“It’s one thing to say, ‘Get off my property or else,’ but once people start issuing highly specific threats like, ‘I will kill you in this or that way,’ you know it’s going to be a long day.” A day in the life of a social worker for the mentally ill.

This new Vice report on mental illness in Chicago's jails is enough to make you wonder whether mass incarceration is a less than perfect solution to America's social problems.

The three Los Angeles Police Department officers who shot and killed Brian Beaird after a car chase on live television in 2013 will not face criminal charges, the Los Angeles Times reports. Beaird, a 51-year-old a National Guard veteran, suffered from mental illness.

Following up on an earlier "Public Statement" that revealed he was "penniless" and had been living in his truck, Creed signer Scott Stapp uploaded two more rambling videos this week, discussing his financial troubles, the removal of God from American life and the vengeance soon to find those who have wronged him.

Amanda Bynes released an apologetic statement through a lawyer today, after recordings of her threatening to murder her family leaked online. "I'm sorry I trusted people who clearly were not my friends and capitalized on my illness," she said. "I am doing my best to get better."

Last week, troubled young woman Heidi Montag reached out to troubled young woman Amanda Bynes via Twitter and offered her a place to stay. How nice. She doubled down on her embarrassingly misguided and deeply unhelpful opportunism in a recent interview with Extra.

Amanda Bynes was released from her psychiatric hold at a Los Angeles hospital yesterday when a hearing officer ruled she was stable enough that she could not be held involuntarily. She left, wandered along Sunset Blvd., and ate diner food by herself.

Sarah Palin is tired of John Boehner's genteel, country-club "let's sue the president" politicking. Illegal immigrants are pouring into America and beating her like a cowed domestic, Palin says, adding that it's time to pull a "Goodbye, Earl" on the president, or something to that effect.

A Philadelphia man who fatally shot his sister-in-law in April of 2007 had been awaiting trial for seven years before he was transferred today to a state-run nursing home. According to Philly.com, various assessments showed that Marvae Dunn, 64, was not aware enough to stand trial.

When the police found me I was standing on a subway platform, somewhere in Brooklyn, barefoot, wearing only soccer shorts in October, and crying. My hands were folded behind my head like a captured soldier. For the previous 12 hours I had wandered the streets of New York, convinced that I was being videotaped, Truman Show-style, by hidden cameras. I made my living as a public defender in Brooklyn, but I did standup at night. I'd recently met with a network executive to discuss a pilot for a reality show based on my act; now I thought the city was my set.

According to documents released Thursday, Miriam Carey—the woman fatally shot earlier this month after a car chase in Washington D.C.—believed President Obama had “put her residence under electronic surveillance and that it was being fed live to all the national news outlets."

Last Tuesday, Michael Brandon Hill allegedly entered a Georgia elementary school with more than 500 rounds of ammunition, an AK-47, and a clear intention to end his life and the lives of those around him. Fortunately, the 20-year-old came in contact with Antoinette Tuff, a compassionate bookkeeper who ultimately talked the young man into surrendering before anyone on the premises was physically hurt.

After a rash of rhubarb burglaries in a nondescript Iowa town, local residents set out to uncover the culprit — only to discover that the person behind the leafy larceny is exactly the kind of person you'd expect would steal someone else's hard-grown rhubarb.

Mentally ill people make up 17% of the jail population in Los Angeles. "If you're trying to figure out what makes for a desirable therapeutic environment...'this ain't it.'"

Welcome to our science-like new feature, "Hey, Science," in which we will have our most provocative scientific questions answered by real live scientists (or related experts). No question is too smart for us to tackle, theoretically speaking. This week, experts answer the question: Do animals get mental illnesses, just like humans? Or is your dog just dumb?

Three days before 20-year-old Adam Lanza killed his mother, then opened fire on a classroom full of Connecticut kindergartners, my 13-year-old son Michael (name changed) missed his bus because he was wearing the wrong color pants.

When Rep. Jesse Jackson, Jr. emerged from last summer's disappearance—he had, his family said, been seeking treatment for bipolar disorder at the Mayo Clinic—his chief of staff told reporters that he was "convalescing with his wife and children at home in Washington." But last week, he was seen convalescing in a D.C. bar with two different women on two consecutive nights.

Jared Lee Loughner returned to court today, where authorities established that the accused mass murderer is still insane. According to a government psychiatrist, Loughner believes he killed Gabrielle Giffords, has "several imaginary friends," and lost TV privileges because he thought the tube was sending him messages. When doctors informed him that he is insane, he was reportedly "devastated." [NYT, images via AP]

Prosecutors have charged two Fullerton, California police officers involved in the death of Kelly Thomas, a schizophrenic, homeless man who was brutally beaten during a confrontation with six Fullerton cops in early July. It sounds like they're not kidding around, either.

Triathlon danger! Heat death! Twin town! Crazy leaders! Spermless mosquitoes! Teen vaccines! Worthless soy! Old surgery! And the very latest way that you're killing your poor children! It's your Tuesday Health Watch, where we watch your health—microscopically!