Earlier today, we alerted you all to the center of gravity for Manhattan Starbucks, the specific point where one can be closest to all of the island's Starbucks, located "somewhere between 5th and 6th, in between 39th and 40th." While our commenters have pondered the magnitude of Starbucks' reach and whether or not Matt Damon and Barnes & Noble are in on the sinister plot to brainwash us all with Venti Pumpkin Spice Lattes, a source has identified what, exactly, lies at corporate coffee's Ground Zero: DENNIS PUBLISHING.

• Arthur Danto, professor of philosophy and ridiculous event titles, lectures at the School of Visual Arts on "Embodied Meanings as Aesthetic Ideas." [flavorpill]
• Hiroshima Mon Amour, a French movie set in Japan, gives you twice the bang for your cultural buck at the French Institute. Thrifty and uplifting, we're sure. [Paper]
• Hard-Fi, the newest incarnation of the British band that comes to town and takes all our women and booze, plays at the Bowery Ballroom tonight. [Upcoming]

Sightings are sent in by readers; send yours to tips@gawker.com.

Thanks to an array of disturbing mathematical calculations, some dorky-hot fellow has calculated the Starbucks Center of Gravity for Manhattan — the single location where you can be closest to all other Starbucks. Described as existing "somewhere between 5th and 6th, in between 39th and 40th," this Starbucks is the Ground Zero of corporate coffee. If you can figure out the exact address, let us know — we'll gladly spread the word and send the violent hippies to the proper protest location.

When we saw the front page of today's Post, we were a teensy bit horrified by the juxtaposition of Golden Globe non-winner Eva Longoria (ensemble wins are for individual losers) with a headline regarding poor little Nixzmary Brown, the 7-year-old girl who was tortured and beaten to death by her own parents. Watching the Globes wasn't that bad — that Steve Carell is such a doll. How can someone even place these two items on the same front page?

• For the priviliged individuals who actually practice federal holidays, Come Share the Dream includes discussion, music, and a documentary in the city's largest tribute to MLK. [flavorpill]
• A little less respect and a lot more vodka is involved in Sweet Paprika, the comedy show hosted by Allison Castillo and Ophira Eisenberg. Tonight's show kicks off at 9 at The D-Lounge, 101 East 15th Street.
• This second comedy show is different from the first in that it's called "Tell Your Friends" and it's being held at Lolita at 8. Feel free to make other distinctions as you wish. [Upcoming]

Or at least Fifth Avenue is. A tipster finds a small crowd on Fifth between 46th and 47th earlier this afternoon, apparently panning for gold:

Friday:
• One, Two, Three, the Jimmy Cagney Cold War classic, plays tonight through Thursday at the Film Forum. If you were hoping for a little less crime and a little more puppetry, the Landmark Sunshine screens The Muppet Movie at midnight. [flavorpill & Paper]
• "Too Art for TV" combines animation and Fighting-the-Man in a display of art from "animated minds long repressed by television's corporate demands." The Stay Gold Gallery (451 Grand St. Brooklyn, NY) hosts an opening reception tonight from 7-11.
Saturday:
• The English Beat's Friday show is sold out, but tickets are still available for Saturday night at the Canal Room. Hurry; the demand for British ska from the 80s is obviously very, very high. [flavorpill]
• Akron/Family plays at the Knitting Factory tonight. To save you some time, we'll go ahead and tell you: it's a city in Ohio. [Upcoming]
Sunday:
• The dancing kids will be at Avalon for "I Have a Dream," which features "a who's who of the teeth-grinding circuit." MLK did not die in vain. [Sunday]

Dude, what are you doing tonight? Oh, shit, you don't have plans? Awesome, 'cause T-Brah just booked this totally bumping Party Bus for tonight! Seriously, yo: this fucking bus, man, it'll pick you up and take you wherever you want. Like, Murray Hill and the Meatpacking District and all that hotness. But, swear, you're not even gonna want to leave the bus. You can fucking smoke and drink in that bitch, yeah, whatever you want. We're all going, and Rob even called those two strippers — yeah, the Tampa girls, you KNOW it — to come along, 'cause this motherfucker has POLES in it! The entire pledge class is signed up for tonight — aw, God, it's gonna be so awesome.

A new study out today from a homeless-advocacy group ranks the 20 U.S. cities meanest to the homeless. New York ranks 14th. Though it's nice to know we're less mean than Little Rock, Atlanta, or Dallas, that we even made the list is at least moderately distressing news to everyone who likes to think of our fair city as a shining beacon of enlightened tolerance and old-school liberalism.

