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PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so if lady luck should happen to gift you with one, don't squander it: Write it up and send it in! Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line) and tell everyone about the time you spotted David Hasselhoff working off a cheeseburger at your gym.

In today's episode: Sylvester Stallone; Al Pacino; Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher, and Rupert Everett; Kevin Bacon; Scarlett Johansson; Alicia Keys, and Rumer Willis; Jennifer Garner; Ellen DeGeneres and Portia Di Rossi; Shia LaBeouf; Timothy Dalton; David Hasselhoff; TR Knight; Ed Begley Jr.; BJ Novak; Joey McIntyre; Brody Jenner; Lance Bass and Sally Struthers.

· On Saturday night, 5-12, on Canon in Beverly Hills, Sylvester Stallone in a light blue sweater and serious mullet, walking like a musclebound zombie with wife and daughters(?). Has reached a point where he seems like a parody of himself.

· Just got back from an early Mother's Day dinner at Madeo that $$$ Italian Restaurant on Beverly. And as we sat there a guy with fluffed up brown hair comes towards me. I just stared thinking, is that Al Pacino? He looked sort of puffy and smooth and I always thought he was kind of craggy. But it was! I just stared wide eyed, impressed but not really since I never really liked him anyway. But it was a bit of a thrill. He sat at the bar with a bald guy. And my mom moved the wine bottles so she could see him. Then as we left I think I saw Brody Jenner. I don't know who he is but he looked/acted rich/famous. Later that night (after the Al Pacino sighting), I got dragged to Here and the Abbey. As we left at 2 am my friend said you just missed the In Sync guy. I said who? He said Lance Bass. We went next door to the Abbey for coffee and I missed him again. But my friend saw him in both places. I saw the back of his head.

· Friday May 4th:

Quadruple sighting at The Tower Bar:

So I'm walking into the Tower Bar for dinner and from around the corner I hear a familiar, soothing, sexy voice. I glance to the right to see Rupert Everett and probably his older gay lover having drinks in the restaurant entrance. Wow is he handsome in person.

Does it count if you saw a semi-recognizable band? I mean, I KNOW them from somewhere....The Shins I think....whoever they were they were smokin' hot.

Last but not least, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. Jerk's walked in like they owned the place. Call me crazy but isn't she some has been who hasn't been in anything for a long time? The only thing that she's famous for lately is robbing the cradle with Kelso. The looked like they were fresh in from doing whatever they do at Kabbalah on a Friday night. He was dressed in all white like Mr. Clean and she was going to a funeral in all black. That is all to report....

· Sunday 5/13, sometime between 6-7pm
Saw Kevin Bacon shopping at the Pavillions on Montana & Lincoln. He looked GOOD, wearing a sweet rocker-style leather jacket. This might be my favorite celeb sighting to date...as it was KEVINFREKIN BACON!!! My parents were in town and my dad was with me, although he doesn't get excited about much. My mom was pretty ticked off that she stayed home though.

· On Friday night at Hyde I was with a few friends and though the club was by no means crowded, among the partygoers were:

A overly done up Scarlett Johansson with fiery red lipstick and a floral print blouse that did absolutely nothing for her cleavage or side-boob (isn't she known for that)? She was with a group of three girls who acted as a phalanx around her, all of whom were LA 6's (if Scarlett is an LA 9).

An incognito Alicia Keys. Wearing a hat; I couldn't even really get a good look at her.

A short haired but very pretty Rumer Willis who, if IMDB is correct, isn't even 19 yet. She must have a great fake ID.

· Jennifer Garner and child, in the front window of the Kitchen Academy at the Arclight on Friday afternoon.

· Sunday Evening, Mother's Day: Ellen DeGeneres and Portia Di Rossi having a quiet dinner alone at an inside corner table at Pace in Laurel Canyon. They looked very much in love with each other.

· I saw Shia LaBeouf at the party at the Wilton Hilton last Saturday (5/5). Kid was rockin' the cheesy slicked-back hair he's been sporting recently, and I think he was wearing a Designs By Thomas T-shirt. It was pretty obvious he was looking to score, but I didn't see if he left with anyone because I was too distracted by the free-flowing tequila.

· Just saw none other than the Hoff at Easton Gym. No, not trying to work off the belly that made his most recent video debut that much more pathetic. He was standing on the balcony yakking on his cellphone. I shared my sighting with the register girl at Victoria's Secret, who said, "I saw him at the grocery store once. None of the younger girls knew who he was. But the older chicks were all trippin'."

Bitch.

· 5/12 Arriving for a Saturday workout at Santa Monica's decidedly unhip Easton Gym, a tall gent faintly resembling David Hasselhoff breezed by me in the small and empty locker room. Pulling up to the lockers, he set his gym bag down and declared in self-pep talk mode, "Alright, let's go!" to no one in particular. Had it been at the West Hollywood branch, such locker room banter could easily have been taken as an invitation for a steam room romp. Nonetheless, it was tough to determine if this was in fact Hasselhoff hiding behind a pair of blatantly European sunglasses that screamed, "look what I picked up in Germany while launching Baywatch: A Hawaiian Wedding." Moving to the stairmasters, gym on-lookers stared, aghast not at the atrophied arms nor because an appearance at Easton was the ultimate sign that his divorce proceedings had hit rock bottom. And no, they were not stunned to see the same man they had just seen on YouTube sucking in his abs while blabbering drunkedly on a Las Vegas hotel room floor. No, they simply appeared unsure that the man whose auburn hair looked like it's been dyed one too many times was in fact Hasselhoff. However, the international recording artist quickly confirmed his presence by breaking out his Motorola Razr and spending most of his workout yammering away to no one of particular interest, including when he moved to the ab mat area where he showed off his clunky early-90s K-Swiss and stretched-tight tube socks look.

· Timothy Dalton (!) coming out of the Cinerama Dome on Sunday after the 1:50 showing of Spiderman 3. He was with a boy of about 10, presumably his son, and looked pretty darn good for 63 (according to IMDB). After taking a look at the line for the parking self-pay machine, he opted to skip it and head for his car. (He made the right choice, too — that stupid machine was possessed.)

· I saw unabashed closet refugee TR Knight at the West Hollywood whole foods on friday afternoon. I heart TR, and TR hearts carbohydrates (he was buying enough cereal to last him through a nuclear winter). Doing something strange with his hair, though. It was a krazy ketchup red. Maybe he and Katherine Heigl have sleepovers where they listen to Ace of Base, play "do dump or marry" and dye their hair with Kool-Aid.

· I saw Ed Begley Jr. eating at Malo on Sunset in Silverlake Saturday night at about 10PM with a few other people. Even sitting down, he looked like he belongs in the NBA.

· Saw Ryan the Temp from The Office (BJ Novak, thanks IMDB) sitting on the patio at Birds last Tuesday (May 8th). He was with two beautiful girls, which I don't understand because he looks like a troll.

Also saw New Kid on the Block Joey McIntyre in baby blue strutting confidently down Larchmont on Sunday just after seven. He was strutting so confidently that it almost took away from the fact that he appeared to be talking to himself. He went into the Rite-Aid or CVS or whatever that is, and I didn't follow him.

· In the middle of the mind numbing crush of humanity that is Ikea in Burbank on a Saturday afternoon (May 12) I spotted Sally Struthers pushing a full cart down the self-service warehouse aisle. She looked bewildered and angry at her decision to enter the madness, but so did I & most everyone else.