To prove she is a natural human, an aging actress must post flawed pictures online. Montana Fishburne faces criminal charges for beating up her boyfriend's ex. Kelsey Grammer's flight attendant girlfriend is pregnant. Thursday gossip contains the circle of life.

  • Pissed at the people who say she's had plastic surgery, Teri Hatcher took to Facebook with a photo album called "Oy with the Botox!!!" featuring photos of herself dripping wet and furrowing her brow: "Out of the bath getting ready for bed. Thought about all those damn critics of my face. Love it or hate it, my face that is, no surgery, no implants, no matter what 'they' say. Decided I'd shoot myself in to reveal some truths about 'beauty' and hope it makes you all easier on yourself." She compared a bulging vein in her forehead to Julia Roberts and concludes, "You create your own paradise or prison. Being happy inside is all that matters." How peculiar that our female celebrities must bend over backwards to prove that they are not sythetic. When the androids take over, there will be precedent. [Us, Facebook]
  • Rihanna has a new neck tattoo. "Rebelle fleur," it says. That's French for "rebellious flower." Like a weed? [JustJared]
  • Meet Kayte Walsh. She's a British flight attendant "from a family of footballers" and she is pregnant with Kelsey Grammer's fifth child. This seems to confirm Page Six's story that Kelsey is pushing for a quickie divorce from third wife Camille Donatacci so he can be public and raise a child with number four. Kelsey is 26 years Kayte's senior, making him two years older than her father, who is now a soccer coach. Her brother is a professional soccer player. Kayte and Kelsey are thought to have met in New York, which Kayte visits regularly flying for Virgin Airways. Between this and Steven Slater, it is Flight Attendant Week in the world of gossip. [DailyMail, P6]
  • Montana Fishburne—daughter of Laurence and budding porn star—is being prosecuted for assault with a deadly weapon (and possibly false imprisonment, too) after storming into her boyfriend's ex's home and beating the crap out of her. Montana's lawyer: Shawn Chapman Holley, the woman who represents Lindsay Lohan. [TMZ]
  • Pulled over for speeding, Jessica Alba smiled at the cop. He let her off with just a warning. [TMZ]
  • Jerry O'Connell plays "someone loosely based on Joe Francis" in upcoming spring break gore fest Piranha 3D. Apparently his penis gets bitten off, and then the disembodied wiener flies towards the audience in three dimensions. "I get to play Joe Francis," O'Connell happily exclaimed. "Oh wait, for legal reasons I'm supposed to say, 'I play someone loosely based on Joe Francis.'" This sounds like a good movie. [P6]
  • A mysterious brunette who looks like a grown-up Selena Gomez has been photographed with Jesse James and daughter Sunny. Girlfriend? Nanny? [TMZ]
  • Leonardo DiCaprio is a cockblocker. Charlize Theron "was spotted with a handsome younger guy" and was "super attentive" to him until Leo showed up and "politely interrupted to say hello. Charlize then turned on the charm to Leo—and totally ignored her new guy friend." DiCaprio'ed: It's like getting Kanye'd, but instead of grabbing your microphone, he grabs his your woman. [NatEnquirer via CelebSlam]
  • "Duggar Daughters: Trapped!" Star reports that the eldest members of 19 Kids & Counting's fundamentalist Christian brood are the Cinderellas of child care, unfairly impounded and forced to serve, "cooking all meals, changing diapers, homeschooling their siblings, giving haircuts and washing the clothes they make themselves." Hopefully one of their young adult rebellions will include tattoos and soft core porn. [Star]
  • Paris Hilton faces a $35 million lawsuit for failing to wear the cheap "Clipin-Go" hair extensions she is paid to endorse. They're also annoyed at her for skipping events and breaking laws. [TMZ]
  • "[Stripper clearinghouse] Scores is a comfort zone for me," said Real Housewife of New Jersey Danielle Staub, who held her birthday party there. But her rival Kim G. crashed the party! Woe is Danielle. [P6]
  • Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens did shots to celebrate Zac's Details cover story. Vanessa: This one's for telling them about my bidet! [Gulp] Zac: And this one's for for the line about shampooing my anus! [Gulp!] [P6]
  • At a toy store in Tokyo's Harajuku district, Angelina Jolie limited her children to "just two items each," even though Maddox wanted four. Shiloh got a pirate toy by a manga brand called One Piece, and several kids bought toys depicting characters from Ponyo, Hayao Miyazaki's anime epic. "They are very polite and adorable," said a store employee. [Us]
  • American Idol winner Fantasia Barrino has been released from the hospital after overdosing on aspirin and sleeping pills. The hospitalization came after Fantasia admitted to dating a married man "off and on for 11 months." Antwaun Cook managed a T-Mobile store in Charlotte, North Carolina. His wife is taking legal action, which could put Fantasia in jeopardy because North Carolina is among the few states that allows bitter exes to sue "home wreckers." [People, People]
  • Meanwhile, another American Idol contestant—season 7's Asia'h Epperson—was arrested last night for beating up a lady at a nightclub. [TMZ]