Different balls have different weights, Alex Rodriguez learned on Sunday.

A New Jersey man is suing his former boss for allegedly yanking on one of his testicles during an off-site “team building” meeting, causing severe damage that led to three surgeries and an eventual amputation, the New York Post reports. The ball-busting boss was later fired, but the victim says coworkers made fun of him for being sans one nut.

Earlier today, ProPublica published a fascinating state-by-state breakdown of workers' comp benefits. Because of a lack of federal oversight, the compensation for the same injury varies tremendously depending on the state in which it occurred. For example, a worker in Illinois who lost an arm would receive as much as $439,858, while a worker in Alabama would receive only $48,840 for the same injury. This disparity in compensation holds true for other injuries, such as severed or crushed testicles.

Sometimes, if you are a dog, you are the dog with the ball. Usually, however, you are not. When there are two dogs and one ball, only one dog can have the ball. And there is nothing you can do to change that.

The regrettably named Norwegian underwear brand Comfyballs was all set to make its big debut in the U.S. this year when it was shut down by the country's patent and trademark office. A trademark on Comfyballs, USPTO argued, was just too vulgar for Americans to accept.

Dan Maurer—a man who's made headlines for his 100-pound scrotum—successfully had the growth removed in surgery last month. Among the things he looks forward to after rehabilitation is having sex with his wife for the first time in seven years.

A Michigan man whose swollen scrotum has grown to a weight of around 100 lbs. is about to get the life-changing surgery he needs. After living with a giant testicular mass for 10 years, he's finally raised the funds for an operation.

Michigan man Dan Maurer thought he had hit a dead end when his scrotum started to balloon in his late 20's (you young men take note: this could still happen to you). While he lost weight, per doctors' orders, his sac swelled. It now weighs about 100 lbs. Maurer didn't know what to do, and then he turned on TLC.

Well, let's just get on with it. Tyrone Bowd is a 24-year-old Australian man with scrotal lymphoedema, a condition that has inflated his sack to the size of a watermelon. He also, according to his mother, has an inverted penis.

If you get your nuts in a vise, you'll be lucky to have them in a sling afterwards. In fact, you'll be lucky to stay alive. It's physiology!

At least it is, according to his good friend James Franco's paint brush. That's not a euphemism. (Or is it?)

An Irish teen is in a coma after suffering a suspected heart attack when another boy gave him a vigorous ball-squeeze as a lunchtime prank.

In the tradition of DoubleDickDude and The Man With No Ass Crack, another man with freakish genitals has taken to Reddit to show off his odd goods. World, meet a guy who has three testicles.

Though Democrats currently control the White House, we must remember that the pendulum will inevitably swing the other way eventually. So it behooves us all to hear the cry of Republicans: "We like balls in our face, yes. But not this many."

On Friday, the Duchess of Cambridge participated in a military training exercise designed to prepare Britain for an air assault by balls. [Image via AP]

Wesley Warren Jr.'s ball sac was about the size of a dolphin's head. It made him into something of a viral star. He appeared on shows like TLC's Strange Sex, and was interviewed for articles claiming he enjoyed the fame resulting from his scrotal lymphedema. He waddled everywhere with an upside down hoodie between his legs and sometimes used his scrotum as a mobile table, off which he'd eat food. He lived with this condition for about five years, which he blames on the healthcare system.

A Swedish lawmaker named Lars Ohly wanted to show off his new tattoo on Instagram. He didn't realize until publication that his genitals were also in the photograph.

It is completely unthinkable that the gentleman above, a kindly Massachusetts fellow wearing a TEABAG THE RAGS shirt with the New York Rangers logo shaped like a pair of testicles, would ever remove his genitals from his pants and show them to strangers. Especially not mere hours after last Sunday's Bruins-Rangers playoff game.

"Piggy poop balls," the internet's most famous and moving photograph of a pig whose own poop is sitting on its shelf-like balls, has appeared in such storied publications as Gawker, Deadspin, and Gawker since it first appeared online in 2011. And now, it finally has a backstory, thanks to Buzzfeed's Katie Notopoulos, who tracked down Jeff Reardon, the man who photographed the pig with poop on its balls:

Gawker is on a quest to determine the most racist city in America. Your contributions are vital to the cause. Please add your insights in the discussion system below. Or if you'd like to nominate another city please send an email here. Today...Boston, Mass.