Simon Cowell fondly recalls a successful date with "wacko" Denise Richards. Did Lady Gaga hook up with a tween idol? Madonna defends her right to hate hydrangeas. What did Ali Lohan do to her face? Thursday gossip has questions.
Fashion's Night Out can be so tedious: the crowds, the celebs, the free champagne, the lack of sales. God, it just seems like too much bother. We're going to skip it altogether, but in order to do so we need your help. Join our Scavender Hunt, take pictures from the event, and you can win cash!
Here's a fun exercise in "Hey, whatever happened to…?" After seventeen years of nonstop blowjob jokes, Monica is still unemployed and alone, living in her parents' houses and relying on her family's money, according to the National Enquirer. (So take it with a cigar tube of salt.) Since her handbag line never took off, she is reportedly considering a wildly incongruous career in PR. The Daily Mail reports,
Bruce Springsteen’s The Rising has become, as the tenth anniversary of the attacks that inspired it approaches, the closest thing we have to an official soundtrack to 9/11. It is the “soaring musical statement” of that day’s impact on our national psyche, according to the Philadelphia Inquirer’s music critic. New Yorkers selected it in a poll conducted by WNYC as one of the top three records they want to hear on the radio on the anniversary. High school teachers are using it to evoke the visceral pain and confusion of that day for their clueless students. The problem with this is that The Rising is a terrible, bad, no-good record that cheapens us all.
Madonna takes a passive-aggressive swipe at Lady Gaga. Ryan Gosling makes out with Eva Mendes. Jake Gyllenhaal snuggles a Twilight star. A wild man breaks into Celine Dion's home and pillages for pastries. Wednesday gossip is mad for madeleines, moonstruck for doughnuts, cuckoo for choux.
Taser International, producer of the greatest non-lethal law enforcement tool known to man, is rapidly expanding its empire to include a new video surveillance system called Axon that records response calls by law enforcement. This should help with court cases when cops are unfairly accused of brutality. But you know what's totally unfair? All of these negative, sensational stories about tasers. This constant negativity is overshadowing the great contributions that tasers have made to society over the years. According to Taser International CEO Rick Smith, who spoke with Fortune about the company's rebranding efforts, stories about taser-related deaths and such are totally unfair:
Yahoo's cursing CEO Carol Bartz is out the door — and just sent staff an email saying she's been fired over the phone. It looks like AOL isn't the only loser tech company with a clusterfuck on its hands this week.
For the unlucky ones, the losses of 9/11—even ten years on—remain unspeakable. For the rest of us, in addition to mayhem and horror, that day unleashed a bevy of irritations and annoyances that continue to reverberate across the years—and are quite speakable. Here's what we have 9/11 to thank for.
Surprise: Wildly unprofitable money pit Groupon canceled its investor roadshow and withdrew its IPO schedule, says the Wall Street Journal. Also, there's a new SEC inquiry into the company. But everything will be back on track just as soon as the tech bubble returns, honest!
One of morningtime's most familiar faces will be gone in just a matter of weeks. Also today: a literary adaptation with some promise, Jay Mohr tries again, and the board game craze continues.
MediaTakeout gives birth to a surprisingly catchy conspiracy theory: "The word behind the scenes at the VMAs was that Beyonce was wearing a PROSTHETIC BELLY." She's only eight weeks pregnant, MediaTakeout says, but remember that they also said Beyonce was several weeks pregnant in March 2010. Maybe fetuses age in reverse dog years?
Before she was Tiger Woods' mistress and a member of Dr. Drew's Celebrity Rehab harem, Rachel Uchitel was the 9/11 widow featured in an iconic Associated Press photograph that appeared on frontpages of newspapers the world around. As the ten-year anniversary of her former fiance's death approaches, Uchitel reflects on her loss:
Where were you on that fateful September day when America's innocence was lost? Never forget: 9-5-11, when Soulja Boy said a shitty freestyle line that was disrespectful to the U.S. Army. Will we ever heal?
Adele vomits constantly, but it's more anxiety disorder than eating disorder. Madonna ridicules a fan on an open mic. Alyson Hannigan isn't pregnant, just bloated. Alexander Skarsgard growls at girls. Tuesday gossip is body conscious.
Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of the more amusing shots from the past week.
It gets boring and tedious typing mean things about celebrities and what they're wearing. So we decided to give our fingers a rest for a change. Welcome to Gawkerazzi, where we talk shit about famous people in paparazzi pictures, magazine spreads, and other fashiony situations.
