Three hours and 38 minutes after trading was suspended because of a technical glitch, the New York Stock Exchange has officially reopened.

Robert Pattinson took his "I'm totally over Kristen Stewart" tour to the New York Stock Exchange, where he and Cosmopolis director David Cronenberg rang the Opening Bell, launching, as People magazine pointed out, a thousand "'ring my bell anyday' quips."

There are questions among the hacktivist collective Anonymous whether today's planned attack against the New York Stock Exchange's website in support of Occupy Wall Street is an elaborate trick to entrap participants or smear the movement. Whatever! It's still apparently kicking off less than two hours from now.

Anarcho-Doritologist hacker collective has declared war on the New York Stock Exchange and will launch a "raid" on the company's website on Monday, October 10! Or is "Operation Invade Wall Street" a "fake planted operation"? Or maybe it doesn't really matter either way.

[On the day General Motors launched the biggest IPO in US history, GM CEO Daniel Akerson is mobbed by press outside the New York Stock Exchange as he tries to drive away in his Camaro. Image via AP]

If you were watching CNBC around 4:00 this afternoon, you would have seen today's "Closing Bell" ceremony at the NYSE, featuring Gawker Media's own Scott Kidder and Phil Vuong! If you missed it, though, don't fret—there's video inside.

[A trader on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange scowls as the closing bell rings. He's sad because the Dow lost 265 points today. That means we're all poor again. Image via Getty]

[Traders on the New York Stock Exchange finally had something to cheer about when the U.S. soccer team won their World Cup game against Algeria today to proceed to the tournament's final round. Image via Getty]

In the market for a fiendishly festive portrait of former New York Stock Exchange honcho Richard Grasso? Of course you are. Who could resist the soothing, gremlinesque visage of a gentle man who just wants his damned $140 million already? Exhibited today outside the Exchange by artist Geoffrey Raymond, the piece goes for a mere $2,500 on eBay. No payments for six months, and you needn't fear an investigation from the attorney general's office.