What US Weekly's List Of Star Virgins Reveals About Teenage Girls
Putting together a celebrity slideshow isn't for the faint of heart: just ask our own Molly McAleer, whose titanic work in the pursuit of compilations could kill a lesser man (and has — don't ask us about that intern in '06). So how do you survive filling out an eleven-page slideshow when your subject is that most rarest of species: celebrity virgins? Well, if you're an employee at Us Weekly, you cheat a little, padding your list with both non-virgins and non-celebrities alike! Hard-nosed investigative analysis after the jump:
First of all, let's eliminate a few. Out of Us Weekly's list of twelve star virgins, at least two are famously deflowered: the indefatigable Britney Spears and the formerly married Jessica Simpson. And though we can't be sure Gary Coleman has finally done the deed, we'd like to believe his wedding (and Al Roker's prodding) may have helped hasten things along. That leaves us with nine star virgins, and three of those are the Jonas Brothers. Take them out of the equation, and you're left with six separate celebrities, all of whom (it may not surprise you to learn) are young and female. Yes, while we can't imagine that a reporter would ever ask, say, Phil of the Future if he'd given it up yet, apparently the world would fall off its axis if even one famous teen girl neglected to reveal the state of her hymen. Let's hear it for sexual stereotypes and pernicious double standards!