What has turned into one of the highest-rated Real World seasons in years has also proven to be the most debaucherous. In previous seasons, we've seen more than our fair share of alcoholics, sexists and good girls gone bad, but the current 20th season cast has every problem child type all living together in one (environmentally friendly!) abode. Just rounding the halfway mark, the show has already kicked out two roommates: charismatic online audition winner Greg was given the heave-ho weeks ago, and naive little bully Joey left for drug treatment after admitting he was a daily cocaine and ecstasy user. And finally, the bratty and conservative Sarah succumbed to the tried-and-true Good Girl Drenches Hollywood In Vomit And Venom plot line, brilliantly set to Jim Morrison’s angst-ridden shouts and ending with an adorably retro Charles Barkley reference.

Country star Tim McGraw drew cheers and admiring headlines yesterday when he snatched an unruly fan out of the audience and tossed him aside like a big sack of jerkness. But he's hardly the first famous singer who had to stop a show in order to manhandle a crazy audience member. Fans run on stage, throw bottles, and scream insults—and sometimes, the band fights back. The stars on stage almost always win. Eagle-eyed Gawker video chief Richard Blakeley has compiled ten clips of Famous Band Vs. Stupid Fan violence, from the Rolling Stones to Akon. Click to watch, and learn your lesson.

Gary the Puppet — who in the clip embedded below tours the offices of Tumblr, Next New Networks, Gawker, CollegeHumor, and Wallstrip — might be the perfect metaphor for the New York tech scene. It makes a big show of itself, but it's kind of flimsy and despite how it may look, somebody much larger and more powerful is actually running things. For New York tech, the puppeteer's hand is old media companies. IAC and CBS own College Humor and Wallstrip, respectively. Tumblr has its roots in Hanna-Barbera cartoons. So does Next New Networks, which just agreed to distribute its videos over Hulu, a News Corp. and NBC joint venture. And what's Gawker but a tape worm in Old Media's belly? Still, New York tech has this over the Valley: perhaps because of those old media connections, it knows how to present itself with a hokey smirk instead of new media's typical sassback.

If you ever selected a plastic surgeon or LASIK doctor based on a random YouTube video, it's probably apt that that video only happened as a result of an under-the-table payment and the doctor was really incompetent and now you walk around blind and ugly. But what about the victims of the future? Plenty of doctors have gone right ahead and offered patients rebates or huge discounts in exchange for posting glowing videos about their procedures online, although something like that would be patently unethical in the "regular" media. Docs are like, "Huh, rules, really? I just thought it would be nice!" Patients are like, "Sweet, cheap surgery!" The loser is you, the affluent, narcissistic consumer. A couple of typical videos are after the jump; just because "a famous celebrity (name undisclosed for privacy)" gets LASIK from Dr. Feinerman doesn't mean you have to, too:

· If the Mini-Me sex tape wasn't enough to convince you to abstain from sex for the rest of your life, this clip of The Ladies Of The View debating whether or not to go topless in Vegas likely will. [The View]
· Remember that scene in One Crazy Summer where Savage Steve Holland's "cute and fuzzy bunnies" turned into mass murdering psychos? Well, this is kind of like that, only for real. [Videogum]
· Has modern life killed the semi-colon? We're not sure ... but we do know that ellipses are more popular than ever... [Slate via Fimoculous]
· The naming rights for the historic Los Angeles Coliseum are for sale. Here's hoping Jumbo's Clown Room starts up a collection fund, 'cause that's one cause we'd totally contribute to. [LA Observed]
· The missing link between Kanye West and Gary Busey has finally been discovered. And that link is ... squid brains? [Detroit News]

Hey, it's Molls. Grambone is letting me write my own post today, which is probably a huge mistake. That's fine! We all make mistakes! Like in this video I burnt my friend Alexis on her elbow with my Marlboro Light. Or like two years ago when I forgot my mother's birthday, which coincidentally is today. Happy Birthday, Mom. Thanks for letting me feed off of your body for nine months. Honestly, your body was the best I've ever lived inside. Anyway, Taco-flavored kisses, a background shot of a creepy dude in a two tone hat who hit on us and your Wednesday To-Dos after the jumpskis...

