Incredibly vain parents are actually buying Huggies horrible denim diapers, so much so the brand regained the market share they recently lost to Pampers. This can only mean one thing: diaper war.

The battlefield will be littered with the corpses of Americas littlest citizens as some corporate giants arm themselves with the latest designer trends to woo image conscious parents to spend their money on fancy disposable "clothing" for their kids to poop in. Ad Age reports that Huggies' (owned by Kimberly-Clarke) share of the diaper market recently increased by 2%, mostly thanks to the sale of their limited edition denim diapers, selling 2 million packages of them to women who want their baby to be just as fashionable as their handbag. Pampers (a Procter & Gamble brand) just won't sit still and let those whippersnappers take over the market with their jeans! No, they have their own line of fashionable shitpads from designer Cynthia Rowley. Oh, this thing is going to get really messy really fast. Remember, when Luvs comes out with their line of Extra-Dry Vajazzlers with real Swarovski crystals, that you only have yourself to blame, America.