There's never been a better time to go on a crime spree in California. To cut the state's $20 billion budget deficit, under a proposed plan convicted felons can be released on parole with no supervision. Not a bad idea!

Tour companies are capitalizing on the popularity of "reality tours" through the city's gang areas with new boat trips along the polluted coast. Among the highlights: nylon mesh diapers, toxic fish, smokestacks, and oil islands. [LAT]

Patti Stanger of Millionaire Matchmaker fame is ditching L.A. and coming to the Big Apple to film the fourth season of her show. We have a feeling it will be harder to find suitable millionaires than people looking for sugardaddies.

We snuck into the Weinstein Oscars party by entering through the service entrance and hiding in the bathroom. It ended with us eavesdropping on Harvey—who introduced his kids with "these are my fucking children"— and getting banned.

Last night Los Angeles was drained of star power because super-agencies WME and CAA had house parties with ridiculous security. Things we discovered: bribing people is harder than you think, security guards are scary and we belong among the dregs.

The fiery, war-torn streets of the American urban hellscape that is LA have given birth to some serious vigilantes. Bike theft is running rampant in California's dystopic bowels, so two couriers recently took the law into their own hands.

We're goin' to Hollywoooood! No, adorable wisher, we're not done with auditions and watching Hollywood Week. This week's installment of 10,000 Maniacs: The TV Series just took place in LA, so the judges could sleep in their own beds.

After a shining moment as one big weed spot, the L.A. City Council has voted to cut the number of medical marijuana dispensaries there by more than 90%. The government, dude. This is quite an inconvenience for smokin' commuters. [AP]

It's official: Jeffrey Deitch is the new LA MOCA director. See Kelsey Keith's backgrounder here.

Art! Who goes there? Now: we do. In the second installment of our fortnightly Sunday art column, Kelsey Keith explains what a Jeffrey Deitch is, and why after tomorrow, the entire art world will be watching his every move.

[Jersey Shore star Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi carries a monogrammed purse (that doesn't match her outfit) emblazoned with the mysterious letter J while walking the Los Angeles streets with DJ Paulie Directions on Saturday night. Image via X17]

DJ AM's Lafayette Street apartment hasn't gone up for sale yet, but his Beverly Hills house can now be yours for $3.795 million. Real Estalker has the photos and details. [Real Estalker]

Obama's willing to look the other way on the medical marijuana thing. You know who is not, though? Lawmen in L.A., which is now one big legal weed spot. They are such bitches.

If you happen to be moving to LA and you've got $4,350 a month to spend, be advised that Samantha Ronson's Hollywood Hills home is now up for rent. [Real Estalker]

One of the biggest (if not the biggest) graf pieces in America—a 57-foot high, one-third mile long "MTA" on a concrete ditch in LA—is being painted over. Finally, a clean concrete ditch. [via Animal NY. Pic: Flickr]

California's wildfires more than doubled in size in less than 24-hours.

Super-special "strike teams" have been put in place to protect broadcast towers from LA's fire.

DJ AM - né Adam Goldstein - was the Kevin Bacon of LA's music-celebrity scene, except he was connected to everyone by two degrees. His death gets more tragic as it unfolds. The outpouring for him out there's large.

So, L.A., apparently, you're on fire, we hear? 3,000 homes on the northeastern edge of the city are currently being evacuated after 20,000 acres have already been burned. Want to see what it looks like in 24 seconds?

The lights were set to go out on the Los Angeles County Museum of Art's weekend film program. But then some deep-pocketed angels came down to give it a helping hand! Let us rejoice!