In your plastic Wednesday media column: Greta Van Susteren explains why she's a better friend to "poor African Americans" than Barack Obama is, along with newspaper news, TV news, and New York Post blowjob news.

In your variegated Wednesday media column: Television's death foretold, the magazine industry's resurgence predicted, the Boston Globe's hope springs eternal, and something for tattoo enthusiasts to read.

• It's an ugly day at MySpace. The News Corp.-owned social network is slashing nearly 30 percent of its staff, or 400 people, due to a decline in sales. [BN, PC]
• Protesters in Iran have been using Twitter to keep up with developments on the ground. Now the State Department is stepping in and asking the company to put off a planned upgrade so service isn't disrupted. [Reuters]
• MTV entertainment president Brian Graden is departing the network. [NYP]
• It's official: NBC is dumping Live at Five and replacing it with an hour-long "daily information, lifestyle and entertainment show." [NYO]
• Interview dropped editorial director Glenn O'Brien last week. Now the magazine's parent company, Brant Publications, is suing him for allegedly breaking the terms of his confidentiality agreement. [WWD]

The New York Daily News dismissed gossip writer Sean Evans last Friday. The paper has yet to name a replacement to head up the Gatecrasher column with Laura Schreffler, and from the looks of things, the recruitment process isn't going very smoothly. Filling in for the week is "swag hag" Sarah Polonsky, the former National Enquirer reporter who worked very briefly at Page Six in late 2006, but was fired for running afoul of the paper's ban on accepting freebies. (Most recently, she's headed up a website called Cellofame.com.) Guard your gift bags, publicists! Polonsky's email below.

The failing San Francisco Chronicle has started—in the midst of the worst economic downturn since the Great Depression—a blog by two idly rich guys. Topic: "What's it like to be rich?" Lots of dodging pitchforks, I imagine.

Do you have a car? Are you able to "work long hours"? Are you willing to sell yourself into journalistic indentured servitude for less than half a pittance? Here's your chance to edit a Pulitzer Prize-winning paper!

In your intermittently gloomy Monday media column: a new font at the New York Times, a fantastical price for the Boston Globe, black people would like to be invited on television sometimes, and the recession proves Steve Forbes right:

On the scene to cover the Puerto Rican Day parade: none other than heir to the New York Times throne, A.G. "The Future" Sulzberger! A.G. did what he does best: ferret out penetrating quotes.

What do you do when your media overlords cut your salary by 23% in order to keep your job alive? Do as the Boston Globe staffers are doing and throw a rainy-weekend BBQ to "celebrate" it, naturally.

New York Daily News gossip writer Sean Evans—one half of the paper's Gatecrasher column—has been let go, we confirmed this afternoon.

In your finally Friday media column: Haaretz gets poetic, the Boston Globe gets profligate, Tim Russert gets remembered, and the newsy porn magazines get downsized:

Journo-nerd Bible the AP Stylebook—which last year unconscionably got rid of "riffraff" and "malarkey"—has been updated again. Things the AP just learned about in 2008: baba ghanoush, Twitter, and water sports.

In your ugly Thursday media column: a Chinese newspaper executive is brutally murdered, Sears pimps 'Good News,' John Norris picks up a new gig, and somebody's interested in the Boston Globe:

• The late night battle rages on: After losing ground to Letterman, Conan bounced back last night, and had a pretty solid first week overall. [THR, NYT]
• Boston-based Intercontinental Real Estate Corp. confirms that it has been talks with the New York Times Co. to purchase the Boston Globe. [BH]
• Stephen Colbert's decision to broadcast from Iraq worked out nicely: Ratings for the Comedy Central show have been up 25 percent this week. [NYT]
• Joy Behar is launching a new talk show on HLN. The best part about it: She'll be bumping blowhard Lou Dobbs from his 9pm slot on the network. [NYT]
• TV, print and online ad spending fell 14 percent in the first quarter. [WSJ]
• Hope you're a Marley & Me fan. HarperCollins is cemented a deal to publish 13 children's books about the world's most famous Labrador. Yes, 13. [PW]

Warren St. John, the dreamy NYT reporter and author of incongruous 'Bama football book Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, has a heartwarming new book about refugee soccer players that is a smash hit. Why won't his own paper review it?

Sick of haggling with an uncooperative union as an irretrievably dying paper loses more money every day, the New York Times Co. has hired an investment bank to sell off the Boston Globe. Buyers: ignore the preceding sentence. Great opportunity!

Pinch Sulzberger to Boston Globe: 'Mensch' me all you want, just take your pay cut.

In your soothing Wednesday media column: the Boston Globe has a sense of humor, Jon Friedman turns 10, the Weekly Standard's getting dumped, Steve Doocy's kid finds a job, and crazy people want to start a new newspaper.

• It's only been a week since Conan took over the top-rated Tonight Show, but David Letterman has already passed over him in the ratings. [NYT]
• Also: Dave Letterman's new contract will keep him at CBS through '12. [LAT]
• Yesterday the Boston Globe's largest union rejected the New York Times Co.'s proposed package of cuts. The NYT responded by implementing a 23 percent pay cut anyway and now the union is taking the matter to court. [NYT]
• Ratings are down for CNN's Lou Dobbs. And thank God for that. [NYO]
• It's official: Ari Emanuel is the new Mike Ovitz! Both the New York Times and The Daily Beast invoke Ovitz's name in lengthy pieces on "the pre-eminent power player in Hollywood" and "Hollywood's new don." [NYT, TDB]
• Sound the alarms! Swine flu has returned to Condé Nast! [Daily Intel]

The New York Times Co. reports today that it's retained Goldman Sachs to "manage the possible sale of the Boston Globe" and it "plans to request bids for Boston's major daily in the next couple of weeks." The paper hasn't indicated how much they're looking to get for the Globe, but if you'd like to get a head start and open the lines of communication, you'll find contact info for the man to talk to located on your left. If your budget is a bit more modest, but you're still interested in walking away with a NYT Co. cast-off, perhaps we can interest you in the Times jet? It's still on the market. And priced at a very reasonable $9.5 million, too! [Dealbook, Boston Globe]