In this edition of Gawker Stalker: Kevin Connolly performs a cheap parlor trick with Jeremy Piven at Suede, La Lohan, La Moss, Nicole Kidman, Katie Couric, Bob Woodruff, Meryl Streep, Elijah Wood, Ben Gibbard of Death Cab, Moby, Sandra Bernhard, Anna Paquin, Mike Myers, Jane Fonda, Patricia Wettig and Ken Olin, Ron Rifkin, Victor Garber, Michael Kors, Malcolm Gladwell, Betsey Johnson, John Lithgow, Ruth Reichl, Tony Danza, BD Wong, Bobby Flay, Andrew Shue, Ice T, Gavin Degraw, and Wayne from the Wonder Years.

• 'Hoos in the Media features UVA alums and a discussion on "issues facing the media today," like bitches, skanks and hoos. (We had to, really.) [UVANYC]
• Coporeal, opening tonight at PPOW Gallery, features a compilation of Carolee Schneemann's "edgy and often under-the-radar" work. That's code for "wildly unpopular but likely to become appreciated once she's long dead." [flavorpill]
• We Are Scientists plays the Bowery Ballroom tonight. Urban Outfitters sells an ironic t-shirt with the same slogan tomorrow. [Upcoming]

Silly us: When we reported yesterday that Kate Moss and Lindsay Lohan had hit the Lower East Side's faux-hip Dark Room, we assumed their night had peaked with Lohan using a Sharpie and a bathroom wall to express her feelings about that "cunt" Scarlett Johansson. We were certain that they went home after that, nice and early, like the responsible ladies we all know them to be.

• Those who can't perform, produce. Those who produce and then, on the side, insist on performing until Kanye West's label finally signs them, call themselves SA-RA Creative partners. Tonight at the Canal Room. [flavorpill]
• The 92nd Street Y hosts Philip Seymour Hoffman for a screening and discussion of his Oscar-rocket Capote. Truman himself apprently debuted In Cold Blood (the film's subject) from the very same room. Just to add to the "specialness" factor. [Paper]
• An RSVP and (at least) two corduroy items are required at the second meeting of The Corduroy Appreciation Club, tonight at the Dove. Just wanted to get the rules out there, because it's important that everyone take this seriously. [Corduroy Club]

We hear that last night at about 11:30, none other than Lindsay Lohan and Kate Moss sauntered into the Dark Room during the Tarts of Pleasure DJ set. Apparently the BFFs were looking for a venue where they wouldn't be noticed, so Last Year's Favorite Blow Bar seemed an appropriate choice for two "recovered" drug users. The ladies stayed there for the remainder of the night (presumably because they love hanging out with folks like Carlos D and My Chemical Romance); over the course of the evening, Lohan expressed her fondness for Gang of Four while Moss laid low and acted model-like.

Found on Craigslist this afternoon:

• Lindsay Robertson, Alex Balk, and Jon Friedman host tonight's Ritalin Reading at Mo Pitkins, where no author will bore you for more than five minutes. A bunch of other people will be there, too, but that's as many names as we have attention for. (The jokes, they write themselves.) [RitalinReadings]
• Schizophrenic band Cordero brings its "diverse" indie rock/Latin-pop fusion to the hipster homogeneity of the Mercury Lounge. [Upcoming]
• Gardar Eide Einarsson presents Ship of Fools, a play written by Ted Kaczynski, our beloved Unabomber. Each ticket comes with a free pass to a Department of Homeland Security holding cell. [flavorpill]

In this edition of the Stalk: Liza Minnelli, Luke Wilson, Benicio Del Toro, Anderson Cooper, Peter Dinklage and Ann Magnuson, Josh Hartnett, Tim Robbins, Jimmy Fallon, The Donald and Melania, Reese Witherspoon, Mira Sorvino, Jon Corzine, Larry and Mrs. David, Pierce Brosnan, Keanu Reeves, Elijah Wood, Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward, Marc Jacobs, Will Arnett, Richard Gere and Carrie Lowell, Lena Olin, Ryan Adams, Heather Graham, Kevin Connolly, Ed Burns and Christy Turlington, Tom Cavanaugh, Keri Russell, Chris Parnell, Jon Bon Jovi, and Rachael Ray

[Click to enlarge.]

When news broke in the Times last week that the Second Avenue Deli was shuttered, at least temporarily and perhaps more permanently, in a rent dispute, it seemed partially tragic but also partially perhaps just a particularly intense game of real-estate chicken between the hondlers who own the deli and the hondlers who own the building. The latter option seemed increasingly likely when the second-day story revealed that the rent increase sought by the building's new owners was in fact built into the existing lease, negotiated 15 years ago.