Kim Kardashian's bare, oily ass continues to make huge waves in the art world. First, some guy printed it out and taped it to a coffee maker, and now some other guy has recreated it as a painting, using his dick as a brush. Art!

Taylor Swift, normal girl, continued her campaign to remind the world she's totes relatable and down-t0-earth by playing a tweenage dork in Jimmy Fallon's recurring teen girl stereotype segment, "Ew!"

A faux-"natural" mother brags about leaving her newborn attached for days to its placenta, which she wrapped in disgusting PCB-laden industrial synthetic plastic bags till it finally fell off. That "musty smell" is the Goddess dying of chemical poisoning, you monster.

A weatherman who apparently needed to be taught not to eat things you find on the floor learned that lesson the hilarious way today when he accidentally ate his own cat's vomit on live television.

You may have forgotten the legendary gross-out porn-turned-viral video sensation "2 Girls, 1 Cup" — which sparked a wave of "reaction videos," some of which are compiled above — but the American justice system hasn't. (Poor American justice system, too, because, man, is that video disgusting.) Yesterday, Ira Isaacs, the man behind "2 Girls, 1 Cup" (though hopefully not in that way) was sentenced to four years in prison after being convicted on five counts of felony obscenity in April 2012.

A British teen was enjoying a "Gladiator box meal" at his local KFC when he suddenly stumbled onto something he didn't order.

Let me just preface everything here by saying that, as someone who is dumb enough to still subscribe to Entertainment Weekly, I deserve pretty much everything I get. In the age of affordable tablets and comprehensive pop culture sites like the AV Club and Vulture, anyone still paying $50 a year for Entertainment Weekly just so they have something to read at the gym is a moron. I get all that. Your scorn is accepted and understood.

In case you missed it: Late Night with Jimmy Fallon host Jimmy Fallon and Magic Mike's Channing Tatum star as best besties Sara and Susie in Teen Nick's new teen talk show for teen girls, Ew!

You know what season this is? It's hot dog season. Winter's over, baseball's spring training has begun, and people are wearing shorts again. Here in New York, it is time for hot dogs.

Looking for new ways to stymy your appetite? Try the FDA's Food Defect Action Levels Handbook, a great new diet book guide for food distributors and inspectors. It details exactly how many maggots a comestible good may contain before it gets banned for "aesthetic" reasons, i.e., "being too icky."

Vitaliy Sulzhik bought a can of Monster Energy at his local supermarket and drank it. Then, according to MSNBC, this happened:

The last time Dr. Oz saw Jimmy, he offered to personally remove a mole from his hand. Because Dr. Memhet Oz films across the hall from Late Night, Jimmy popped in to the studio today to actually do it.

This poor guy on a Dutch television show is trying to guess different smells in total darkness. He thinks he has in the bag until there is one smell that he just can't quite figure out.

In your drenched Wednesday media column: the NYT pay wall draws near, a royal wedding can't sell magazines any more, Anderson Cooper reams an old Texas man, James Hibberd moves to EW, and Romenesko is all weird now.

Sara Vilkomerson, the former culture editor of the New York Observer, has been hired as a senior writer at EW. Staff memo below:

TV columnist Michael Ausiello is leaving EW to start his own site. This memo is going out to EW staffers:

A 28-year-old man spent an hour trapped on top of a bulldozer after it pitched into a 15-foot-deep manure pit while he was driving it. He should feel lucky: People would pay good money on Craigslist for this. (pic via)

Oh. My. God. If you're easily disturbed, this video—in which a mother enlists her two young sons to help with a raunchy-as-hell amateur video to Yo Gotti's "5 Star Chick"—is not for you. Otherwise, come on in!

Have you heard the dirtiest, nastiest, Naziest rumor about Sandra Bullock and Jesse James? It involves anal sex, the barrel of a shotgun, a Hitler poop-stache, and a video camera. It's a Freudian nightmare come to life. It's a myth.

In Manhattan's "sublet/temp wanted" section of Craigslist, we find "director needs room": "I am looking for a room/apt. for myself and my daughter. We share a bed. Prefer midtown for UWS." Is that you, Woody Allen? Screenshot and Update.