We're not sure of what to make of this, but it appears that someone has hacked Miramax's website for Hero, replacing the page's central picture of Jet Li with a grainy picture of a teenage-looking girl. (The hacker's girlfriend? A still from a porno? The ghost of a former Miramax employee driven to suicide by Harvey Weinstein?) Very strange indeed. Developing...
Remember supposedly A-list actor/pseudonymous blogger Rance? It used to be something of a blogger parlor game to try and divine his real-life identity, with guesses regularly attempting to out him as authentic (Ben Affleck, Owen Wilson, Jim Carrey, or George Clooney) or expose him as a "fake." No matter, he weathered the speculation (much of it coming from Defamer) and kept on blogging—until recently, when he began a search for a replacement Rance and largely turned over the site to guest-bloggers from his audience. This forced bloodthirsty blogger/actor hunters (again, us) to find new pursuits (more drinking, a fruitless hunt for Tara Reid's secret blog) and Rance to retire his title of Hollywood Fixation of the Month.
TVGasm reports a mysterious altercation from The Lot in Hollywood yesterday, where a Shark from the WB show Jack & Bobby threw down with a Jet from Jodie Foster's feature Flightplan. Details are sketchy, but TVGasm does say that "at least" five cop cars swooped in to squash the violence. Hopefully the fuzz arrived before any bike chains were rattled or stuntmen could be summoned to carefully choreograph a fist-fight in accordance with union guidelines. Developing...
Apparently ruling the Hollywood sex-trade with an iron fist, being woodenly portrayed by Meadow Soprano, or staying in a long-term relationship with a domestically pugilistic, B-list addict weren't hard-core enough activities for Heidi Fleiss. Fleiss is slapping her name on some hard-core adult videos called Secrets of the Hollywood Madam that take porn fans "on a cinematic journey into realistic and graphic sexual depictions that showcase the 'dirty work' performed by her former working girls." Think Charlie Sheen's excited to finally have some kind of documentary record of his off-camera life in the '80s? We hope they at least found someone with good abs who once had a SAG card to play him, you know, so he'll have something nice to show his new kid.
Jim Hill of Jim Hill Media drops a barrage of new Lindsay Lohan-related bombs on our unsuspecting heads with news from the set (and from behind the scenes) of Herbie: Fully Loaded, where's Lohan's supposed partying is spooking Disney into considering extreme measures—and not the kind where Michael Eisner buys her Irish Car Bombs just to see what happens.
We thought that the Kabbalah Centre's declaration that they were going to make the Israelis and Palestinian spontaneously engage in a group hug was easily going to be the most egregiously unhinged press release we'd encounter today. When are we going to learn? The Columbus Citizens Foundation, an organization committed to "preserving the rich Italian-American heritage," calls out Steven Spielberg and DreamWorks because the animated fishies in Shark Tale will brainwash kids into thinking all Italians are like the gesticulating, stab-happy Joe Pesci of GoodFellas.
A reader is disappointed at the (predictably) low-wattage attendees at this weekend's L.A. Short Film Festival. Teller without Penn? A guy from 7th Heaven? No one goes to a short film festival for the glitter factor, they go to indulge a short attention span. If you had your heart set on trolling for the famous that night, you'd have had a more productive night wandering the Cheescake Factory in Sherman Oaks.
Today, Defamer and Gawker Media (you know, the people that sign our paychecks and keep us in off-brand whiskey from huge, plastic bottles) launch a custom blog for A Dirty Shame, the latest movie from the twisted John Waters. Gawker HQ has signed up evil genius Remy Stern (from the New Yorkish blog and Gawker's previous Nike "Art of Speed" custom blog) to handle the writing duties and fill you in on the cinematic collision of Johnny Knoxville, Selma Blair, head injuries, and sexual obsessions. Stop by, say hello, and find out why the Catholic Church has already branded the movie "morally offensive."
Thanks to everyone that sent us a link to Manny Perry's comics page incarnation in The Boondocks this weekend. Aaron McGruder's version is a bit more menacing than the round-faced, amiable MPAA "Respect Copyrights" propaganda puppet that we've grown to know, love, and pelt with pirate-flavored barbs, but that didn't stop us from reflexively launching a chorus of ARRRRRRRRRs at the computer monitor all weekend. Yes, we felt somewhat impotent doing that, but there's no room for personal vanity in the revolution.
