21-year-old Scout Willis is a senior at Brown University and, according to Ivy League gossip blog IvyGate, behind pseudonymous Twitter account @BougPunk where she describes her boozy exploits. Among them: Avoiding Terry Richardson sex acts, stealing from American Apparel, and sneaking into Chateau Marmont (Does the progeny of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore really have to "sneak in"?) and charging snacks to Lindsay Lohan's room.

Let's learn about Harvard kids and their senses of humor! A Harvard tipster sends us the following explanation for the video you see above:

Yesterday, we brought you part one of the Saga of the Princeton Student's Eleven Weapon Which Was Stolen from Wawa at 2 A.M. Today, we bring you its bittersweet conclusion, thanks to Princeton student Dan Mossing:

A tipster passes along the following missive, sent on Saturday to the residents of Forbes College. We reproduce it here only to help its author find his (her?) belongings.

Nice.

Are you a lonely Columbia Journalism School grad whiling away Valentine's Day with thoughts of your persistent crush on your old professor Duy Linh Tu, head of the Digital Media Program and self-proclaimed "Original Multimedia Gangsta?" Cupid is emailing you.

This morning we read how Yale Daily News, "Gutsiest Campus Newspaper of 2011," sat on the story of perfect Yale quarterback Patrick Witt's sex assault scandal for two months. Now, a humorous coda to their silence: We hear that YDN actually considered calling on wealthy alumni to charter a jet for the campus hero, so he wouldn't have to choose between the Yale-Harvard game and his Rhodes Scholarship interview.

Remember Patrick Witt, the Yale quarterback who chose the Yale-Harvard game over a chance at a Rhodes scholarship? As it turns out, it wasn't much of a choice: Witt's Rhodes candidacy had already been withdrawn over allegations of sexual assault.

When it comes to paranoia, certain environments are more fertile than others. Yale University, gothic bastion of secret societies and birthplace of the C.I.A., is among America's most fertile.

A strange coda for story of perfect Yale quarterback Patrick Witt, who dropped out of the finalist round for the Rhodes Scholarship so he could play in the Harvard-Yale football game: While Patrick was agonizing over his decision, his coach Tom Williams told everyone that he faced the same dilemma as a linebacker at Stanford in 1992, and chose football.

GZA, the man who becomes the head when Wu-Tang Clan forms like Voltron, will be giving a guest lecture at Harvard next month. Better than a mountain climber who plays an electric guitar, amirite? This "Ivy League lecture as album promo tour trend" is the coolest thing to happen to the Ivy League since the Dartmouth meth lab.

After weeks of angst, perfect Yale quarterback Patrick Witt has decided to skip his Rhodes Scholarship interview so he can play in the Harvard-Yale football game. Better not lose now, Yale!

Yale University quarterback Patrick Witt is "every inch the football hero," "a contender for the NFL draft," "the most accurate passer in Yale history." He is also very smart, with a 3.91 GPA and a shot at the Rhodes Scholarship.

Elite college newspaper The Harvard Crimson has noticed a trend: Sometimes during class, people play with Facebook instead of pay attention.

Just as the Civil War turned brother against brother, father against son, Occupy Wall Street now has a civil feud, between overachieving identical twin sisters Jill and Nicole Carty.

28-year-old Dartmouth grad student Randy Lamberghts was arrested for attempting to manufacture meth in his apartment. He was a chemistry major, if you can believe it.

Oops. Yale University recently announced that the names and Social Security numbers of 43,000 people affiliated with the school were publicly available online for about 10 months. Ivy League institutions, they're just like us: completely and utterly exposed.

Rising Cornell sophomore Cristina Lara wants her school to abolish its 50GB/month student bandwidth limit. (To use more, students have to pay.) "Internet usage is free in virtually every college and university in the country," Cristina writes in a petition, "and it's also free among all 7 other institutions in the Ivy League." Sounds reasonable.

The July/August issue of Yale's alumni magazine had an alumni note—one of those little message-board-style missives that lets all your classmates know what you've been up to—that caught Ben Smith's eye. It's from Sam Taylor, class of '73:

Last week we breathlessly reported on America's Whitest Colleges, which we deduced from a list of schools that had signed deals to have Brooks Brothers produce incredibly goofy clothing with their college logos. The single most shocking school that did not appear on that list: Yale. UNTIL NOW.