• Because of the "good behavior" she displayed by showing up in court, Paris Hilton will only serve about 23 days, and she'll be separated from the general inmate population. Just like at Hyde! [AP]
  

· Victims of the upfronts II: Pam is down! We repeat, Pam. Is. Down.· (Don't worry, she's going to be OK.)
· The Lede blog rounds up the misguided commercial-to-sitcom projects of the past.
· While a Shrek the Third drinking game sounds mildly diverting, we'd instead recommend that you get so shitfaced at home that you can no longer drive yourself to the theater.
· Paris Hilton: object.
· At the end of M. Night Shyamalan's open house, prospective home-buyers discover that the mansion isn't actually for sale. (The clues, of course, were right in front of their eyes the whole time.)

NICK DOUGLAS — I'm not one to look a gift naked woman in the mouth. But has anyone wondered, if Wired Magazine is so gung-ho about going "transparent," why did they ruin a perfectly good chance to do so with their cover photo of Jenna Fischer? The lovely Office actress's airbrushed skin looks like a slick synthetic ooze. Contrast Wired's fakery with this natural, humanizing near-nude photo in Jane Magazine.

· The Screengrab blog compiles a two-part top ten list of the worst accents in movie history, including Keanu Reeves' hilarious effort in Bram Stoker's Dracula, which produced a result so bizarre that his dialect coach was executed following its premiere.
·The Office's Jenna Fischer finds a way to increase her already impressive nerd fanbase.
· Winona Ryder's rack is poised to make a big-time comeback.
· Still no bids on Gwen Stefani's petrified wedding donuts.