday morning gossip roundup:

Chris Brown and Rihanna attend Game 4 of the NBA Finals, Paris Hilton has a raunchy rebound hookup with soccer star Ronaldo, Paul Shaffer almost played George Costanza on Seinfeld, Megan Fox has genetically-deformed thumbs and Madonna adopts another African.

Paris Hilton dumps her toolish boyfriend, Shia LaBeouf issues a statement to let everyone know he's not boning his mother, Victoria Beckham's nipples tour London, Jessica Alba is under investigation for vandalism, and Jeremy Piven preaches about mercury poisoning.

Leo the Great dumped Bar Refaeli, Britney Spears is banging her agent at William Morris, Miley Cyrus dumped her boyfriend and is after Nick Jonas, Lauren Conrad's new novel will be horrendous, and David Carradine bought lots of sex toys.

Lindsay Lohan's stalking of Samantha Ronson brings them back together, Anne Hathaway prepares to play Judy Garland on Broadway, NBC denies the Speidi torture allegations, Susan Boyle seems to have found sanity, and the Gosselin's get investigated for animal abuse.