• What caused the death of troubled socialite and heiress Casey Johnson, who was discovered dead in her LA home yesterday? It's too soon to say since toxicology results are pending, although at least one tabloid is suggesting prescription pills may have been involved. In a bizarre twist to the story, Johnson's "fiancée," reality TV star/fame addict Tila Tequila, tweeted last night that Johnson hadn't actually died and was really in a coma, before backtracking a little while later and acknowledging what had already been confirmed by the police. Tequila's also believed to be the last person to have seen the Johnson & Johnson heiress alive. [TMZ, NYP, NYDN]
• It looks like when Beyoncé performed in St. Barts on New Year's Eve, she was doing so at the behest of Hannibal Khadafy, the son of Libyan dictator Moammar Khadafy. This would be the same man who is rumored to have broken his wife's nose last month, was arrested in 2005 for punching her, and was detained by the police in Geneva in 2008 for beating his servants. So either Beyoncé is really hard up for cash (which is doubtful), or she needs someone to vet her public appearances going forward. [P6]
• The third White House state dinner crasher has been identified. His name is Carlos Allen and he's a DC-based party promoter, and he managed to sneak into the White House by hopping on a bus filled with Indian diplomats. [WP]
• Susan Sarandon has denied reports that she's involved with Jonathan Bricklin, her partner in SPiN, the ping pong club on the East Side. But a source close to the 31-year-old entrepreneur says Bricklin and Sarandon spent New Year's together and were very "touch-feely." [Fox411]

L.A. Dodger Matt Kemp squeezed Rihanna. Who's happier, him or the photographer who shot it? Vince Vaughn gets married. Gaga gets a new look. Jeremy Piven has a lobotomy scar? Tuesday gossip has room for argument.

Pictures may only be worth a thousand words, but they can certainly sear an image onto your brain for all eternity. Here are the pictures that defined 2009 on Gawker.

• Nicole Kidman isn't as vanilla as she looks, apparently. She tells British GQ that she has experimented with "obsession" and "strange sexual fetish stuff," although it's unclear when all this happened. As for her marriage to Keith Urban? It's "a very extraordinary, adventurous place to be: incredibly raw, incredibly dangerous." [DM, P6]
• The first of Lindsay Lohan's dramatic calls to her dad Michael has been released, and luckily, it comes accompanied by on-screen subtitles although you may need to shower after. At one point, she tells her dad, "Mommy says that I'm worse than you are," and then, between sobs, manages to ramble on, "No one cares about me. They don't, by the way. It's about how they feel, not how I feel. It's not about me. It's never been about me." Sad. [Radar]
• In happier news, Jeremy Piven is feeling much better now that he's added soy milk to his list of food products he will no longer touch. (You may remember his little run-in with sushi last year.) Piven was chugging 12 cups of soy milk a day, but then he realized it contained estrogen and was responsible for giving him man-boobs. "It was a very confusing time," he says. [Us]

A Brit commented happily on American girls; an actual mayor commented pessimistically on foursquare and Jeremy Piven commented critically on Halloween. The Twitterati were flexing their credentials.

• Brad Pitt lives. Although his motorcycle was rear-ended by a paparazzo's car on Saturday and he lost his balance, neither he nor his bike suffered any damage, although he did get to exchange a few "heated" words with the photographer before leaving the scene. [Us]
• Lindsay Lohan's downward spiral continues, not surprisingly. She's been dropped by her record label, Casablanca Records, and there are reports that she isn't even getting paid for her gig as Emanuel Ungaro's "artistic adviser." And she's been on a "serious shopping spree" in recent days, which probably isn't good news. Then again, she's being followed around by camera crews, so maybe this will all be turned into a reality show at some point. [P6, NYDN]
• Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner tied the knot in front of 500 guests yesterday in an "over the top" ceremony at the Trump National Golf Club in Bedminster, New Jersey. (On hand for the big event: Andrew Cuomo, Rudy Giuliani, Anna Wintour, Barbara Walters, Sheldon Silver, and Emmy Rossum, among others.) The couple is heading to Africa on their honeymoon. [NYP]

Jon and Kate Gosselin are basically the worst people in the history of TV. Pennsylvania pride! Scott Weiland's wife: a crazy-awesome smack addict. Kanyeezy's community serveezy. J-Lo's Lola gives me facehurt. Weirdos! Celebrities! Whatever! Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

