In the world of Manhattan real estate, you have to go big to make a splash. No longer will anyone be impressed by your meager $98 million apartment purchase. Nine-figure apartment prices are the new eight-figure apartment prices.

Mayor Bill de Blasio's administration just confirmed its most important decision yet: the legalization of ferret ownership in New York City.

With heroin use in New York City on the rise, the New York State attorney general's office will provide the NYPD with 19,500 kits containing the anti-overdose medication naloxone. The $1.2 million initiative is similar to one in Suffolk County, which has saved 184 lives since 2012.

A water main broke on Houston Street this morning, flooding the Manhattan thoroughfare near Katz's Deli. Firefighters have responded to the scene and are working to pump water from the famous deli's basement. Adjust your commute accordingly.

They say that you become a real New Yorker on the day that you tell this Buzzfeed listicle to go fuck itself.

Early May 7, a drunk man allegedly stole an idling limo, terrifying its five passengers as he took them on a brief joy ride through Manhattan before crashing.

New York City's latest subway hero is Joshua Garcia, who jumped onto the Union Square subway tracks Wednesday and saved an unconscious teenage girl. He is a true hero. Many of the bystanders, however, are terrible people.

A Manhattan-bound F train derailed in Queens on Friday morning, injuring 19 people—four four of them seriously—and trapping 1,000 below ground.

A long New York Times look at global thinking on how to create affordable urban housing turns up only one workable idea: "It seems the only solution would be to level all of, say, North Brooklyn and put up monolithic prefab tower blocks." We support this.

The Brecht Forum, a New York venue for Marxist teaching, is closing down because rising costs and real estate prices have "made the provision of space impossible for an organization of our means." We are all Marxists now.

There once was a time when people in New York City lived in Brooklyn because it was significantly cheaper than Manhattan. Now people move to Brooklyn because of its Urban Outfitters concept store. Where will all the Brooklynites go now?

We live in a marvelous, annoying era in which startup geniuses constantly getting rich by "disrupting" mundane industries. Hotels? Disrupted. Taxis? Disrupted. On behalf of the beleaguered apartment hunters of New York City, I humbly request that someone disrupt real estate agents out of existence.

This week, President Obama mentioned that he is "concerned" with "the prospect of a nuclear weapon going off in Manhattan." What are the chances that that will happen in our lifetime? Let's guess!

New York City is so attractive that its population is growing past all-time highs. We're popular. We're cosmopolitan. And we have the most segregated schools in America.

Have u guys ever ridden the L train? What happened?

Around New York City, one often hears petulant calls for the city to return to the days when it was "real," meaning infested with crime, rather than with Pret A Manger locations. Such pleas are immature. Crime should only be returned to the Times Square area.

Bill de Blasio is NYC's mayor now. Ray Kelly and his racist stop and frisk program are gone. In his place is the new police commissioner, William Bratton. And it seems we may have simply traded stop and frisk for another annoying NYPD tactic.

In ancient times, "The Bowery" was a synonym for New York City's seedy, seething underworld. Today, the final remnants of Bowery poverty are, like any good metaphor, moving to Brooklyn and being replaced by a boutique hotel.

Hey are you looking for a fun new bar? Here is one.

"A mixed-income building on the Upper West Side has banned rent-stabilized tenants from a fancy new gym, decreeing that only those who pay market-rate rents can use the facility."