From one "Craig L." comes this missive:

I have a confession to make, folks. Remember that Julia Allison character, the New York-based TV commentator and magazine columnist who swept through town not long ago? Okay, yes, I'm technically gay and technically married, but the state nullified my marriage and Allison, more recently, nullified my gayness. We're totally going out. The apparent dalliances with TechCrunch editor Michael Arrington and Vimeo founder Jakob Lodwick? Just cover stories. Consider them Allison's beards. I'd post more but Julia's calling to me to reset her Wi-Fi connection. I don't have the heart to tell her I can't program my way out of a paper bag.

I haven't seen the actual demographics, but I'd be shocked if TechCrunch's readership, like every other tech site, is anything but crushingly male. Which makes Valleywag reader Mark Mercado's sighting of an ad for Fashion Bug, the discount women's retailer, on the tech-review site quite curious. Either Federated Media, TechCrunch's ad representative, is getting desperate and selling space to so-called "remnant" ad networks — the Ross Dress for Lesses of the online-advertising world — or Fashion Bug, in a savvy move, is marketing to cross-dressing entrepreneurs so desperate to get TechCrunch editor Michael Arrington's attention that they're willing to doll themselves up like Julia Allison, the New York tartlet who made a recent Bay Area tour.

We bitch and moan about the stresses of this job a lot—mediocre pay (not Observer-bad, but still!), little sleep, getting slapped around by a hot and crabby gay—but perhaps the most frightening aspect of working at Gawker occurs in those random moments when Star Editor-at-Large Julia Allison pops up on the IM to drop some knowledge. So, fine, we're spreading the agony around.

Is it true that Jakob Lodwick, the founder of IAC-controlled online-video site Vimeo, has gone on several dates with notorious nobody Julia Allison, the TV commentator and magazine columnist whose brief visit terrorized Silicon Valley and left desperately horny TechCrunch editor Michael Arrington so heartbroken he apparently threw himself into another woman's arms? Just think: Allison traveled thousands of miles to find a geek to love, and there were plenty of eligible nerd bachelors in New York all the while. From the shirtless photo he posted of himself, we can kind of see why Allison might go for him. Add to that IAC stock options and the ability to design a blog, and we'd say she's got herself quite a catch. Make a serious play for Jakob, Julia, before Barry Diller does. (Photo by Jakob Lodwick)

When unaging (at least around the face!) PR doyenne Peggy Siegal throws a movie party in the Hamptons, she bizarrely expects you to see whatever movie she's working on. On Sunday, it was some Jaime Foxx action flick called The Kingdom. When we rolled up for her party at Savannah's in Southampton about ten minutes before the movie ended, no one was in the restaurant yet. Peggy approached: Jackie Onassis meets Nan Talese meets Allison Janney. "Sorry, we're early!" said Deb Schoeneman, the editor in chief of Hamptons Style. Peggy's eyes were burning embers of annoyance in their deep sockets. "It's O.K. this time but not again. I'm in the movie business. Not the catering business," she said. Awkward! People arrived. Jeff Zucker, the short bald president of NBC Universal, worked the tables like a croupier.

It appears that Michael Arrington is no longer devastated by the abrupt departure on Tuesday of Julia Allison, the New York-based TV commentator he'd begged to stay in town after she flew in for his TechCrunch9 party. The TechCrunch editor has found a new lust object: Morgan Webb, host of WebbAlert, yet another online tech-news show with a busty host in the vein of Rocketboom. After the jump, the hilarious homina-homina that the horny hetero slipped into his review.

Julia Allison, the New York-based TV commentator, Time Out New York dating columnist, and Star editor-at-large, has escaped from the desperate, horny clutches of TechCrunch editor Michael Arrington and "decamped for LA," according to a source close to the matter. Well, some blogger who got a text message from her, anyway. Her plane touched down at the runway in Los Angeles at 1:36 p.m., and we all breathed a sigh of nerdy relief. That much fabulousness in so short a time? It's enough to make a backup generator abort its start sequence, if you know what I mean and I think you do. (Photo by Sashaphotography.com)

Attention, Valley residents: Julia Allison, the Star editor-at-large, TV commentator, and notorious nobody from New York, is still in the area. Valleywag has learned — from Allison herself! — that she cancelled plans to fly back yesterday at the behest of imperious TechCrunch editor Michael Arrington, who ordered her to "fucking stay." As startup entrepreneurs already know and Allison is learning, one disobeys Arrington at one's peril. So strap down your menfolk and lock away your sysadmins, people: Allison and companion Meghan Asha are still on the prowl. They're from the Big Apple, they're way underdressed for the weather, and they're not going to leave until they land a beau who can whip up a jazzy CSS file and upgrade them to Movable Type 4.0.

