The Observer's John Koblin heard the New York Times is supposedly working on a major story on our wacky governor. The guy's admitted to drugs and adultery, what else could there be? (We're all ears!) Update: More sex, looks like.

He's in an abandoned movie theater in Flatbush! Previously in "Lowly places the New York Times has sent its future publisher:" A lightbulb-changing tour, a playground, the Puerto Rican Day parade, a Nazi rally, a tree, and a boat. You'll look back fondly on these crappy assignments one day, A.G. Pay those dues!

Here, the original turnstile from the old New York Times cafeteria can be yours for only $1,350. For the same price you could hire Tom Friedman to speak for just over one minute. [Olde Good Things]

What happens when a group of social media freaks—including Ann Curry—get trapped in an elevator? It is electronically recorded and broadcast over the internet at near-dizzying speed. Welcome to the most thoroughly documented elevator entrapment ever.

In your musk-scented Monday media column: A use found for print media, the Harper's editor firing saga continues, small stakes mean big arguments in journalism academia, and Howell Raines returns.

Don't fight commitment. Don't fight biological clocks, and don't fight the NYT's Weddings & Celebrations, who always win the battle over your inferiority complex. Don't fight Gawker Weddings Expert Phyllis Nefler, either. But what happens when Vows fights The Law?

• It's the end of the line for Miramax. The studio that Harvey and Bob Weinstein founded in 1979, sold to Disney in 1993, and departed in 2005, was officially shuttered today, and 80 people were let go. [Wrap, NYT, Guardian]
• Jay Leno went on Oprah today to try and redeem himself. He acted like a cry-baby and flat-out lied (and may have gotten away with it anyway). In related news, Conan's final week on the air turned out to be his biggest, not surprisingly. And there are some signs the late-night debacle may have Comcast's bosses thinking about showing NBC chief Jeff Zucker the door.
• 48 million people tuned in to the State of the Union address last night. [NYT]
• Only 35 people have signed up for a subscription to Newsday.com since the paper set up a pay wall a few months back. But it's all going according to plan and Newsday management couldn't be happier, the paper claims. [Crain's]
• This is a bit awkward: The Wall Street Journal is rolling out a local edition this spring that it hopes will compete with the New York Times. But it may actually need the Times' help printing the papers to make it happen. [NYT]
• A growing number of Time Inc. staffers are defecting to Bloomberg. [NYP]
• Samantha Harris is bidding goodbye to Dancing with the Stars. [People]
• Is Fox News reporter Major Garrett a fan of hookers? Maybe! [Gawker]

Well, well, well. How does Rupert Murdoch feel about his precious newspaper war now? (Just fine). Rupert was so hot to build a New York edition of the WSJ to crush the rival New York Times once and for all, but apparently there is one small issue: he needs to borrow the NYT's printing press to make this whole thing work.

Scandal: Media reporter had media source.

• The iPad may be cool and all. But don't expect it to revolutionize newspapers. Or magazines. Or even book publishing. [AdAge, NYT, Reuters, NYT]
• The WSJ is getting ready to take on the Times. Three dozen staffers (and $15 mil.) will go into creating its new NYC edition, which debuts in April. [NYO]
• NBC and Conan O'Brien are back in business (sort of): The network is picking up a pilot from Conaco, O'Brien's production company. In less surprising news, Jay Leno says he hasn't spoken to Conan since the late-night drama unfolded; and Comcast's chief says he's behind NBC CEO Jeff Zucker (officially-speaking).
• ABC has decided to bring Ugly Betty to an end after this season. [LAT]
• MSNBC wasn't planning to air last Friday's Haiti telethon. But then Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow got involved and things changed. [NYO]
• Harvey and Bob Weinstein are looking to buy back the Miramax name. [DH]
• Louis Auchincloss, chronicler of WASP culture, is dead at 92. [NYT]

No doubt, Steve Jobs showed off a compelling tablet computer today, one that should excite people who make videogames, TV shows — even books. But today's Apple iPad debut was a big letdown for magazine and newspaper people.

Rupert Murdoch has wanted to throttle the gasping corpse of the New York Times ever since the day he overpaid for the Wall Street Journal. This is his passion. His first solid step is his previously announced New York local news hires at the WSJ. Today, John Koblin reports that he's not just grabbing a dozen reporters to put out a metro section; he is, in effect, building a competing local paper—complete with three dozen reporters, a $15 million budget, and a boatload of New York Sun veterans.

You know, That Guy: The conservative dude who ranged the quad like a pro-life Socrates, challenging Liberals to another insufferable partial-birth abortion fight? The guy who ruined all your parties; the guy with the... weird posters on his dorm wall.

The New York Times Company is launching new "Reader Applications" division, according to an internal memo. This is probably the first corporate re-organization motivated by an external product that doesn't officially exist. The new business-side group will oversee products for non-Apple devices like the Kindle, Sony Reader and Barnes & Noble Nook. In fact, the word "Apple" appears nowhere in today's memo from Times Company president Scott Heekin-Canedy. But the timing of the announcement just days before Apple is expected to unveil its own tablet device is not lost on company insiders. We're guessing newsroom staff will be watching Apple's tablet event as obsessively as any Apple fanboys later this week, if only to get details on the "continued growth in this new and important segment of" Times business.

It's the big game! Today's a huge day for football, and Weddings Expert Phyllis Nefler thinks you can use it to get laid! And maybe FIND LOVE. Apparently, so does the NYT's Weddings & Celebrations, who might've shown you how!

This New York Times profile of 73 year-old Frank Serpico, legendary cop whistleblower: awesome reading. He's old, bearded, Hermit-y, interrogates trespassers with sleds, and still talks about being shot in the face. But also: has a French girlfriend! Dope. [NYT]

The New York Times' announcement that it would start charging for its website in 2011 was more aspiration than business plan. Still, media folk have been debating it like the very existence of the NYT is at stake. It's not.

In your cool-person Thursday media column: Neel Shah's style secrets exposed, a job appears in the media(!), the NYT's web delay explained, and Donald Graham doesn't give a fuck about your hit pieces.

Good god. Remember that little outbreak of a mysterious intestinal illness at the New York Times that shut down the company cafeteria earlier this month? Well, they've run some tests, and...we don't know how to tell you this...it's... Norovirus. (*Checks Wikipedia.*) Dang that makes you throw up and poop!

• As rumored, the New York Times plans to begin charging readers to access stories on the NYT website. It will be a metered system (so only "frequent readers" will be affected), and it doesn't start until 2011. And faithful subscribers to the print edition won't be forced to pay anything extra. [NYT]
• What are the chances Conan lands at Fox? It could happen, but there are plenty of reasons why Fox might decide to back away from a deal. [WSJ]
• The news biz: Talks to bring Ted Koppel back to ABC News appear to have fallen through; Megyn Kelly is getting her own show on Fox News; and CNN has announced it's partnering with hipster mag Vice, oddly enough. [NYO]
• Condé Nast's Fairchild unit has a new chief. Gina Sanders, Lucky's publisher (and Si Newhouse's niece) will now be running the show. [WWD]
• The Sundance Film Festival kicks off in Park City, Utah tomorrow. And it's shaping up to be fest's "most important" year ever, supposedly. [NYT, WSJ]