Click to viewSex tapes. We've all seen them. Hell, by this point, we've probably all made them (and that includes Molls)! But even on your loneliest of lonely nights, when you dial up RedTube in search of the dirtiest, kinkiest porn that the Internets have to offer, we'd bet you dollars to donuts that none of you ever typed the words "Mini-Me Sex Tape" into Google looking to get off. That is, until now. According to our friends at TMZed:

Jessica Simpson has officially perfected the art of turning every opportunity to promote whatever is currently going on in her “career” into a public display of desperation. Ever since that gruesome Chicken Or Fish fiasco, we cannot think of a single time the game day curse has appeared on television without making a complete ass of herself. And Jessica managed to continue the pity parade on The View today. Dodging all questions related to her shockingly successful new country single, Simpson instead spun the interview into an embarrassingly blatant attempt to announce to the world how totally in love she and long-suffering QB Tony Romo still are. See Simpson hard at work, and tell us if we’re the only ones noticing a very eerie resemblance between the new Jessica and the bleached, gum-chewing, tear-drenched Britney Spears circa her “We’re just country, y’all!” era.

The last time Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter ever met with Gonzo god Hunter S. Thompson, the drug-vacuuming writer was sitting in a hotel one morning with "a tumbler of scotch, a bowl of cocaine, and some cereal." He asked Graydon what he would like. So did the patrician editor hoover up some massive lines or what? Well, he prefaces his answer by telling Charlie Rose, "I'm such a pussy." Sigh. Click to watch the tale of Gonzo vs. Non-Gonzo in action

When she's not involved in ex-presidential dalliances (allegedly!) and lobbing litigious bombs at the journalists who write about them, Gina Gershon is something of a Broadway dreamer. To wit, the sultry star's more authorized revelation that she's considered adapting Showgirls for the stage. But just throwing a bitchy NC-17 melodrama on the boards wouldn't be enough, naturally, so behold Showgirls: The Broadway Musical: "Originally I had an idea to do that, and I was talking to a couple of people to write it with me," she told Broadway.com. "If it's my version, it would be great. If it's a dumb version, it would be dumb." We really don't see how a smart version of Showgirls is logically possible, and unless it features a showstopping Joe Eszterhas/Paul Verhoeven duet simply called "Tits," we're probably not even interested. Nevertheless, best of luck to Gershon, and may her Vanity Fair score-settling yield the leverage she needs to make Tony-ready magic. [Broadway.com via Film Experience]

All it really takes to loosen up David Letterman is a blonde (though he's been known to make exceptions) in a cleavage-enhancing dress—and bam!—the curmudgeonly late night king instantly morphs into a goofy-grinned, homeroom study partner, showering the object of his affection with a variety of softball questions and a generous selection of tinned meats. Take Charlize Theron's appearance last night, the first third of which covered how nice she looks in her dress, before segueing into the weightier topic of what she wants for her birthday. Letterman reassured the actress that he was "sending you something right now," suggesting he was stowing a Pick-Me-Up Bouquet right under his desk all along! Get it? It's his engorged penis! "Every single holiday Dave's dick in a box/Over at your parent's house Dave's dick in a box/Mid day at the grocery store Dave's dick in a box /Backstage at the CMA's Dave's dick in a box (yeah-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow)..."

The state of American game-show relations achieved a dizzying new high Tuesday night when Ice-T, Joan Rivers and their respective broods faced off in a very special episode of Celebrity Family Feud. It hardly seemed a sure thing at first; we doubted Ice and host Al Roker could outdo their tasteful wife-for-hire exchange at the top of the show, or that Rivers could overcome the tremulous, post-Russell Crowe Fucking SlutGate gunshyness in time to produce for a national audience. But the rapper more than picked up the slack in the very first feud, wringing potty-mouthed ignominy from Roker's loaded solicitation, "Name something that's slippery and hard to hold on to." And while we may never know the true degree of Ice's ensuing, bleeped filth or his earlier, "Watch it, Al" threat to Richard Dawson's debauched spiritual heir, the possibility that we could love again after The Moment of Truth was never clearer or more reassuring. [NBC via RedLasso]

Visa will launch a microsite for small businesses called Visabusinessnetwork.com. To market the site, Visa purchased $2 million worth of Facebook advertising to give away in $100 chunks for the first 20,000 small businesses joining the site. Visa marketers are telling reporters that Facebook is full of small business, many of which depend on the site for internal communications. But this deal isn't about analytics or numbers. It's about Visa showing its hip enough to market on Facebook and a Facebook ad sales team smart enough to put a big $2 million price tag on the privilege. Put it this way: We're pretty sure somebody bought someone else a steak in order to get this deal done, and frankly, it makes us a little proud. We know moving past do-it-yourself dashboards and one-click purchases isn't easy in a Web world run by Google search advertising.

