• Lindsay Lohan landed in India yesterday where she's taking part in a BBC documentary on child sex trafficking. And she's already making a difference! Just hours after landing, she hopped on Twitter to proclaim that "over 40 children" have been "saved so far." What she did to save these kids isn't clear (especially when she could use some saving herself), but why quibble over details? [Us]
• In other (and more dubious) LiLo news, the Daily News reports that Lohan has a new man: "Lindsay Lohan is covering all her bases before she ships off to India—and that includes kissing several boys goodbye." Given she's already left the country, you may want to ignore what follows from there, but the guy she's supposedly seeing is Adam Senn, the model and bad boy from first season of The City, who met LiLo during Fashion Week and is someone Senn is hoping to "get to know even better." [NYDN]
• Have Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel broken up? Who knows, but he was supposedly seen flirting with a bunch of women the other night. [P6]
• Today in Tiger: The number of women Woods has been cheating with hit 13 yesterday afternoon, just as racy text messages that Tiger sent Jaimee Grubbs and Rachel Uchitel surfaced. In other Tiger mistress news, a video featuring porn star Holly Sampson bragging about having sex with Tiger Woods also turned up yesterday. And Uchitel is supposedly planning to get tested for STDs now that she's found out how many women Tiger has been hooking up with.

The worst meltdown of Casey Johnson's life coincides with a career high for Tila Tequila, a mysterious flower bouquet arrives at the Woods residence, and Liza Minnelli settles a $100M lawsuit for sexually assaulting her bodyguard. Thursday gossip, voila.

• It looks like Tiger Woods' wife has had enough. Elin Nordegren moved out of the couple's Florida home yesterday and is staying at another home nearby. It doesn't look like she's planning to come back. Swedish news outlets are reporting that she paid $2.3 million to buy a house in in Sweden last week. [Radar, NYDN, NYP]
• Another 911 call was received from Tiger Woods' house last night. It's still unclear what happened, but an ambulance transported a middle-aged woman to the hospital and a "blonde woman" reportedly followed behind in an Escalade. One possibility is that it was Elin Nordegren's mom, who flew to the U.S. last week to be with her daughter. [TMZ, Radar]
• Yet another Woods mistress may be getting ready to come forward. And this one's claiming she has cell phone photos of Tiger's nether regions. Playgirl says it's is in the process of "authenticating" the pics to make sure it's him. How it plans to do that is unclear, although there are nine women (and counting) who should be able to help, presumably. [Us]
• Uma Thurman and fiancé Arki Busson have called it quits. And Bernie Madoff may be partly to blame. The Swiss financier reportedly lost a bundle investing with Madoff, and that may have put a strain on the relationship. [NYP]

Angelina's secret second family: seven Muslim children, and a wife. Lady Gaga spawns jokes about old queens, Suri Cruise goes glam like never before, Tiger Woods' wife buys a mansion in Sweden. Tuesday gossip keeps coming back for more.

• Tiger Woods' mistress tally is quickly approaching the double digits. Jamie Jungers, a Las Vegas model, says she had a two-year affair with Woods; then there's Cori Rist, an aspiring model, who says she started seeing Woods after meeting him at Butter. To top it all off, porn star Holly Sampson has also been mentioned as a woman Woods was involved with, although she's yet to confirm or deny the report. Meanwhile, Queen Oprah thoughtfully reached out to Tiger over the weekend and offered him the opportunity to tell his side of the story, and that may be his best chance yet of somehow saving his rep at this point. [NYDN, E! NYDN]
• Alexa Joel, the daughter of Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley, is recovering at home after what seems to have been a suicide attempt on Saturday. Joel took a bunch of homeopathic sleeping pills—possibly because she was upset over a break-up—and then called 911 herself. [NYP, NYDN, NYP]

Who hasn't slept with Tiger Woods? An actress who debuted in The Wonder Years, then went on to OMG Stop Tickling Me joins Tiger's stable; Lohan looks surprisingly hot in a faux-threesome; reality stars eat rats. Monday gossip ahoy!

They didn't cancel him for gay kissing, they canceled him for gay kissing without warning; Miley Cyrus copies one of Lindsay Lohan's tattoos; Rihanna cops to being a size queen. Friday's gossip is sassy-meowing all over the place.

Lindsay Lohan's Rashomon-like love life takes three different turns in one day, Tiger Mistress #1 prepares to tell all, and the Salahis cancel Christmas. Come bathe in a sea of Thursday's gossip.

