Idiot manchild Jay Mariotti, who quit a highly paid job as a Chicago Sun-Times sports columnist in order to find work at one of these "web sites" he's heard so much about, has a job!

Mariotti—easily the most despised columnist in Chicago, if not in America, for his ill-informed opinions, delusions of grandeur, and the undeservedly cocky cut of his jib, will now be working as a columnist for AOL Sports. Earning as much as he was at the paper? Ha, ha, well nothing has been released on that, but, ha. Apparently Jay couldn't land that job at the rival Tribune he was discussing, but that hasn't stopped him from a little self-righteousness in his opening column today, defending how he quit his job in the most jerky fashion possible:

I resigned after the Games with a calm, professional letter, a decision that came mere months after I'd signed a contract extension. I guess I hurt some feelings. The boys called me a "rat," forgetting those 5,000 columns through the years. They accused me of using Beijing as vacation time ("Hey, kids, let's ditch Hawaii and hang out in a Communist country."). They let a few staff writers, who should focus on doing better work, react with rage reminiscent of Glenn Close in "Fatal Attraction." All because I handed back about a million bucks and wanted something more.

The internet is full of pricks, Jay. You'll fit right it. [Read up on Jay's illustrious history at Deadspin]