• Katie Couric's inevitable reign of evening news terror will not be limited to the television; CBS will be broadcasting on the radio and web, as well. You can't hide; her legs are gonna be spread all over the place. [NYT]
• Carmen Electra and Dave Navarro are splitting. That makes it official: reality television destroys your marriage and ensures that no one will give a shit when it happens. [Star]
• As a sex writer, you get to write about dildos and butt plugs. Plus, you get to keep whatever you try. Like swag, but with orgasms. [Craigslist]
• With the world rapidly approaching some sort of nuclear apocalypse, you can't help but miss Monica Lewinsky. [HuffPo Contagious Fest]
• Just because your mom was one of Union Square's most loyal drunkards doesn't mean you can't go to MIT. Hell, with a life story like that, you're guaranteed a winning application essay. [NYS]
• Remember Richard Nouveau and the nonexistant J-Date hoax wherein he claimed to have duped several girls into meeting him at Fat Baby? Well, the prank was a fake, but the guy and his publication, Pocket Change, are annoyingly real. [NYP]
• We swear to God, we did not post this on Craigslist. We'd only use BigMuscle. [Craigslist]
• Has Clay Aiken found a new man? And if so, did he find him in a Mystic Tan booth? [Faded Youth]
• ConEd swears they're able to handle the heat wave, lest we all spend our days swimming in ass soup. Which is still a distinct possibility. [NYB]
• Jann's looking for a new bitch. Matt Nye is just tired, ya know? [Mediabistro]