Whitney Port walking home after paying a visit to a salon in the West Village ... Lindsay Lohan catching a flight at JFK ... Morgan Freeman leaving his hotel ... Naomi Watts walking with her mom in SoHo ... Matt Damon filming scenes for The Adjustment Bureau in Madison Square Park ... Jessica Simpson leaving the Ritz-Carlton in Midtown ... Jessica Szohr walking to the set of Gossip Girl on the Upper West Side ... Audrina Patridge crossing the street ... Josh Duhamel jogging ... Michael Buble leaving ABC after an appearance on Regis & Kelly ... Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz leaving the Ambassador Theatre on West 49th Street ... and Cate Blanchett walking with her sons.

• Tiger Woods released a statement this morning: "I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart. I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves. [TMZ]
• One thing that may have pushed Tiger to finally issue the apology: While Rachel Uchitel didn't want to cop to hooking up with Woods, two other women turned up to take her place yesterday. A 24-year-old waitress named Jaimee Grubbs appeared with tawdry text messages from Woods to back up her story. (Sample: "I will wear you out!") And a Vegas club manager came out to say she's been having an affair with him "for some time." [Us, NYP, NYDN]
• Tiger won't face criminal charges for crashing his SUV outside his Florida home. He's getting a traffic ticket and may pay a $164 fine. [Us]
• Bill Clinton is pumped his daughter Chelsea is marrying investment banker Marc Mezvinsky because, Bill says, Marc is a "great human being." Not only that, but when Hillary is traveling, Chelsea and Marc take pity on poor old Bill and take him to dinner and the movies. [People]
• Russian billionaire Roman Abramovich just bought a $90 million estate in St. Barts and now everyone is expecting him to throw the "It" Christmas party of the year. No word on whether the Salahis were invited. Not that the lack of an invite will stop them from attending anyway, of course. [P6]

"I feel bad" for boyfriends whose girlfriends don't send them XXX self-portraits, says Rihanna; Tiger Woods' sexy texts messages are out; LiLo and SamRo make nice. Wednesday's gossip is one nip slip short of a tabloid triathlon.

• Rachel Uchitel, Tiger Woods' alleged mistress, is calling the allegations that she had an affair with the golfer "dumb," "stupid," and "ridiculous," and says "it's like asking me to comment if there are aliens on earth." Worst of all, she's bummed that as a result of this whole saga some "nice, normal guy" that she might eventually settle down with is "going to have a tainted view" of her. Meanwhile, friends and former colleagues of Uchitel say the party-promoting, celebrity-wrangling widow and divorcée has been obsessed with getting close to celebrities for years, is a "drama queen" and "fire-starter," and has had numerous run-ins with her employers in the past. [NYP, NYDN]
• What's Tiger up to? He bailed out of a golf tournament in California later this week and still hasn't come out of his house. [Us, NYP]
• Troubled Johnson & Johnson heiress Casey Johnson was arrested yesterday for stealing jewelry, clothing, shoes, and even underwear from a model pal. The really disturbing part: Johnson allegedly left a wet towel and "used vibrator" at the scene of the crime as her "calling card." [NYP, TMZ]
• Tareq and Michaele Salahi, "the most infamous party crashers in the world," appeared on the Today show this morning to tell Matt Lauer they did nothing wrong. The couple claim some mystery evidence—to be released at a later date— will prove they were invited to last week's state dinner. [MSNBC]

Jennifer Aniston takes Morocco by....storm? She's dating (or not dating) a camel. Posh Spice has bunions. Jake Gyllenhaal is special. Courtney Love's greatest hookup ever. Thanksgiving Dinner at the Waverly Inn. LiLo being LiLo. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

• Last night's state dinner drew quite a crowd. On hand of the occasion: Katie Couric (accompanied by beau Brooks Perlin), Gayle King (sans Oprah), Brian Williams, Mayor Bloomberg (with Diana Taylor), Ari Emanuel, M. Night Shyamalan, Steven Spielberg, Jeffrey Katzenberg, and David Geffen (accompanied by his youthful boyfriend). Jennifer Hudson provided the entertainment; Naeem Khan was responsible for Michelle Obama's gold dress. [Politico, Reuters, NYP]
• She may not be in rehab (yet), but Lindsay Lohan is supposedly now in counseling and seeing someone a few times a week. It's a start, isn't it? [MSNBC]
• In what may be the most dubious story ever published by Us, a source tells the tabloid that Angelina Jolie "hates" President Obama because he's "all about welfare and handouts" and is really "a socialist in disguise." Naturally, the source goes on to say that Brad Pitt is still a fan of Obama, which means the two "get in nasty arguments" about politics "all the time." [Us]

