Good news in the losing battle against America's obesity: a new report finds that, in the past decade, the obesity rate for kids aged two to five has plummeted by more than 40%. These toddlers are now the only Americans fit enough for military service.

Courtesy of the Gallup-Healthways State Health Index, here are all of the 50 states, ranked from the absolute worst for your emotional and physical well-being to the most livable.

"A lot of you do not like me after my latest article 'Congratulations, You've Vaccinated Your Child And Now They're Retarded.'" Thought Catalog discusses public health.

The food industry has a generally glum outlook for sales in the coming year. But there is a bright spot: the portion of Americans buying gluten-free food has more than doubled in the past three years. Why?

More than 90,000 Americans today are waiting for a kidney transplant. If you're healthy, you can donate a kidney to one of them. And, according to a new study, it's overwhelmingly likely you'd be just fine afterwards.

It's hard being a kid. Teenagers across America say they're stressed out, and many report feeling "overwhelmed, depressed or sad." No wonder. Many of them are not drinking coffee.

Finally ending its quest to be the "cool" pharmacy, CVS announced on Wednesday that its stores will stop selling cigarettes and other tobacco products by October 1. The move will cost the chain an estimated $2 billion per year, though, in the long term, the company stands to make more by banning tobacco sales.

In 2012, there were an estimated 14 million new cases of cancer worldwide. Man, that's nothing.

"Shapewear" makes you look shapely. Allegedly. It definitely makes you feel shapely, because it squeezes the bejeezus out of your vital organs. Science now says that this pressure is potentially hazardous to your health. But hey, you'll leave a svelte-looking corpse, right?

Sure, everyone knows that smoking causes lung cancer, heart disease, emphysema, and stankness. But that's not all!

Those "workplace wellness programs" that your job offers to help you stop smoking and lose weight and whatnot are fucking worthless, statistically speaking.

Consumer Reports bought and tested more than 300 chicken breasts. "More than half of the chicken breasts were tainted with fecal contaminants," and two thirds of them tested positive for E. coli.

It's hard enough being an elderly woman in today's society, what with sexism, ageism, and those bizarre "brooches" everyone expects you to wear. So hey, old ladies: don't make it harder on yourself by being so lazy. Get up and MOVE!

Research shows that sex is only "moderate" exercise—"Though some men...used more energy for brief periods during sex than they did jogging." I bet while they were vigorously thrusting their penises.

It would be alarmist of us to predict that you, the randomly selected Gawker reader, will suffer from dementia in the future. Let's just say... the chances of it are getting better.

President Obama announced a $100 million dollar HIV research initiative earlier today at the National Institutes of Health, saying, "The United States should be at the forefront of new discoveries into how to put HIV into long-term remission without requiring lifelong therapies, or better yet, eliminate it completely."

For years, doctors have agreed: Smoking prevents one serious disease. They just have no freaking clue why. Guess which disease it is?

Nuts: the demure yet dynamic dynamos at nature's table. Might it be true, friends, that eating nuts will actually cause you to not die? Yes. It is absolutely true. Science celebrates The Nut!

If there's anything Americans enjoy almost as much as gobbling fried foods topped with Cheez, it's gobbling menacingly-named "diet supplements" in a desperate attempt to lose weight. Today, more evidence that Who Knows What The Hell Is Even In That Crap?

Dick "Dick" Cheney, the defining political figure of 21st century America, is publishing a book next week called Heart: An American Medical Odyssey, about his own health problems. Cheney had the first of his five heart attacks in 1978. What if he had not survived?