• Lindsay Lohan is having another bad week. At the Whitney Museum of Art Gala last night, the "jelly-legged actress" had to hold on to a fence for "dear life" as she "stumbled out of the glitzy bash." But Mischa Barton was looking surprisingly put together, so that's good news, right? [Daily Mail, Sun]
• It's been a few years since Salman Rushdie and Padma Lakshmi split up, but the author is still obsessed with his ex-wife and talks about her "day and night," says Rushdie's most recent girlfriend, Broadway actress Pia Glenn. She also says Rushdie broke things off with her via email and may have been just using her for sex. [P6]
• Ali Wise, the socialite/ex-Dolce & Gabbana publicist who appeared in court yesterday on charges she hacked into a rival's phone, won't have to mount her defense until January. But there are four women now claiming Wise broke into their voicemail accounts now, not just one. [NYDN]

• Jeremy Piven, now fully recovered from his bout with mercury poisoning, has been squiring lots of women around town in recent days. He was out with "a super-pretty African American girl" last Friday; a day later, he was at the Rangers season opener with "a gorgeous blond." Let this be another reminder, however, that short, balding guys can date whoever they want as long as they're on a hit TV show. [P6]
• Producers for Tinsley Mortimer's reality show are reportedly having a hard time getting her friends to sign on. Peter Davis, the Tinz's half-brother-in-law, wrote on Facebook that he has "zero interest in playing a warped, twisted version of myself on television." And socialites Zani Gugelmann and Dani Stahl have also passed. So far the only person confirmed is her sister, Dabney Mercer. So does that mean her ex, Topper Mortimer, is out, too? [P6]
• Padma Lakshmi has said she'd like to keep her pregnancy a private matter. And judging by pictures of her at various parties this week, she's barely showing. But none of that stopped her from telling a reporter that she needs to keep her belly "really lubricated" these days: "Every morning, there's a buttering ceremony after I get out of the shower," she said. "It's really like basting a turkey with body butter." [People]

Are Jennifer and Brad going to reconcile? Will Nancy Grace eat Jon Gosselin's face? Can Levi Johnston get in shape for Playgirl? And why do women find Jeremy Piven attractive? Welcome, inquisitive reader, to your Wednesday morning gossip roundup!

Warning: Jeremy Piven has resumed eating fish. All Broadway shows are doomed.

The devil is in the details, and the details to this little devil's story keep getting piled on. Piven told David Letterman last night that he not only had mercury poisoning, but a host of other ailments as well.

• Speculation over the cause of DJ AM's death last Friday continues. People's sources tell the magazine Goldstein had eight undigested OxyContin pills in his stomach (and a ninth in his mouth) when he died, pretty clear evidence it was a suicide. TMZ reported a few days ago that the overdose was accidental, and it's sticking by its version of events. [People, TMZ]
• In the meantime, Goldstein's ex-girlfriend, model Hayley Wood, is denying rumors that he took his life because he was distraught over their breakup. [Us]
• Lindsay Lohan may now be leaving behind her LA home. But she may be leaving behind an unpaid $50,000 rent bill, too. [Radar]
• Kate Hudson is a little "clingy" when it comes to A-Rod, apparently. [MSNBC]

• Mischa Barton didn't get involuntarily committed to the psychiatric wing of Cedars-Sinai last month because she had a meltdown. Or a drug problem. She says it was because she had her wisdom teeth removed. Sounds plausible! [TONY]
• Speaking of lame excuses, remember how Jeremy Piven said he had to drop out of Speed the Plow because he had mercury poisoning? An arbitrator bought the story, apparently, because he ruled in his favor, dismissing charges filed against him by producers of the show. [NYP]
• Minka Kelly's rep is shooting down rumors that she's planning a fall wedding to Derek Jeter. [NYDN]

Jeremy Piven today celebrated his court victory over the producers of Speed-the-Plow, who sued the actor after he dropped out of their production. He said he got "mercury poisoning" from fish. The National Fisheries Institute wants you to remain skeptical.

The arbitrator in the case of sushi-loving Jeremy Piven versus the Broadway producers of Speed-the-Plow ruled today that the producers could not prove their breach of contract suit against the star. But they still think they were right.

[Jeremy Piven butches it up for his big adventure, pedaling in style to meet his girlfriend yesterday in Malibu. Photo via X17]

Lindsay Lohan's house may have been broken into, live! Katie Holmes inspired creepy Scientology fashion lines. Charles Dickens was a ladies' man's momma's boy. Jeremy Piven: alive. Bill Clinton: bedbugged. Anna Paquin: nekkid. Presenting your Sunday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Ever since Jeremy Piven almost died from eating sushi and had his corpse turned into a thermometer by David Mamet, the world has been wondering, "How are Piven's mercury levels doing like these days?" Well, now we know.

Jeremy Piven, Dane Cook and Kid Rock all went out in Vegas together and took a picture to document the fun times, which they then posted to Twitter. Prepare to moisten when you click through!