It a rare occasion when there's good Lindsay Lohan news to report, but today is one of those days. The CEO of Emanuel Ungaro, Mounir Moufarrige, says the fashion has no plans to drop LiLo as its "artistic adviser" even though her debut in Pairs last month was panned by critics and it's been rumored that retailers haven't exactly been lining up to carry the collection. Of course, the final decision is in the hands of Ungaro's owner Asim Abdullah—and he may not be on the same page with Moufarrige—but let's focus on the positive, shall we? [Reuters]

John Mayer making a girl's wildest dreams come true on the streets of Soho ... Lindsay Lohan arriving at JFK ... Katie Holmes shopping with daughter Suri and stepdaughter Isabella ... Jon Gosselin leaving an office building and heading to Cosi for breakfast ... Mark Wahlberg watching a Knicks game ... Zac Efron heading into Sarabeth's on Central Park South ... Josh Duhamel arriving at JFK ... Michael Douglas walking to the set of Wall Street 2 ... Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts walking their dog ... Matt Damon carrying a cup of coffee on the set of The Adjustment Bureau ... Christy Turlington picking up daughter Grace from school ... ... Susan Boyle getting in an SUV outside her hotel ... and Rihanna waiting for her car outside JFK.

Seems only yesterday our culture was run by racism-ranting heiresses, rampaging redheads and self-mutilating pop stars. Suddenly, the whole culture is being run by bleacher-sitting T-shirt-wearing dorks who celebrate life-long commitment. This can't be good for democracy.

• Are Jude Law and Sienna Miller back together? That's what it looked like when the duo were seen cavorting at The Box last Thursday, but reps for the two are denying it. [NYDN]
• Either Jay-Z is a really thoughtful husband or Beyoncé is a bit of a control freak, but Jay refused to take photos with the models at the Victoria's Secret fashion show last week supposedly "out of respect" for his wife. [P6]
• Heidi Klum has officially taken Seal's last name and is now Heidi Samuel. Please update your address books, thanks. [People]
• The American Music Awards took place last night. Some highlights: Taylor Swift won three awards; Michael Jackson won four posthumous prizes; Lady Gaga set a piano on fire; Adam Lambert's S&M-themed closing act involved getting a mock blowjob and kissing a male band member; and Jennifer Lopez fell down on her most famous asset, but she managed to pick herself up and carry on as if nothing had happened. [People, MSNBC, TMZ]

• Mariah Carey must be determined to earn back the title of "world's most demanding diva." For an appearance at a London shopping shopping center to kick off the holiday season, she asked for 20 white kittens, 100 white doves, and confetti shaped like butterflies. She also requested a Rolls-Royce, pink carpet, pink podium, and a security staff of 80 to protect her entourage of 15. Then again all she asked for in her dressing room were a few bottles of water, so it isn't as if she's totally out of control, is it? [NYDN, DM]
• Jude Law made the unfortunate decision to move into a building next to an NYU dorm and he hasn't been too happy about the students who invariably look down on him as he plays with his kids or works out with his trainer. When Law recently noticed students waving at him from across the way, he responded by pelting their windows with oranges. That'll do it! [NYP]
• Madonna is still saving the world. But she isn't taking any chances while she does it, clearly. She insisted on wearing a bullet-proof vest under her jacket while touring a "lawless" Rio de Janeiro favela recently. [P6]
• Lindsay Lohan's gig at Emanuel Ungaro may be coming to an end soon. The company's chairman reportedly wants her out since he, like the rest of the world, wasn't impressed with the "cheesy and dated" outfits she debuted at Paris Fashion Week, and many stores are refusing to carry the line. Ungaro CEO Mounir Moufarrige wants to keep her, though, to save face. [P6]

Courtenay Semel, the sapphic spawn of former Yahoo CEO Terry Semel, is quoted in the lesbian magazine Curve dissing former lady friend Lindsay Lohan. Then she complains that the media twists her relationships. The nerve of this one.