Christina Aguilera's mugshot wasn't supposed to be released, but here it is, anyway. Scarlett Johansson gives Sean Penn a lap dance with her foot. Montana Fishburne narrowly avoids jailtime. Wednesday gossip sneaks forbidden peeks.

Lindsay Lohan gets a "tripped out effect" from sunglasses lined with flashing lights. James Franco has a sex tape. Rihanna's purported lesbian lover speaks. Montana Fishburne pretends to drink bleach. Tuesday gossip is a rave.

Snooki sings a requiem for her coiffure of yore. Penelope Cruz confirms her pregnancy. Montana Fishburne is going to rehab. Chelsea Clinton averts her eyes from her husband. Come revel in the delights of Tuesday gossip.

"Do it again," murmurs Miley after a public, videotaped spanking. Drew Barrymore wants to punch a "bitch" journalist. Enrique Iglesias: "Fame is the best aphrodisiac you can have." Thursday gossip is for the fetishists.

J.Lo's assistants aren't allowed significant others or vacations. Fred Armisen dumped Elisabeth Moss for a younger SNL cast member. Montana Fishburne explains the weird spots on her butt. Naomi Campbell cheats on her taxes. Thursday gossip rules with fear.

The Soup highlighted all America's biggest issues. Glenn Beck thinks it's all about Mountain Dew and Cheetos, Nancy Grace blames the booze and hot pants, and Joel McHale is just concerned about Montana Fishburne's best-selling porn.

To prove she is a natural human, an aging actress must post flawed pictures online. Montana Fishburne faces criminal charges for beating up her boyfriend's ex. Kelsey Grammer's flight attendant girlfriend is pregnant. Thursday gossip contains the circle of life.

You oughta know that Alanis has a bun in the oven. Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush get into a drunken brawl. Boy George thinks Lady Gaga is full of it. Jennifer Aniston pities Lindsay Lohan. Isn't Wednesday gossip ironic?

Lady Gaga crowd surfs in pasties and fishnet, and gets licked. Dina Lohan plans a family garage sale. Katy Perry's new song is about how bad her ex-boyfriend was in bed. Monday gossip is orally fixated.

Snooki's about to get a lot more boring. Spencer Pratt spent seven grand on strippers. Lady Gaga wears another outrageous outfit! Joe Biden meets a guy in an Obama mask. Saturday's Gossip Roundup is undiscovered country. Let's explore.

A Siegfried & Roy sex tape scandal involves unwanted groping and a male employee. Emma Watson cuts her hair. Laurence Fishburne offers $1 million to block his daughter's porn debut. Justin Timberlake goes gay. TGIFriday gossip.

Montana Fishburne says her forthcoming sex tape is a calculated career choice. Foxy Brown flees the police after a massive brawl. Lindsay Lohan has no pillow. Robert Pattinson is a nail biter. TGIFriday gossip. Updated with Montana's DVD cover.