When Yahoo CEO Jerry Yang first heard that Microsoft was withdrawing its offer to buy the company, he reportedly high-fived his fellow negotiators — co-founder David Filo likely among them. The moment palm struck palm, if frozen in time, perhaps captures Yang at his zenith, a triumphant founding entrepreneur and Valley icon warding off Microsoft invaders from North. One Yahoo employee even celebrated Yang's fight with a spoof on the film 300, subbing Yang in for Leonidas and having him scream "Yahoooo!" instead of "Sparta!" My oh my has Yang's reputation tumbled since. The latest bump: a parody of Coldwell Banker Real Estate commercials featuring Google cofounders Larry Page and Sergey Brin discussing how "Yahoo Is Now Our Bitch," below. The employee who made the 300 parody? He quit.

As this video from CurrentTV explains, most banner ads aren't all that dangerous — "provided you leave them alone and avoid eye-contact" — they're just bad inventory, senselessly inflating the third-party ad network bubble and pushing CPM prices to the bottom of the barrel by insuring supply outpaces marketer demand. But some breeds of banner ads are more dangerous yet — the motorskills test, the shaking ad and the celebrity-features quiz. Observe them in this video below, if you dare.

Anderson Cooper was talking last night about fundamentalist Christian attacks on Barack Obama with minister Al Sharpton, author Roland Martin and Family Research Council President Tony Perkins. The talk turned toward religious tolerance, and suddenly Sharpton was outing CNN's prettiest anchor as, gosh, some kind of sinner? "I might think what you do, Anderson, is going to put you in hell, but I'm going to defend your right to get there," Sharpton said. Then everyone laughed, either because Sharpton made some kind of innocuous joke outing Cooper as a typical shouting-head TV news sinner, or because virulent, institutionalized homophobia is hilarious. Anderson blushed and managed to say something dignified, while maybe secretly wishing he was officially gay so he could let loose a verbal spanking that would make Keith Olbermann's "Special Comments" sound like bedtime stories The End. Clip after the jump. UPDATE: Changed a sentence to make it clear Sharpton might not have been alluding to Cooper's sexuality.

People still profess confusion about which ad man had his way with JC Penney's image, making an unauthorized teen sex ad and submitting it to the Cannes Lions International Advertising Festival. Neither the pissed-off retailer nor its apologetic ad agency would name names, and Ad Age yesterday concluded, "Just who is responsible for creation of the ad... is a bit cloudy." But it's not, really. Is it? It's got to be Mike Long, of Epoch Films. Read why, and watch one of Long's other "fake" Penney ads, this one a bit terrifying, after the jump.

· And we love it! All together now: "My drain was clogged/Sink full of goo/It was fixed real fast/by ADEE do!" [adeedo.com]
· Slate's piece suggesting UA doctored a Tom Cruise photo to make him look more like his Hitler-hunting alter ego never factored in the possibility that they were actually looking at a different portrait of Claus von Stauffenberg. Score one for the good guys! [AP]
· "What do we want! Safer pole conditions and a bigger cut of the champagne room backend! When do we want it? As soon as our Spearmint Rhino set is up!" [Radar]
· Heather Locklear is seeking treatment for anxiety and depression. But she looks fabulous in a two-piece at 46! What hope do the rest of us have? [Reuters]
· Some robots get laid more than other robots. [YouTube]
· Bonus Link: Jack Stephan's spot after the jump!

For the first time in our Weeds-watching experience, we actually worried we’d gotten a contact high from watching last night’s Bizarro World episode. As soon as we realized this would be the only time we’d seen the show open without “Little Boxes” setting the carefree tone, replaced by an opening sequence set at the Mexican border, Nancy uneasily waltzing around high as a kite on a beach, it became clear that our Weeds is even more potent than usual. Though we still haven’t accepted the fact that much of this highly-rated season will take place in Mexico as the Botwins run from the law, we were finally able to shake our rising paranoia upon seeing the indefatigable Elizabeth Perkins appear looking nothing like the Celia we’ve loved, hated, then loved again. Imagine a young Bette Midler dressed up as little orphan Annie, styled by Mexico’s answer to Rachel Zoe, grab the nearest pillow in the likely instance you find yourself needing to scream, and get high on this clip (no substances required).

While some of you probably believe that Intrepid Defamer Videographer Molly McAleer's life consists solely of mornings filled with mimosas and evening's spent behind the velvetiest of velvet ropes, the fact of the matter is that she puts her pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of you (that is, when she's actually wearing pants). Although it may seem glamorous bringing you each night's To Do's, at the end of each and every month, she has to pay her bills, too. Unfortch for Molls, she isn't so good with balancing her checkbook. Which is exactly why she invited her friend Mel Cowan, comedian and financial whiz, over last night. The results are predictably hilare. Enjoy!