Woman Accused of Attacking Her Husband With Cupcakes
In an incident similar to the Great Roommate Buttering Caper of May 2011 in terms of messiness, domestic disruption, and—perhaps most remarkably—the involvement of a woman named Dawn, a Chicago wife has been arrested for hurling cupcakes at her husband during an argument. How sweet it isn't! ("It" being a difficult-sounding marriage.)
On three past visits to the home of Dawn and Arturo Montesdeoca, police have arrested Arturo for domestic battery or battery charges, reports the Chicago Tribune. This time around, however, Dawn was the alleged batterer—in two ways:
The fight started with a verbal quarrel about 7:45 p.m. at the home in the 4700 block of South Western Avenue, according to a police report, but escalated until the woman started hitting her husband over the head.
After that, she reached for the box of desserts and directed a fusillade of snack cakes at his head and body, her husband told police. Several of the confections apparently hit their mark, as the man's head and shirt were smudged with icing when officers arrived, according to a police report.
Arturo reportedly told police officers that he was "in fear" of his wife and asked them to arrest her. Dawn allegedly admitted to the attack, so the cops hauled her away. She faces a misdemeanor count of domestic battery and also has to submit to electronic monitoring, because ... the authorities are afraid she'll begin breaking into bakeries and start throwing desserts at people? How do you electronically monitor a person's cupcake hurling habits? Do. Not. Understand.