Because of the MPAA's nagging "Respect Copyrights" campaign, we all know that stuntman/propaganda puppet Manny Perry makes movies. But who watches movies? According to this trailer from the website Loading Ready Run, a lot of people fed up with the browbeating anti-piracy ads inflicted on people who have already paid for a movie ticket. Sadly, there are no pirate noises, but the message "Put an end to anti-piracy ads" still rings true. The movement lives!
A design professional who claims to "do this for a living" offers some additional insights into the apparent failings of the Jersey Girl video box, which we deconstructed for you yesterday. (Click the thumbnail at left to see the full image.) We certainly lack credentials in this field, but we'll still take a stab at answering point #11: a) Biggs has no shame left after gaining his fame through the insertion of his penis into baked goods (it always comes back to pie-fucking, doesn't it? Wear it like a badge of honor, Biggs!), and b) Tyler's not actually looking at the consumer, she just has those spooky eyes that follow you wherever you go—don't tease, her mother was a model/groupie and her father, well, you know. Something about that combo indicates less-than-optimal prenatal care.
We were shrugging off the after-effects of the Labor Day weekend with the Fall TV preview issue of Entertainment Weekly (don't worry, we were in the bathroom) when we noticed an ad for the DVD release of Jersey Girl. With nothing but time on our hands and the unpleasant alternative of actually having to read the prose in EW, we decided to deconstruct the clever composition of the video box. Our analysis is after the jump; click on the picture at left to see the entire image.
Roger L. Simon reports on his blog that the the Motion Picture Academy has come up with a brilliant idea to combat the supposedly rampant piracy of the screener DVDs that members are sent at awards time. Each Academy member will be issued a magical DVD player that can play enchanted, copy-proof discs issued by studios keenly attuned to the evil sorcery of copyright infringement. We suppose this solution proved much more cost-effective and efficient than an earlier plan to have Academy president Frank Pierson travel the country with a reel-to-reel projector and an armed bodyguard, assuring that viewers weren't transcribing films for later posting on internet bulletin boards.
Today, the Jack Valenti Era at the MPAA fades into the ether and the Dan Glickman Era dawns over Hollywood. Valenti's been leading Glickman around by the hand at the RNC, introducing him to the political players crucial to his job as head of the movie lobby. The LAT sits down with Glickman for a brief Q&A, and let's just say that Glickman, the former Clinton Agriculture secretary, is not exactly a sound-bite machine. Observe as the interviewer throws a juicy cut of raw, piracy-related meat on the floor, which Valenti would have devoured in a teeth-gnashing shower of spittle:
Despair, all you aspiring producers who enter here: The PRODUCERMAG blog (all caps theirs) interviews producer Steven Paul, who reveals that he was pretty much born with the touch that allowed him to bring together the magical elements that became The Karate Dog, Baby Geniuses, and SuperBabies: Baby Geniuses 2. So if you've been fetching dry-cleaning and making up inventive excuses to cover for your bosses while they're "in a meeting with a $700 an hour body-relaxation consultant" in order to learn the trade, just give up now. It's fairly clear that you either got the instinct to put Scott Baio in the frame with a talking baby while you were still in the womb, or you're out of luck. Perhaps you would consider a nice career in craft service?
Blog Engadget interviews outgoing MPAA head/pirate-crazy copyright crusader Jack Valenti about technology, his legacy, and the continuing menace posed by digital piracy. The unflappable Valenti was his eloquent, statesman-like self, even invoking great leaders from our past to illustrate the struggle that will continue even through his imminent retirement.
If you've ever sat around with some pals on a lazy summer day and played that game where you dream up a porno titles for mainstream movies, it's a safe bet that the Tomkat Theater in West Hollywood has already topped you with actual XXX fare. And no, I Know Who You Blew Last Summer does not star Jennifer Love Hewitt—unless she's been fooling us all of these years and is packing a big surprise under her skirt.
Now that everyone's grandmother is clogging up Friendster with profiles touting their interests in "dishes full of hard candy" and "euthanasia parties," the social-networking tool is finally safe for Hollywood. According to Variety, Universal is planning "a comedy that will follow relationships formed by fictitious users of the site." We haven't been this excited by the union of cutting edge computer and romantic comedy technology since You've Got Mail. It's going to be hilarious when Jason Biggs turns to one of those other American Pie guys and frets, "Yeah, I slept with her, but I don't even know her! She's only in my third-degree network!"
