All three Kardashians blow off Kris Humphries' plus-size model sister. Mila Kunis gets hacked. A naked man with a Fudgesicle broke into Nicolas Cage's house. Padma Lakshmi bombs at an open mic night. Thursday gossip turns up its nose.
Writing for the Atlantic, reporter Marc Herman has meticulously reconstructed the story of Qaddafi loyalists deliberately murdering three civilians—including a six-year-old and an eight-year-old—in cold blood and at point blank range. "The soldier fired, shooting the six-year-old boy through the side of his chest as Abrar held him. The boy slumped over and the soldier fired again into his back, sending the bullet to exit through the child's stomach." Awful.
America's national embarrassment will continue to take over our lands and townships with another song. Also today: bad news for Anderson, decent news for Sarah, and great news for twentysomethings.
Like a runaway train on a runaway track, Fashion Week is still hurtling into the horizon, wrecking everything in its path. Well, it's at least littering it with sequins and empty champagne bottles. Let's look at today's flotsam and jetsam.
Congressman Louie Gohmert of Texas, whom some might call a "character," is working hard for the American people today, by pulling a middle-school-level prank on the president! You know how Obama keeps demanding that Congress pass his American Jobs Act right now? Well, Louie Gohmert filed his own bill under that very name this afternoon. What a funnyman! This is a game-changer.
It's a time-honored tradition for reports at gay newspapers or magazines to ask straight celebrities, "If you played for the other team, who would you want to sleep with?" It's like that will make them slightly more gay or something. But everyone seems to have a celebrity they want to bone who is not of the gender they usually bone. Who's yours?
In your even-keeled Wednesday media column: masthead changes at the NYT, women vs. men in journalism, the WSJ loves video, Shep Smith's pad is for sale, and News Corp paper analyzes James Murdoch's future.
Amanda Seyfried loves sex scenes, particularly an "extreme close-up" of herself rubbing tongues with Megan Fox. Olivia Wilde says she needs "four vaginas." Lil' Wayne talks Tea Party. Scarlett Johansson faces a naked picture scandal. Wednesday gossip needs a cold shower.
The live web show launched as "What's Trending at cbsnews.com" is now simply known as "What's Trending," all because CBS News got all freaked out about one silly false report that the most famous CEO in the world had tragically died.
You may not give a flying caftan that it's still Fashion Week, but all the very fashionable people and retail stores and models and kids who go to FIT care, so we have to appease them with some photos of the goings on, don't we? Yes, we certainly do.
Finally, Facebook is helping users create a list of real friends inside their official friends list. There's no need to share everything with everyone, after all. But watch out, because people will know when they're downgraded to your D-list. (Update below.)
Megan Fox reassures the world that she is neither robot nor android. Underlings must "turn their faces to a wall" when Madonna walks by. Jane Lynch started smoking at the age of 12. Demi Moore tweets a "topless" picture. Tuesday gossip is practicing human emotions.
Remember that emperor penguin that somehow turned up on the shores of New Zealand after getting lost off the coast of Antarctica? Besides giving it the least original name of all time (Happy Feet? Seriously?), conservasionists set the penguin free on September 4, and were monitoring its progress with a satellite transmitter. Only problem: they superglued the transmitter to the penguin's feathers. Some not so happy thoughts from the AP:
Isn't it just cute, at the end of the day? The Tea Party Express got their very own presidential debate in Florida, thanks to the suckers at CNN. They'll be asking only the best questions, like "What will you do about United Nations Agenda 21?" and "Will you salt the ground over NPR's building after defunding and destroying it?" Oh, golly. Pour a shot of whiskey up your nostril and let's watch!
The perky one-time Disney queen continues to get work despite a string of bombs. Also today: the possible return of Robert Zemeckis, the likely return of Carrie Bradshaw, and the disappearance of Andrew Garfield.
