On Friday, we stuck you with some relatively challenging blind items; after a weekend of cockteasing, we're ready to go ahead with the results.

A former green beret has told the National Enquirer that "Measure of a Man" singer Clay Aiken read his man measurements on a gay internet personal ad and arranged a steamy, man-on-effeminate-AM radio-friendly-songstylist encounter:

From today's Page Six:

Earlier today, we charged you with the task of figuring out today's blind items from Page Six. Thankfully, you darlings are more reliable than our menstrual cycle, and so we've got some purely speculative answers.

Among our many problems in life, two of the biggest are these: We are not very good interviewers, and we are not very good gays. Tonight, it seems, we shall have a chance to work on both problems — and, even better, with drinks!

A slew of gems from today's Page Six:

Larry Wachowski, the half of the Matrix trilogy writer-director sibling team who is widely rumored to have had a sex change, and is currently shacking up with a dominatrix by the name of Ilsa Stix, clearly isn't screwing around when it comes to his "alternative lifestyle" existence. But with their upcoming movie, V for Vendetta, soon to unleash a shorn Natalie Portman onto the world, the spotlight-shirking filmmaker will inevitably have to contend with the fact that his life is about to become an open, though deeply confusing, book:

Yes, Mr. Blackwell and his "Worst Dressed" list have become the somewhat derided butt of many a joke for all of us living in our savvy, internetsy culture. But let us give the fellow his due! His annual what-once-passed-for-catty proclamations of the stunningly obvious, now in their 46th year ("Claudette Colbert? More like Clueless Colbert!"), have trailblazed a path for the Steven Cojocarus of the world, and for this, well, we acknowledge and quickly move on. But enough preamble: To the winners' circle! Number one with a zingy bullet was "over the hill Lolita" Britney Spears, followed by Mary-Kate Olsen ("Bag lady rags?!" As if!), and recent divorcee Jessica Simpson, whom, he writes, "resembles a cut-rate Rapunzel slingin' hash in a Vegas diner." This last description at first left us confused, then somewhat depressed when we realized that Mr. Blackwell is suffering from advanced geriatric dimentia. By the time we had made it to his description of Renee Zellweger looking like "a painted pumpkin on a pogo stick," much of the pleasure had been drained out of the entire proceeding. Yes, we love an occasional slice of sassy, but not when it's served between two pieces of crazy, rambling, old-people bread.

• Morgan Stanley boots 4 employees after they accompanied clients to a strip club. Apparently this touches on Morgan Stanley's touchy gender discrimination issues, but we find it just as offensive to assume a female staffer wouldn't want to take the high rollers to Scores. [Wall Street Folly]
• After three years of delightly offensive and brilliantly entertaining pro bono work, the Black Table throws in the towel and heads to rehab. [Black Table]
• Are they Yindies? Yupsters? Or just annoying fuckwit posers? [LA Weekly & Newsweek]
• A reasonably kind rationalization of your Life & Style habit, courtesy of Salon. [Salon]
• Slightly more pleasant than chugging glasses of Airborne. [Female First]
• Supermodel Kate Moss, always the bravest girl in Bolivia, agrees to return to London to speak with authorities about that whole cocaine thing. [Telegraph]
• Happy New Year, John Norris. You're gonna need it. [MisShapes]
• We may not LURVE New York's 101 restaurants, but we certainly wouldn't rather watch an episode of 2 and a Half Men instead. That's just crazy talk. [PDHyman]
• Club kid killer Michael Alig is baaack! [WOW]
• You can jack the price of hooch up all you want; it's not going to stop a single person from getting hammered at brunch. [Reuters]
• Get more for your money at Starbucks. [Slate]
• McSweeney's grows a precious new tentacle called Wholpin, for DVDphiles. [Cool Hunting]
• Is there any limit to the fun we can have at Tara Reid's expense? [Gallery of the Absurd]

Earlier, we asked:

By reader request, here's another thrilling episode of "Just Asking" courtesy of the street-pounders over at Page Six. (It was either this or a Gossip Round-up and frankly I see no reason for me to condense what you can easily skim on your own. Tough love, bitches.)

It's bad enough when the newspaper misspells your name. It's worse when your own newspaper misspells your name. And it's even worse when your own newspaper misspells your name on your own column.

First, the official news, straight from lowdown Lloyd Grove: He's got a new Hudette. The Lloydster emails:

Earlier, we asked the masses:

From today's Page Six:

From Craigslist, a dollop of fabulousity:

After two years of pregnancy, actress Michelle Williams has finally spit out actor Heath Ledger's baby girl, named Matilda (not a great name, but better than Inspektor Hazel and cute enough, we suppose, in an ugly hipster baby sort of way). The baby was born in Brooklyn, but the couple is otherwise incredibly private, so that's about all we've got for you on the matter. But? You can finally — finally! — stop spotting the previously ginormous version of Ms. Williams waddling around Brooklyn. And that, dear friends, is the miracle of life.

This morning we put the following blind items in your grubby hands:

A recent vacation autoreply on Page Sixer Fernando Gil's email, which showed up in our inbox today:

Today's Page Six has, quite possibly, THE MOST IMPORTANT BLIND ITEM EVER: