Wintour goes nuclear on the dancefloor. Halle Berry calls her soon-to-be ex a "loser." Charlie Sheen hands over custody. Ke$ha ruins a bat mitzvah. Tiger Woods' butt sweats. Wednesday's gossip roundup likes to party.

  • The Met Costume Institute Gala's after party featured the collision of several celebrity worlds: "Puffy jumped up and started rapping to 'All about the Benjamins.' He even grabbed Anna Wintour into the deejay booth. Finally, Usher and Justin [Timberlake] joined in." What do you with Wintour in the deejay booth? Does she dance like a drunken starlet? Hold a pair of headphones to her ear and nod to the beat? In other news, "Katy Perry was out of control. She was wearing a dress that had LED light, and the switch was near her boobs. She was literally having people grope her to turn the dress on." Inevitable. [P6]
  • Halle Berry waged a war of careerist attrition on soon-to-be ex-husband Gabriel Aubry: "Halle called him a loser. She'd rub it in his face that she's an Oscar-winning actress and he's just a model. He couldn't take it anymore." Don't let it get you down, Gabriel. As long as it you don't fall down and break that pretty face, we will tolerate your D-list fame. [Us]
  • After a long night of partying, Lindsay Lohan rolled out of bed and into court to finally attend that DUI deposition she missed twice. She won't lose the case by default now! Baby steps. [E!]
  • Downtrodden, may-soon-be-$3.5M-poorer Charlie Sheen finally gave Denise Richards full custody of their two kids. "Denise wanted full legal custody given Charlie's current marital turmoil, sobriety issues and criminal problems... and Charlie didn't put up a fight." [TMZ]
  • The wife of public-affair-admitter David Boreanaz wife may sue his blackmail-happy mistress for "alienation of affection," because the wife lives in Utah, and you can sue the lady who stole your husband, there. Utah: Patron state of the long-suffering wife. Mormon influence, probably. [Radar]
  • Ke$ha got $50K to sing at a rich New York child's party, and said, "Happy sweet sixteen!" but it was only the girl's bat mitzvah, so, awkward. [P6]
  • Levi Johnston finally paid off his $21,000 child support debt and has made good on every $1750 child support check since. He and Birstol are even being "civil," which is bittersweet because (1.) No more Wasilla Hillbilly soap opera, thus bitter (2.) Baby Tripp's world is harmonious, thus sweet. It's not his fault he was born into a shitshow. [TMZ]
  • He of the LiLo "firecrotch" video, Mischa the fat "hefer" tweet, and "Greasy Bear" nickname, oil heir Brandon Davis, is telling a lie about getting to first base with Avril Lavigne in a bathroom while her boyfriend (and his friend) Brody Jenner was one room over. Hopefully all three get in a fight over it, and total mutual destruction occurs. Barring that, just lock Brandon Davis in a closet or something. [P6]
  • Charlize and Keanu are so in love, they made out in front of TMZ's cameras, and you know it was real because he reached his hands into her coat, and if you weren't really in love with an obscenely gorgeous woman like Charlize, you would never try to cop a feel, never. [TMZ]
  • All of Hollywood's blondes want to coo sweet nothings in A-Rod's ear. He and girlfriend Cameron Diaz have been cozying up to Kate Winslet, Drew Barrymore, and Gwyneth Paltrow. Once a man has been loved by Madonna, blessed is he for life. [P6]
  • The corset Miley Cyrus wears in her new video cost $25,000. You could pay for a whole semester at Eugene Lang with that! Forcing a Disney star's cleavage to heave on camera is actually a better investment, though, in terms of giving back to huanity. [Us]
  • Tiger Woods played golf and his butt sweated. TMZ took a picture. Being famous must be so humiliating sometimes. [TMZ]
  • The lady who tried to sue Sacha Baron Cohen for ruining her BINGO game during the filming of Bruno and emotionally damaging her by swearing has lost her case and has to pay Cohen's legal fees. It must feel so satisfying when someone is ordered to pay your legal fees. It's like the judge says, "You just wasted everyone's time. Here are the billable hours; pay for it." [TMZ]