In last night's penultimate episode of the season, we saw all the problems of the season converge in a screwball comedy of manners that sank this season even deeper into the mire.

Wham! Bam! Bang! Slash. Squirt. Last night's episode of All My Mormons was a regular action movie, wasn't it? Well, part of it at least. The rest was your usual strange almost-sorta-melodrama.

Well, that got dark really quick, didn't it? What had been an oddly buoyant season of Big Love took a serious turn toward the sinister last night, as Bill became that which he most hates.

Today, a judge ruled video of next week's trial on the constitutionality of California's gay marriage ban could be uploaded YouTube. Now a question looms larger even than Prop. 8's constitutionality: Will the trial go viral?

Earlier this week, we called congressman Jason Chaffetz a self-hating weirdo, an asshole, a probable closet case, and the son of Kitty Dukakis. He is not the son of Kitty Dukakis. We regret the error.

Washington DC will allow gay marriage, yay! But because DC is not allowed to govern itself, the legislation can still be revoked by the US Congress. No one in Congress really wants to get involved. Besides one Republican hero! (Corrected!)

It's night two of the epic Sing-off, or The Subtle Train Wreck of 2009. Last night, the show proved to be educational beyond my wildest dreams. Did Nick Lachey and the gang keep it up tonight? HELL YEAH, they did!

Go Utah! Only a fraction of you are crazy! It is initially surprising that conservative, lily-white Utah is less nuts than, say, Virginia. But when you think about it for a minute, it makes sense.

This afternoon, President Obama will meet with Thomas Monson, head of the Mormon Church. They will talk about family history. They will probably not talk about when the Mormons baptized Obama's dead mother. [CBS]

Future president Mitt Romney is both a "Bainiac"—a data-obsessed business android indoctrinated into Bain and Company's cultish worldview—and a Mormon. So his foreign policy is a weird, numerological, schematic mess. Here it is in PowerPoint, his native language.

The Way We Live Now: Telling Mormons we're not fucking interested. Just like before the recession! But now the Mormons are selling security systems, which you need to protect your secret stash of opulent home furnishings. Come back, Mormons!

The Mormons posthumously baptized Barack Obama's mom! Isn't that sweet of them? Sweet and creepy? Well, these things happen. This particular thing happens a lot, in fact.

Today is: Gay Utah finds a new prom queen, Non-Gay Utah hates freedom, Sahara continues to hemorrhage money, Twilight newz!!, and frigging Octomom.

We went back to Brooklyn last night, to see what we could find. And there, waiting for us, was a troubled girl with tattoos and a Mormon boy with sex issues. And, adventure.

Senator Orrin Hatch is one of those easily caricatured figures of cartoonishly prudish conservativism, so naturally everyone back home in Utah is now furious with him for associating with black criminals.

Yesterday we told you about the current Real World: Crooklyn cast that is filming all over our trendiest borough, and its maybe-gay (?) Mormon virgin fellow who the producers are trying to get laid. Because, ha ha ha, it's fun to watch people violate all they stand for and cheat on their fiances. Totes hilars. Some of you, based on his scarf and Elvis Costello glasses getup (and just the general sexiness of fucking some wholesome Mormon kid, I guess) said you'd deflower him if the situation was right. Well now, from our friend at Driven By Boredom, we have photos of said Mormon lad for you to assess. Now, will you be his very first bone? Take a look at the above photo, and the couple after the jump. We think he's cute, sure, but there's something so cultivated about his look. It just seems a bit forced. Maybe too forced... And, hah! These kids are really making the rounds. A funny tipster saw them at East Village shit hut Angels & Kings last night:

As we're all too aware, the new season of MTV's once pioneering, now blotto and lonely reality series The Real World is currently filming in Brooklyn. The cast members live in Red Hook, but party in Williamsburg and shop downtown and all that hip, hip Brooklyn stuff. And, conceivably, the dudes meet chicks. Except one of them! His name is Chet and he is Mormon and, though he's engaged to a young lady back home in Salt Lake City (a city name that celebrates a barren nothingness of a lake whose only inhabitants are brine shrimp and brine flies), the producers want him to get laid. Because he's a virgin! Could you be the lucky girl (or guy)??? Read a bit about him after the jump. Again, his name is Chet. He's a Mormon with "spiky blonde hair." On the evening that the NY Press caught up with him, he was wearing an H&M scarf and "Elvis Costello glasses," and was drinking a Shirley Temple. He apparently loves glam rock and was "gushing" when some slinky male rocker put something around his neck and whispered in his ear. And, yes, he is engaged (as all Mormons are, from birth. That's just science). But, um, doesn't that above description sound a little well, um, un-fishy, if you catch my brine shrimp drift? So who's going to fuck this kid? Will youuuuu? The above photo, from NewYorkology, seems to offer the best known glimpse of the mysterious Mormon.

An LDS spokesman dropped by to tell us that no, the LDS folks did not try to buy into Facebook. I was going to say, this'll teach us to listen to barroom rumors. But it won't, it won't.

Brooklynite Zack Klein claims that "an employee close to the deal" — translation: somebody was drunk — told him the church San Franciscans love to hate "made an unsolicited bid to acquire Facebook." The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was estimated in 1997 to have $25 to $30 billion in assets and a $5 billion annual revenue stream, making a Facebook buy-in a possibility. True? Maybe. Fodder for lunch discussion all over the Bay Area? Definitely. (Photo by AP/Douglas C. Pizac)

The LAT ran a fascinating piece today on Richard Dutcher, the filmmaker who was anointed the father of Mormon cinema after his 2000 sleeper hit, God's Army, ushered in a wave of Mormon-focused indie flicks. Now, Dutcher is releasing what's being marketed as "the first R-rated Mormon movie" — and it's a doozy, peppered with cursing, nudity and violence. Called Falling, it stars Dutcher as an amoral videographer attempting to figure out his life after repudiating his faith. It's a concept Dutcher knows well, because the father of Mormon cinema is now renouncing his religion: