As long as mankind has gazed into the vast night sky above, he has wondered: hey, is that a giant alien death star ship, parked over by Mercury?

There is only one accepted portrait of Jane Austen, sketched by her sister in 1810, in which the author of Sense and Sensibility and Pride and Prejudice looks to be extremely pissed off. But Austen scholar Dr. Paula Byrne, who is working on a definitive biography due out some time in 2013, has discovered a portrait in auction, and thinks there is an excellent possibility that the woman in it daintily holding a quill and staring out a window pensively — which, coincidently, is precisely how I look at this exact moment — could be Austen herself.

A female resident of Portland, Oregon was at home cooking tofu when, suddenly and without warning, her kitchen exploded. The woman said she was rinsing her tofu pan in the sink when a mysterious force—she isn't sure what—burned her hand and knocked a six-foot window out of her home and onto the street.

Life can be difficult when your vehicle has a huge Wikileaks logo and "Top Secret Mobile Collection Unit" emblazoned on the side. An artist's Wikileaks-themed U-Haul truck is missing after being confiscated by the NYPD.

If you thought that Ohio had cornered the market on aggressively sexual ghosts, you were wrong (as always!): Over in England, 73-year-old Doris Birch says she's had trouble going to sleep over these past four months because of the ghost who gropes her all night long.

Attention! If you landed a plane at the Houston Executive Airport in Texas on Monday, and then disappeared, the police would like to talk to you. About the fact that your plane is filled with marijuana.

On Sunday, a man standing outside the train station in Gothenburg, Sweden, "suddenly caught on fire," according to a witness. Police have no idea who he is. Welcome to another weekend in the country that brought you Girl With the Dragon Tattoo!

Everyone knows that the authorities have reopened the case of actress Natalie Wood's 1981 drowning death, which is officially still classified as an accident. The police held a press conference in LA today and announced that her husband, Robert Wagner, is not a suspect.

Thanksgiving, 1981. Natalie Wood spends the weekend on Splendour, the yacht she shared with husband Robert Wagner, docked at Catalina Island. With the couple is Christopher Walken, with whom she was shooting Brainstorm, a sci-fi film which would be her last.

A crazy person, certainly. A tipster sent us shots of these leaflets, which have been going up "all around D.C. streets in recent days." In addition to misspelling his first name, the flyers accuse Scalia of date rape, soliciting prostitutes, and pistol-whipping women in hotel rooms. For more information, they recommend that you contact Scalia. He'll probably just deny it.

Used to be that people here in America would sometimes "move" themselves and their belongings from their present dwelling place to a new, different dwelling place. No more.

Ilya Zhitomirskiy, a 22-year-old co-founder of the hyped Facebook rival Diaspora committed suicide this weekend in San Francisco. Now the tech community is reeling, and asking hard questions about the pressure facing young tech entrepreneurs.

This smokey whitish mass of nothing obvious in particular is actually—and this is serious, guys—authentic ghost porn. Look again. See the human-shaped figures? See the outline of the lady-ghost's high-heel? Not really? You're probably not trying hard enough. Look again.

It's always a bummer to get stopped by cops on the highway! But if your truck gets pulled over, it's better to be the driver than the dead body on top.

To hear the Telegraph tell it, there's almost no doubt as to what befell Stefan Ramin, a 40-year-old yachtsman from Hamburg, Germany, who disappeared in September on the remote isle of Nuku Hiva in French Polynesia: He was eaten by cannibals!

Following the discovery of charred human remains beside a campfire in French Polynesia, European rumormongers fretted that Stefan Ramin—a German tourist who went missing while vacationing on the island of Nuku Hiva—had been eaten by cannibals.

A new biography of Vincent van Gogh, which is getting a featured segment on 60 Minutes this weekend, posits that the post-Impressionist master didn't commit suicide by shooting himself in the abdomen, as previously believed.

Doctors are baffled at the case of Nguyen Thi Phuong, a 26-year-old Vietnamese woman who says that an allergic reaction caused her skin to sag and wrinkle, effectively aging her 50 years in just a few days.

Okay, sorry, this post probably should have been tagged "NSFW" due to the large image of an old man's melting face. But let's move beyond courtesies: Was Ron Paul's eyebrow collapsing during Tuesday's debate? This image appears to show a fake eyebrow just stone cold fallin' off.

Something is rotten in the state of New York. Specifically, upstate. People in the Buffalo area keep crashing their cars into buildings, and nobody can explain it.