"Odds are also that there's someone hot in your office you've considered dating. And to that I say: Go for it," begins romance expert Julia Allison's latest Time Out NY column. After all, she reasons, if things ultimately don't pan out, "there is always another hedge fund, publishing house or law firm willing to harbor you should you need to, um, extricate yourself." Wow, spoken like someone who has never had a real job. Maybe there's a counterargument to be made here. And we know just the woman to make it! You guessed it: Stevie Nicks.

Regarding Julia Allison: "Please stop writing about her. She is dull, dull, dull, dull. Thanks in advance!" And another! "Please just fucking stop it already. Thanks." And more! "Could you guys do an intervention or something? It's kind of gross at this point."

Julia Allison, the Star editor-at-large whose Diane von Furstenberg dress made a chesty, low-cut appearance at Friday's TechCrunch9 party, where she was hunting for geek boyfriend/sysadmins, also turned up at Saturday's Laughing Squid "Paradise Lost" event. But apparently no one had told her anything about the event, held in San Francisco's down-and-out Bayview neighborhood — like the fact that it was a community-arts fundraiser. Here's what happened when the New York slickster tried to swan her way through the door without paying.

New York-based journalist and Star editor-at-large Julia Allison was a surprise guest at Friday's TechCruch9 event. Valley folks will likely have never heard her name, but she's famous in some East Coast circles. So why did Allison fly out to California specifically for Michael Arrington's soiree?

This weekend on CNN's "Reliable Sources"—one of television's only regular programs to examine how journalists do their jobs and how the media affect the stories they cover— took a look at the very important Lindsay Lohan DUI story. In a strident debate with Parade's Jeanne Wolf, Star Editor-at-Large Julia Allison insists that we're missing the real story: Lindsay Lohan is a reckless driver.

Julia Attempts to Lip Dub Fergie's Glamorous While Driving [Julia Allison and Vimeo]

Remember singlefiers, those telltalle signs of a lady's self- and other-unlovedness that clutter up her apartment? Well, it turns out that something-or-other At Large Julia Allison can tick quite a few of them off the list we all made yesterday. Is our Julia having a bit of a dry spell? Any eventual gentleman callers should be forewarned: Julia's fridge contains "5 month old 'beer for guests' because I don't really drink, and when I do, I definitely don't drink beer." Opt for a wine cooler to avoid staleness issues! That bed does look mighty inviting, though—aside from the dreaded bear.

Bachelorette Living, Sans Cat [Julia]

So our—well, not 'our,' but you know, 'everyone's'—Julia Allison has finally found a name for her Time Out New York dating column! No, it's not "Dumb Slut Adventures" or whatever your suggestion was. It's The Single File. What an ugly word that is, "single." What is it, exactly, that makes the word itself, and its connotations, so inadvertent-shudder-inducing? Maybe it's less about actually being single and more about the telltale signs of being uncoupled, hmm? You know ... singlefiers.

Star magazine editor-at-large Julia Allison sat down with the fine folks from Fox News horror-show "Red Eye" last night and brought her unique expertise to a subject rocking America's public debate right now: ass-grabbing. Turns out a certain celebrity (and thousands of complete nobodies) grabbed Ms. Allison's ample derriere at a recent social event! Who was it? To find out, you'll just have to watch the clip. Or, you know, read the headline above.

You've heard about that Obama girl video, right? Everyone's talking about it. But is it harmless fun or an insult to womanhood's long struggle to be considered equal to men? It's an issue driving a wedge between even the closest of friends—for instance, Huffington Post media critic Rachel Sklar and Star editor-at-large Julia Allison. We've obtained a transcript of a recent (private) clash they had on the subject, and we make it public here because, well, it's very important. Whose side are you on? The answer might surprise you!

So I'll be in Maine all next week, leaving you in the extremely fun and competent company of Doree, Choire, Josh, Balk, and Balk's cock, which will be picking up even more of my slack than it usually does. I had Gawker pervtographer Nikola Tamindzic snap a special picture of me being all "eff you, I am wearing an American Apparel tank suit" on his roof last night because, let's face it, I have become some delusional cross between Alyssa Shelasky and Julia Allison, blogging about my feelings and disgracing feminism right and left. Yeah, that's it. Also that's why it's time for a full break. Also, as a bit of useful service journalism: After the jump, an object lesson in how not to ask for time off.